| Add Memory | Add To Friends | |
| mle (profile) wrote, on 7-27-2002 at 4:29pm | |
| Current mood: upset, disappointed Music: our lady peace - clumsy (acoustic) Subject: home, sweet fuckin home |
|
yea. so yea. i dont know where to begin. im home, all excited to get away from the west clan for a breather. and what happens? me and the rents fight. right off the bat! im so upset right now... over an hour later (and thats a big deal for me because i forgive/forget super quick). but oh my god! theyre being ridiculous. ok, i just got home round 330 and ill do some wash, clean, go out tonight, and crash cuz we pulled an all nighter last night, like tradition. and church tomorrow, and work. then lifeteen? or going out. then work monday. cheer camp tues-fri afternoon. hell and a half (even though i really wanna go) and they want me to fly to alaska by myself on saturday morning. after 3 1/2 weeks of sleep deprivation, cheer camp and 12-mile hikes. HELL NO! ok, the jet lag would kill me! id fly out to alaska for 3 days and then fly home! ridiculous! my other option? go stay w/ my aunt cheryl in ada friday-thursday (after cheer camp). um, ok... ive been having public living problems for 3 outta the past 4 weeks and i just want to be home alone! is that too much to ask! plus, id be with a 6 and 4 year old, and i wouldnt be able to work and i could only go out like 2 times! ridiculous! im so pissed! why cant i just stay home and have my other aunt (who lives a block away) just check up on me to make sure im not having parties?! seriously! AHHHHHHH this reminds me of the night at devils tower, where i talked to my mom for 20 minutes, called her back later and bawled on the phone w/ her for another 30 minutes, then got up at 530 the next morning to call my dad. and he made it sound like everything would work out ok and theyd be more open to the options. open to options, my ass! theyre being totally irrational! im gonna lose it just *thinking* about it, much less *doing* it! ok.. a break from that... how about a nice little chat about guys? like, grooms who was half raping/stalking me the entire trip. yea, hes cool and all, but im not interested, and i lead him on simply because the guys i drooled over on the trip (todd... mmmm yummy) just run home to their perfect little girlfriends awaiting at home. i could never even compare to people like kathleen schaut and mandie freeman or any of those girls. and then nyenhuis, lol. hes such a cutie and sweetie. i havent hung out w/ him since cheer for basketball when he drove me around. its so adorable cuz hes got that grade-school crush thing going on. but thats the thing - its so grade school! and it drives me crazy! hed never even *think* of touching me, so i cant help but kinda dismiss him - im not all cute and innocent like that. but i feel bad. idk. im too picky i think. no im not. i compromise because im not good enough. i dont know the coolest part of the whole trip was getting a chance to talk to danielle. id been thinkin bout it for forever, buti just never got around to it because there were opprotunities. im so glad i did though. she helped me a lot, whether or not she knew it. i was so incredibly good wednesday-friday. :) big big smile! huge! but friday and today it totally went to shit. and im pissed. but good news... i think i lost weight :) i couldnt wear my gray shorts before the trip and now theyre kinda big... i cant wait till tomorro wmorning to weigh myself... hehehehe. :) but i need to go. shower and take care of some shit before i see whats goin on tonight. try to avoid the rents... grr.. ill write more later. i got lots to say. mle |
|
| Post A Comment |
spud | 07-27-02 11:34pm if it were me, and i was given the options; i would go to alaska. it would be rough on the sleep schedule and stuff. but hey. there have to be benefits. you would still probably have alone time on the plane and stuff. with young cousins it's 24/7. young cousins are rough stuff, if you ask me. granted, you just went out west. and flew, i presume, so i don't blame you for wanting to hang home. but you can't blame your folks for not trusting you either. but that's not the point. the situation is where it is, and you have to figure out the path of least resistance. follow the electricity/water theory. go with the flow. take the path of least resistance. don't resist gravity. find the easiest way to cope with it. because gravity won't change. but there are ways of working with it. but then again, humans are dumb about stuff like that. bipedal locomotion is most illogical.
|