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| brokenmentality (profile) wrote, on 12-5-2003 at 3:25pm | |
| Music: Taking Back Sunday-cute without the e |
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| well i guess this is my first entry.. its about time...... So how have i been...... hmmmmmmmm i feel like i can never do anything right. Everything i do ends up hurting somebody else... it really sucks. I feel like such an idiot. All i ever do is wish i did things differently and regret the decisions i make. I just really fucked up... alot. I thought it was the right thing and now i dont think it was. Everytime i think about it i wanna scream. i hate everything about life... i really do. I went to youth group last night hoping that maybe it would clear things up a bit.. it made me feel a little bit better. Im just gonna jump more into christianity and get more involved. I feel like god doesnt listen to me. I cant do this alone...... but its like hes testing my faith. So i guess i'll put my life in his hands from now on. Im going on a missions trip to alaska in july... im really looking forward to it. I wish "this" was the only problem in my life. But everyday a new one comes up and i cant handle them all. I sit in my room and just cry sometimes because theres nothing else i can do. I got this book called god speaks and that keeps me busy. Or when im doing something it keeps my mind off everything thats going on.... then i stop thinking and it just pops into my mind. I did something i really shouldnt have..... Fuck...... I shouldnt be alloud to make my own decisons. I cant even pick something out of the fucking vending machine without stressing about it... i love being so pathetic... |
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.j.e.s.s. | 12-05-03 6:05pm <3 <3 <3 <3!!! ARGHGHGHH i wish we had a class together and ehhehhhhhhhhhh i need to just talk with you ... well i just hope everything is okay... sounds like stuff sucks, but i hope you're okay. And hey, i'm going on a mission trip (probably anyway) to North Carolina... anyway... just felt like telling you that, since you are. well... i'm thinkging about calling you but i dont know your new number. So i guess that screws that idea.
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brokenmentality | Re:, 12-05-03 9:32pm thanks, cuz you always care and i know its genuine and not all fake. Just so you know my new number is 3437.... i just told it to everyone.. lol... but ah well. Mission trips are great...... lol
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