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| Twitchy (profile) wrote, on 4-14-2004 at 5:07pm | |
| Current mood: depressed Music: Lake of Fire from Comin' Down, Meat Puppets Subject: Another Day |
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| I always get back from school feeling like crap I go there and I'm ... just background I'm isolated, very few people even care what happens to me I am abshed and insulted and riddiclued and insulted in many forms. Called a fag, steryotyped as a goth, persecuted for religious beliefs, just plain hated, called a moron, or just hated because I'm quiet and alienated It's all their fault ... they're the ones who turned me away ... they're the people who never really accepted me and now they constantly grow more hatred for me because of my furthering alienation In short, most poeple have forced me into being alone, in hiding, into being a shut in, and every day they all hate me a little more for being alone, then the just feel the need to hate me, fear me .... It's a vicious cycle and I don't really see where it started, how it works or how it will end ... but it's there Thing is that I don't care what they think, it's just that all my life I've been in the firing line of hate and alienation and so I've been taught that I am what they say I am I have come to believe everything they say about me ... I hate that I hate myself for no better reason than that everyone else seems to have a problem with who I am All I want is not to feel that, and for them to jsut leave me be ... not to come home all alone with a throbing headache form six and a half hours of hell ... to just be able to sit down and think "wow, that was a decent day" it's to much for me to ask I know, if I cannot help myself how can anyone help me? to those who care, Tori, Kalie, Cyler ... thank you ... thank you so very much |
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s-m-i-l-e | 04-15-04 9:25pm those people who spend there lifes cutting down people, will never get the chance to really see the light in anything, the thing is mark, they might go on and do that, but always remember you are always better than them, and it will always affect you what they do it would affect anyone, but if you dont let it get to you, but i will talk to you later about this i have some things to tell you |