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:: 2018 3 January :: 12.51 pm
:: Mood: pained
:: Music: Beck - Dreams

Immeasurable Pain
I don't even know. It all hurts. I'm in so much pain just from my skin. And I think that part if not a lot of it is in my head, or my head making the big deal. Ever since I read that eczema was more like toxins are pushing out through my skin from the inside, I can't not feel it that way. Every stab is more of like a stab out. It's like I can feel these spiked terrible things ripping their way out of me.

I'm looking up techniques for breathing and supplements. I keep forgetting little things to do for it.

Was it always like this? It wasn't though..... Were all those periods of time when it was 'okay' just when I was eating literally nothing? How is it all over my face now when it's never been before if not because now I think it can be on my face? "It's not on my face. It's not on my face. It's not on my face."

Typing this seems to help. A good distraction.

Oh, I should take these supplements now...

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:: 2017 27 December :: 3.33 pm
:: Mood: accomplished

Take a Step
Journaling is the big new skill I want to work on. I want a record of my thoughts and experiences, what the world was like for me each step of the way. And I want to write down what I remember from the past. And think through the things happening.

Every little step is still a step forward.

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