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| drowning-in-you (profile) wrote, on 12-17-2003 at 1:37pm | |
| Current mood: one step up from depressed...lol Music: library noises...nothing...ha Subject: oh boy here we go again! |
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| so yeah this week has been such a bad week...term paper is due for mac friday, muscle analysis due tomorrow...haven't started anything yet (of course, it's cuz i'm an Alaniz you know...lol)...i've been so stressed out from band, homework, the radio, trying to sell tickets (which if you'd like to buy any raffle tickets, email me & i'll give you more info-only $1!)...& i'm surprised joey still stays with me after this week...i've gotten into multiple fights with danny too...i had thought of for a long time of the possiblity of ever getting back with danny after high school more than likely but i've realized we've both fucked it up for both of us...too many fights, too many bad memories...there were good ones too, but still, pain outwieghs happiness in my terms...so yeah we got in a stupid fight lastnight & i hit him so hard...i just wanted to tell him how much i hate him & how i wish i'd never met him...but i would've lied...i don't regret going out with him or anything, don't regret losing my "precious gift" to him, don't regret getting in trouble cuz i lied to my dad to have to go out with him...it's not that...sometimes ppl say things just to be the bigger person...& i hate that bout myself...i got a complement lastnight when joey dropped me off @ my house after work...he told me that he envied me...cuz i have compassion for others...cuz i can be friends with my ex's & actually try to be there for them, when usually we see in society that once the relationship is over, they erase every memory of them...i can't be like that...we had an arguement today & to see him fall was to be the highlight of the day, yet when i got into class i cried like a pansy...so did he i was told...i hate to be so mean, i really do...but the fact of the matter is that i don't think we'd ever be able to go back there again...who knows...but know that this doesn't mean that i'm breaking up with joey...oh HELLS NO!!!...he's been good enough to be patient with me & i admire him for that really...i think the only problem is that his family gives him insecurities...i guess his mom isn't really happy with me cuz i still hang out with & talk to danny...but sorry he's still my friend, even though sometimes i wish i could pull out his heart through his asshole (i'm sorry, i was joking with that, but it came out way too graphic, so i apoligize if anyone was offended or if i've triggered anyone's upchuck reflex...lol)...so yeah i got that going for me...hee hee... i feel tons better cuz i'm typing so fast right now, it's really incredable...i haven't been on a computer for a while now...hopefully i can get a computer for xmas...YEAH RIGHT...so anyways, well hope everyone has a good rest of the week & if i'm not back by then, have a great Christmas Holiday... :D |
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| Anonymous | 12-18-03 12:43am thats too bad, that you had a bad week end. thats kinda crazy how you hurt ur ex. If I were him, Id cry too!well you must be pretty strong to hurt others like that. Well hope you feel better, or at least your ex. |
drowning-in-you | Re:, 12-18-03 2:07pm dude, i guess thanx...lol...who is this?...are you the same person who commented last time?...SHOW YOURSELF DAMMIT!!! |