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thedarkerside (profile) wrote,
on 6-29-2003 at 1:33am
Current mood: Questionable
Music: [x]trapt- still frame
Subject: Mirror Image

I sit here, looking at myself in the mirror and I cant except whats staring back at me. I see a girl afraid to be herself. Afraid to be anything in fear of rejection. In fear of being alone. Fear of misconception and being misunderstood. All out of fear. Given herself 14 years to figure out who she is. if its taken this long to figure out some sense, any thing that would make sense to her life, then how long will it take to find the answer? The world is too big for her to conquor. She hides behind her own shadows just to protect herself from pain but always ends up getting hurt anyways. She finds herself wishing for something else but what isnt quite sure what she wants. She does know that she is dethly concerned with her image to the point where she'd do anything to improve it. Theres always a constant reminder that shes not good enough for the outside world. She sees life as a pathetic human food chain thats only based on impressing other people to even get anywhre in life. Its true. Like a flower, she'll never be pretty enough, she will never last forever, her petals will never be silky enough, and she ends up dieing and getting thrown away or left out on a hard surface to wilt. So maybe i'm just afraid of myself. Afriad of how to feel. But I am the girl in the mirror. Atleast i'm not afraid to admit that.
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sheels21489

06-29-03 12:59pm

I like this entry

Very deep and inspiring

There are a lot og people who love you for who you are. Don't change yourself for others but only for yourself.

Again, very good entry

I love you

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intensify

06-29-03 4:39pm

Sheely, that's touching and all, but I have an opinion of my own... Something that might help Amy decide what to do. So, Amy, listen closely..

You may seem confused about who you are... I am, too. But that's only because there are so many things going on around us, so many different personalities that we envy, so many.. If you are like me, then you like so many of them you can't pick just one to mimic.. But where the truth lies is our childhood. By the age of 2 children usually come into their own.. By that I mean they start showing what kind of person they are. [ That's why Parents call it "Terrible Two's" lol ]. So really all along, we've known who we are all along.. But it's when we are exposed to the real world is when we start becoming unsure. We think we have to act a certain way to get attention from those we envy. Maybe everyone does this, maybe it's just me; Maybe it's both of us. You've known who you are for a long time, Amy. It's just who you want to be that is getting in your way... Stay yourself and don't give a fuck about changing for anything, or most importantly, anyone.

I would like to depict the fact that I also didn't slam all my "theories" on you.. I didn't point any fingers or make you feel like this was your problem.. Because there are others out there, like me, that have this same problem.

Also note that I can give advice, I can analyze people, but I can never help myself. So please, let this help you because of the lack of self-help I can't give myself...

That was long.

(reply to this)

thedarkerside

Re:, 06-29-03 6:37pm

I think there is a truth to your theory ...we must discuss this.

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