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sadsongsnmyhead87 (profile) wrote,
on 10-26-2003 at 4:06pm
Current mood: gloomy
Music: Epiphany by StainD
Hm...seems that I'm always listening to a song... - -;; okay, so get this. I feel depressed, but I don't know what about. I feel like dying, yet I don't. It's times like these when I want to just lock myself up in my room and stuff. I dunno. After my band rehearsal today, one of my friends asked me if I was okay. I couldn't answer 'cause I didn't know. Maybe I'm being ignorant to myself. I hate m'self, and that's all I can say. Here's a piece of my actual journal entry, in this one notebook I keep.

"...I don't hate life. I just hate myself. Other people shouldn't be penalized for my issues. It's on the outside where everyone can see that I seem fine, and my life is as good as it gets. Complimented on skills I was not good at, even when I didn't do anything to improve i.e. music and writing. Friends who actually seem to care. Respect from people who I thought hated me last year. But, it's on the inside where a too much of a good thing is a bad thing. Everything is so great that-that it makes me sick. I feel that none of this is for me. It's for someone else..."

...and so on. I don't know. So confused. And for some reason, my hands won't stop shaking. I've got issues. No one needs to tell me that anymore. Well, there's my second entry of the the day. Till 2moro, hopefully, L8terZ
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fuzzball203

10-26-03 6:36pm

OH MY GOD!!!! ARE YOU KIDDING?! SARAH YOU GOT ONE!!! YAH!!!!!

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