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| thedarkerside (profile) wrote, on 1-6-2003 at 8:44pm | |
| Current mood: crushed Music: none Subject: none |
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| I dont know whats wrong with me. I almost started crying in public for like the first time. I am crying now. I want so much just for my mom to love me or atleast show that she cares. It has taken me a long time but I think I'm ready to say it.. I dont love my mom. And I'm not just saying that I'm dead serious. Shes not a bump in the road of my life...shes more of a large pot hole that takes up my whole road. She just constantly makes me thinkg i'm dirt. I've lost 8 pounds...part of dieting/not eating/exercising. I asked her if I lost alot of weight if I could get new clothes and she said: "I'll believe it when I see it". She doesnt know big loosing weight is a priority to me. What I ate today: stir fry chineese for dinner thats it. I reallly want to make myself perfect call it anorexic if you will. Call it depression too. I've thought about how it would be if i wernt here...many times. I'm not loved. Thats all I want ...to be loved and to be susscessful..I dont want to be alone.. I'd go crazy if I was alone. | |
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Rob | I know were not the best of friends...., 01-07-03 10:13pm I can relate to that very well, That feeling sux,and I am still having troubles w/ it but hang in there Ok? |
thedarkerside | Re: I know were not the best of friends...., 01-08-03 7:14pm your responce means alot to me..no one had the balls to say anything when i need reasurance the most. |
snowbunnyjcd | Amy darling..., 01-09-03 5:42pm Hey Amy. I wanna first off thanks so much for the awsome comment you wrote to me! Your to sweet. I'd just wanted to say that God made everyone the way they were supposed to be and he made them beatiful. You are obvisiouly havent given up hope yet, because everyday you look beatiful with your hair done and your makeup done. You obvisiouly care about yourself enough to do that. Unlike Rob, I can relate to your feelings. I am/was pro mia (bullemic) and I'm trying to recover from it, but its hard and part of me doesnt wanna stop. I'm srry if I sound shallow but I'm only trying to help. Just remember God made you the way he wanted you to look, and in God's eyes and everyone eleses eyes, you are beatiful, not matter what you or n e one else thinks! |
CrinnyCaroo | Hey!!, 01-10-03 7:19pm I know I haven't been there for you when you probably need me most, but I am going to there for you from now on. You can count on me. I love you!!! |