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| aushpog (profile) wrote, on 4-25-2004 at 1:42pm | |
| Current mood: tranquil Music: our love is loud Subject: HOMESICK |
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| remembering something made me want to write about it. kelley (my "sister") and her little girl mia, almost two, visited several weeks ago. kelley is just amazing - i can talk to her about anything, from girl stuff to god stuff. she was driving me to church before leaving to go back home and we were talking about god and stuff, and she was talking about moving. she said that they were probably going to end up moving sometime because joel's job is just a starter, and she said if she could move anywhere, she would move back here again. she said she was kind of homesick - all her friends live here and she grew up here. but then she was like, "you know, i want to come back here because i love it so much, but i know i'm supposed to be homesick for heaven." that just brought me back to peace with god, and i thought about how true it was; we're not supposed to love this place we're living in as much as we're supposed to love our eternal home. that's just so true, and it's why we need to let go of the things we have on earth, in this world. i just want to see jesus. when i see him, i want to run right into his arms and hug him forever, and i want to praise him and talk to him and hug him some more and tell him how much i love him and tell him he's always been my soulmate, that i was destined to see him and love him. i can't wait until i can go to another world devoid of problems and hatred and all the uneasiness we tend to feel in this world. heaven will not be bmw's and money and mall-of-americas and cakes and candy and mansions and physical beauty. it will be complete fulfillment and satisfaction that, yes, this is the land of god! we are here together, praising him and living in his almighty presence! forever! eternity is something i just can't fathom. i've tried to imagine it, but i can't. i can't imagine going somewhere forever - i mean, we're all so used to the process of life, of growth and then becoming senile and just going away, being buried in the ground. i sit here in my nice little computer chair and i can't imagine living forever. i mean, think about it - it's just so unreal, that concept. and furthermore, imagine the concept of living forever in a perfect place with the person you love the most, the person you have tried so hard to live for. that says whoa to me. wow - a lot of things on my mind right now! can't wait until celebration sunday, yeah man! well i'm off and preparing for a busy week - chorus rehearsal monday and tuesday, heart's desire or a banquet on wednesday, chorus concert (which will be off the hook) on thursday, and bible study or banquet on friday. and any of those days are possible work days. deep breath! much love, au†umn "when we sing hear our songs to you; when we dance feel us move to you; when we laugh fill our smiles with you. when we lift our voices louder still, can you hear us, can you feel? WE LOVE YOU LORD WE LOVE YOU WE LOVE YOU!" |
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andy | 04-26-04 4:21pm As a current user you only needed to pay a one time fee of $2. I can send you $18 back if you'd like. |
aushpog | Re:, 04-29-04 9:57pm thank you very much for responding - i wouldn't mind you sending back, but if it's troublesome for you, don't worry about it and just send me a hard copy of my journal, if possible. your choice, it actually doesn't matter to me.
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