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| robbingnovember (profile) wrote, on 11-14-2003 at 10:19pm | |
| Current mood: hellish Subject: I wish no one in my place |
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| fuck. I am so sick of myself. verge of throwing up. I'm about to have another anxiety attack again. I just feel so helpless all the time. All i do is drift around, a shell of my former self (which wasnt that great to begin with). I dont even see the point of existing. and i thought i could avoid crying tonight. I just want to be normal like everyone else and be happy. I don't even see a light in the tunnel.. it's pitch black for miles. Maybe it's just a cave, not a tunnel at all. I don't even see the point of making an effort, because i know i can't get better on my own. I'm so fucking exhausted. I'm not mad at anyone at all. It's not anyones fault.. it's mine for being who i am. I hate being me. I hate it. I abhor it. I am the most vile creature on this planet and i deserve exactly what i get. said it's not your fault and you've been good to me. it's just lately i've been feeling like i dont belong, like the grounds not mine to walk upon ----- [later:.. yeah im working my way towards recovery.. one step at a time. ill go to sleep feeling okay today] |
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wannabe | 11-15-03 12:57am "I am the most vile creature on this planet"
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| Sargonnis | Re:, 11-15-03 1:01am Pretty much what Stacey said. You are too hard on yourself, it - a general it for everything you are blaming on yourself - is not your fault. Blame someone else, fuel the fire, and then realize you are better than you thought/think. You CAN technically skip the first two steps, but that sucks the fun out of it. |
dprincesss11 | 11-15-03 11:40am sarah, you are amazing, but no matter how many people tell you that, it won't make a difference unless you can see it, or until you want to see it. sick dreams are the best, but even better with me in them! (minus ASTC hehe) <3 you |