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| robbingnovember (profile) wrote, on 12-20-2002 at 10:39pm | |
| Current mood: truly dead inside Music: ' you know you can't stay mad at the setting sun' Subject: listening to the same old song |
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| "I just want to be something, I just want to be someone, someone who would stand out in a crowd, mother would be proud, something to someone" Well, every two or so weeks i get sad. I cry a lot. Yesterday and kinda today. (the grounds not mine to walk upon) At keiths.. not that anyone noticed. Have you ever felt invisible "so please forvive what i have done, ya know you can't stay mad at the setting sun, WE all get tired i mean eventually there is nothing left to do but sleep" I mean really. so many a time i feel like if i left , ya know just walked out of a room, if anyone would notice or even come after me. They couldn't possibly concern themselves with the effort of getting up. Follow me off a bridge. If u meet me at the bottom it will be too late i would have already drowned alone. I guess i am dead already anyways. I mean why? why am i so alone all the time. In a crowded room. I don't think going to keiths was bad.. better then going to gothic friday central. It just made me realize.. again. How i am taken for granted . and how no one listens I know i get sad a lot but it doesn't mean my feelings don't mean anything. Listen for once. No one notices anything. I didn't talk for about an hour. No one said ' why are u being so quiet' people noticed that i was sad but did they even get off their ass to ask me whats wrong to try. If you 'love' me like you say you do, why don't you act like it. ever? ever????? and i feel so numb and i feel like i don't care and i feel like i could just end it all if i wasn't afraid of pain. ( no i think i take that back kinda) I guess i am not that depressed but i mean I'm not so happy. i need to get attention. something. Look at me goddamit i am bleeding internally, yet i am getting so pale i might fade away. I can hardly see myself anymore Auto response from blueyed717: ...talking to the greatest person who has ever stepped foot on this planet its nice to know someone cares. I've been missing sara all night. I don't think she'd leave me to drown in my tears. whatever sorry i am a burden to everyone |
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| Anonymous | 12-21-02 8:04am sarah.. you are beautiful.. dont be sad. i used to get sad every few weeks last year.. now i'm happy. remember your friends and who loves you.. i know that sara loves you, just look at her away msg, stacey loves you, and dana loves you.. and i love you, too. i dont like seeing you sad.. i've read some entries and you always seem upset.. acknowledge + recognize your friends.. count your blessings.. not your faults. this world is too beautiful to sit around all day and cry.. i used to cry a lot.. but seriously there is no reason to cry. if you cry because of a problem.. realize that any problem can be solved.. no matter how hard.. and if you cry because of regrets.. realize that you are human, you make mistakes, have no shame, forgive, apologize, + move on..
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robbingnovember | Re:, 12-21-02 9:21am i like you anonymous note giver .. thanks. |
Anonymous | Re: Re:, 12-21-02 6:42pm no problem love.. are you smiling yet? =D |
robbingnovember | Re: Re: Re:, 12-21-02 7:32pm actually yes.. today was wonderful |