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| werealljaded (profile) wrote, on 11-9-2003 at 8:24pm | |
| Current mood: satisfied Music: Goldfinger Subject: what memories are made of... |
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| well, last night was homecomming. i have no complaints at all, it was actually an awesome night. i had work until 3, then i went and bought some jewlry and picked GC up on my way home. he hung out at my house while i got ready-it was cute seeing him talk ot my parents and just chill at my house. my sister did my hair, and (sorry Amy), but i didn't like it all that much. but i didn't really care all that much, who cares about hair anyways? i felt like a ninja. hehe sad but true. you know how they have the big bun on top of their head with the sticks hanging out...well i had half my hair in a bun with strands of hair sticking up. ah, who cares? we went to the melting pot for dinner. i am still trying to decide which i found more fun, dinner or the dance. the reason i loved dinner so much is because it was just the two of us so we could really talk and hang out alone. the dance was awesome, but he was with the few guys he does know most of the night. i didn't mind, it was good b/c i didn't feel like i had to hang by him every second of the night since he knew people too. the thing i liked most about the night was how affectionate he was towards me. it was the first time he's ever held my hand and even *kissed* me in front of other people. well, i guess his secret (me) is out now. lol. i mean everyone knows that we like each other, but only one person knew that we've kissed. but i loved how his hand kept finding mine, and he kept pulling me closer to him. he was very....cupplish? all night. i've never really been into that. the whole public display of affection crap. usually i hate it. my ex (branden) used to get so mad at me b/c when we were at shows and stuff i would be like get the F off of me, lol. but with GC i don't mind it at all. ah, and he's so cute. he looked so good last night all dressed up. and we had so much fun. i know that he really liked dinner and i am glad he had a good time at the dance. i forgot who it was, but i remember someone i know last night saying "how'd you get him"...i was thinking, what the hell do you mean by that. that's one thing i don't want. i don't want people thinking, why is he with her? he could do better....you know what i mean? why is it that I am the lucky ong to be with HIM? why can't He be the lucky one to be with ME? lol. i know i am just being dumb. this sucks, i am starting to like him a lot. maybe a little to much. i am starting ot depend on him being there. i didn't want to let myself get into anythign that would hurt if taken away. well, too late. Stephanie, you've done it again. you've set yourself up for another heartache.....i went to the Matrix today and in it, one of the lines was...with all beginnings must come an end. well, it might be great now, but how much is it going to suck when it ends? but i am just getting wayy ahead of myself here. for all i know, this won't go any further then whatever it is we have now. arg...what is it that we have now? he says he really likes me and cares for me and would be really hurt if i did anythign with any other guys...yet we're not going out? i mean, i guess we're dating, but what would change if we gave it a title...NOTHING. but i guess that's not important, who cares about a label? i wish i thought that was true. before now i always hated that labeling crap. but now i kinda want it. i guess i am totally over my huge fear of commitment that has made me push soo many guys away in the past. but, what has changed? is it me or him that makes me want somethien serious? |
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painttheskywithstars | You rizock., 11-14-03 3:14am "but i loved how his hand kept finding mine"
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