Add Memory | Add To Friends
DarkSwordDancer (profile) wrote,
on 11-17-2003 at 9:02pm
Current mood: confused
Subject: The fire of a soul is not easily put out by a single breeze.
..i didnt get to sleep last night till midnight and then when i woke up i felt a canyon of fire and tears in my heart and wanted despretly to cry.I wanted to cry for all my trust gone and just to cry to vent....im not going tro school tomarrow cause im sick..im going to study like always and pretend to be ok cause if my parents suspect something happened i got to a shrink and i dont want to. I feel so numb and yet so....lost...like im in a room filled with bright white light and no color but the room isnt a room its more like a plain of just existing.But its a painfull existence....i dont know...i feel like....like i dont know what i feel...i make so much sense.

i feel like screaming or laughing ...i need to go see the ocean or a rain forest...i feel good as a person there like im at peace with myself and nothing can touch me....thats what i think i need..not to touch anyone and not for anyone to touch me.
Post A Comment

Jessika

Shirt!, 11-17-03 9:25pm

Kinna like the shirt I was wearing today? Like you are in perfect color(even though Eeyore is only blue) and the world around you is in gray and black? The world around is just kind of dead.

(reply to this)

DarkSwordDancer

Re: Shirt!, 11-17-03 9:26pm

yeah kida only its not that its dead more like non existant

(reply to comment)

Jessika

Re: Re: Shirt!, 11-17-03 9:32pm

Ooooooo YaY!!! I was actually close for once!!!!! ^_^

(reply to comment)

silversoldier

..., 11-18-03 11:42pm

Hawaii did give us all some sort of purpose...

But that last thing you said really bothers me now... See, our history class just finished watching Elizabeth (the virgin queen) ... yeah... she basically said that right before she put on the porcelain make up and decided to be the icon of the Anglican Church... and the movie is really disturbing in many ways, and life is.... AND I FUCKING HATE IT AT CMR!!!!! I can't find a group that is anything like the old group.... just feeling like a lost soul now.... I think I should go see the psych .... I need to scare someone right now....

(reply to this)

DarkSwordDancer

Re: ..., 11-19-03 7:09pm

o.o im now i phyco queen..oh well yes i know its hard but one must press on or else all is lost.Dont worry all shall be better at some point.....and its true......hawaii did give us all some sort of purpose.

(reply to comment)