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| Randomperson (profile) wrote, on 11-13-2003 at 11:53am | |
| Current mood: exhausted Music: "Easier to Run" ~LP |
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| This may end up sounding shallow. I sincerely can't express my frustration in the way I want to... Why do I seem to attract the girls that I don't want to have to deal with? I mean Katie went crazy just because i said Hi to her when she was having a bad day, and that took well over a month to get it to the point she wasn't telling bad stories behind my back because i wouldn't go out with her. (Insecure, possible Bulemic... wouldn't doubt it) Then there's Megan... (insecure, possible abuse, always apologetic, highly likely depressed) She always tells me all of her problems, and I get sick of hearing these bad stories, because they're brought upon by herself. Plus, she refuses to fix her problems, like her inability to do what she wants (instead she acts the slave to what everyone thinks. Her philosophy is that she has to have everyone like her, so she must sumbit to their devious and degrading comments and be utterly demeaned to the lowest possible level). So, I get to hear about this nightly. She sent me a note saying she wanted to go back to "the way we were before" and admitted she knows she's insecure, etc. (she says that all the time but really doesn't come to grips with it) What she wants to go back to, I don't know. I'd love to go back to before she started telling me all of her problems, but I can't ignore these things, like her kind of being abused at home, her inability to come to grips with her problems, and her possible depression. Like I usually do, I easily find a song to fit my mood and situation. Today it's "Easier to Run" by Linkin Park. "Just watching you sigh, all of the helplessness inside/ pretending I don't feel this waste, It's so much simpler then shame/ It's easier to run, replacing this pain with something more/It's easier to go then face all this pain, you, all alone." I'm out. |
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jburt1 | 11-14-03 12:19am Nice connection of that song to your life. It's commendable that you can openly say these things about your "friends" (if that's who they are) and not feel guilty for it. But I don't blame you...I know how much it sucks to listen to other people's problems 24/7. |
Randomperson | Re:, 11-14-03 12:01pm Yeah, I feel only a small bit of remorse for expressing my opinion... I really should not, because it's my opinion, and am free to express it. The only think that I have a problem with is the results that may come of it... With Katie, every time I say something not totally neutral like "Hi", she takes it offensively. I really like this journal and community because I know that everyone who reads this aren't couriers for my thoughts, taking them straight back to to, say, Katie. So, I can't say I'm fully commendable, besides openly saying stuff.
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