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2007 24 November :: 4.14 am
:: Music: The Black Keys - The Breaks
Changing isn't easy, down push me down
60 years crammed into the past three, I've been more places then most of you could imagine. I've also gone not nearly as far as some of you. I can't pretend to imagine everyones individual trials, so I'll handle my own here and now.
There are times when I wish I could take everything back. Start over new. You can't change the past. All I can do is apologize and shuffle on. I'm tired of being cynical. I've seen dark things, been to terrible places. I miss the simple carefree times. I miss love.
It's really kind've funny in ways. I became the embodiment of shady. No more. My vices are the past. I miss old friends that I pushed away with indifference.
Never again.
I quit smoking. My 21st birthday was a good marking point.
Got a free two year membership to powerhouse gym. I work out three times a week now.
I work out of a college algebra book in my free time to get my brain back to functioning. I still suck at math, heh.
I need to get college over with so I can get out of this state. I'll be here a few years.
Any old friends out there, feel free to give me a call. It's been a long ass time.
(616)970-5689 cell
No Regrets. Don't look back. Give it your all.
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2006 5 March :: 1.08 am
:: Mood: crazy
:: Music: Lost Prophets - Shinobi VS Dragon Ninja
Waffle Ironed Cheese Cakes
I am the Dungeon Master.
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2006 3 February :: 8.04 pm
In the next ten years or so...
I've been thinking alot lately for a plan in my life...and I think I've found something I want to do.
I'm not really concerned with girls anymore. Too much of a pain in the ass right now. What I want to do would be really destroyed by having a girlfriend.
What I want to do is work for the next two years and save up a good amount of money...say....8k or more in a long-term growth fund and save up around 1k in a savings account. I'll use this money to purchase gear and or plan tickets as needed, as well as a contract with a storage place to store my shit and car for a few years.
When I've amassed a nice small fortune (enough to restart life in the U.S. comfortably, i.e. rent an apartment, have gas, food, etc. til I get a job again) I'll start my travel out of the U.S. to explore.
I've realized I really don't want to live my life without a story. Without accomplishing something special to me. To me, that's exploring the world and not watching it through a two inch thick plate of glass all the time. There are some places that I really want to go see and some villages I'd want to visit.
I think it'd be cool to visit some of these villages where government doesn't even exist as well as see how un-corporationed (new word) countries and peoples live.
Before I leave though, I really need to plan where I'm going and shit...I don't want to plan it all though...I want there to be some struggle (where's the next meal coming from, how will I get to point B, etc.) but I'll have some money set aside in savings to get me a plane ticket home to my nest egg if shit gets tight.
There are quite a few skills I want to learn first before I'd leave too. I have alot of preparing to do. I want to learn to skateboard, and speak italian or french semi-fluently. I need to get a hacki-sack because no matter what language you speak, a simple game is the easiest way yo make friends. I need to work on my map reading skills as well. I want to start jogging to get ready for the trip.
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2006 3 February :: 7.57 pm
These past two days have been a success. Paid off rent, figured out how to use the Grand Rapids bus system which conviently runs from where I live to anywhere in Grand Rapids...which I have a plan to get free rides using a doctored college I.D. I jumped my car successfully by myself and applied at St.Mary's hospital to hopefully get that position Spielmaker told me about. I'd enjoy getting a job there because I could use the bus system and save like....108 in car insurance a month as well as like....80-100 bucks in gas a month.
Oh well, I can only hope and wait. I plan on selling my old car soon and getting a newer model. Hopefully a 2002 or something. Shouldn't be too terribly long. Ivan is doing well.
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2006 12 January :: 3.46 pm
Going to Flint this weekend. -.- I don't really want to go but I guess we're partying for the weekend. I've really had enough partying. I want one night where I can...I don't know...maybe sleep for 7 or 8 hours. That'd be great. With all that being said...I guess all energy flows to the whims of the great magnet.
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2006 7 January :: 5.15 pm
So, I'm going to the movie hostel tonight with my friend Kimber. I don't know what to expect tonight. Everything has seemed iffy. I know that my roommate is dragging me on some road trip next weekend to meet a bunch of his boys. Kind've nervous there but...I guess "buy the ticket, take the ride".
So I've taken three tests on the G.E.D. out of the 5 required. I'm waiting for my transcripts so far but I have this feeling I aced them. Completely. They were so simple, I actually completed two of the tests in less time than it took to do one. Only 5 minutes less...but less. I can't wait to take the other two tests.
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2006 4 January :: 6.49 pm
Yessss. This weekends what I've been waiting for for such a long time. I've got a busy ass weekend ahead of me. Work til Friday, three seperate days of GED testing, taking someone out for dinner and a movie friday or saturday night depending on bowling friday night. Even with as much money as I make now there are some suprise costs that're making me wonder if I should use my savings for college...I really don't want to do that but I don't want to resort back to certain ways to obtain paper.
I'll figure it out somehow. I did last month. It's officially been a month since we moved into the new place. We have all our bills not only paid, but ahead of time. We're even set for two more months thanks to someone. *Rubs knuckles on shirt front* Yeah, all in a days work...literally. Terell is getting a new car, and giving me his old one. I don't really know if I want it, because I'd have to fix up the bumper, but his insurance is paying that off and it's the only damage on it. The car is in great shape and it's got alot of engine power. If I take it, I'm going to clean up my current car and hand it off to Stacy.
It runs just fine but sometimes the gears slip. The transmission fluid is fine but that just means the actual tranny has something wrong with it, and needs to get looked at.
Well, time to kick Darkness's ass in chess.
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2005 25 December :: 12.27 pm
So I went to the Grandparents last night. It was actually alright this year. I'm a little more interested in football than I used to be which was nill. I sat around and commented on the game with my cousin Terry, then we went down and I got my ass whipped in pool. It was a fine Christmas Eve.
My roommate gets back in about 3 hours so I gotta figure out something to do tonight. I was thinking about going to the Intersection. No clue. Maybe I'll just go pick some things up for the New Years Party...*shrug*.
I have to figure out how to move my bench to my apartment too....using my car -.-. I really am just tooooo lazy to take it apart but I think I'll have too. It won't fit otherwise. I really don't want to deal with it but it's gotta get done sometime. Anyways, Torrell said he'll weightlift with me, so it's nice having someone who'll actually keep up.
Yeah, that one was directed at you Tony. I'm just kiddin buddy. I hope you have a Merry Christmas man. All of you actually. I hope all of you, yes, everyone, has a Merry Christmas.
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2005 20 December :: 5.32 pm
Life's a Party.
My boy Torrell and I drove around getting parts to fix his cars heat for around 2 hours. On the way back we decided to pick up a pizza since both of us really didn't feel like cookin. As we were fixing his car out in the parking lot, a blonde girl around 5'7" with outrageously blue eyes stopped by our car and asked us if we lived in the complex.
Turns out she's our neighbor upstairs and her names Danya *raises eyebrow*. She invited us up for beer and we ended up chillin and talking for a few hours. It was some pretty cool shit. I guess I ended up eating half the pizza and I don't really remember it. Hm. One of those weird things that's going to lead to something bigger I think.
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2005 14 December :: 2.40 pm
Just got my wisdom teeth surgically removed about 5 hours ago. Doing okay, doesn't really hurt, just sore. I have Vicadin at least. but the numbness is really wearing off.
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2005 10 December :: 5.45 pm
Party at my new apartment next Saturday. Only a select few though. So if you're a hot young thang and would like to party down with two young single guys, drop a line.
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2005 2 December :: 4.52 pm
Guess who's got a new apartment. That's right. I just have to wait a week until it opens up but it'll be tight. I already have the down payment and first months rent all handled. I'm leasing it with my buddy Torrell. It's a two bedroom at Old Orchard apartments. Well I never know what to say at the end and usually just leave it hanging so this is the last sentence I'm going to type. I promise.
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2005 12 November :: 10.23 am
I woke up Sunday morning with no way to hold my head that didn't hurt.
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2005 3 November :: 7.18 pm
"Harold, it's Bateman, Patrick Bateman. You're my lawyer so I think you should know: I've killed a lot of people. Some girls in the apartment uptown uh, some homeless people maybe 5 or 10 um an NYU girl I met in Central Park. I left her in a parking lot behind some donut shop. I killed Bethany, my old girlfriend, with a nail gun, and some man uh some old faggot with a dog last week. I killed another girl with a chainsaw, I had to, she almost got away and uh someone else there I can't remember maybe a model, but she's dead too. And Paul Allen. I killed Paul Allen with an axe in the face, his body is dissolving in a bathtub in Hell's Kitchen. I don't want to leave anything out here. I guess I've killed maybe 20 people, maybe 40. I have tapes of a lot of it, uh some of the girls have seen the tapes. I even, um... I ate some of their brains, and I tried to cook a little. Tonight I, uh, I just had to kill a LOT of people. And I'm not sure I'm gonna get away with it this time. I guess I'll uh, I mean, ah, I guess I'm a pretty uh, I mean I guess I'm a pretty sick guy. So, if you get back tomorrow, meet me at Harry's Bar, so you know, keep your eyes open."
...beautiful
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2005 14 October :: 9.16 pm
I'm thinking this coming Wednesday or Thursday I want to go to the Hookah Lounge. Anyone interested?
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