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| toki (profile) wrote, on 5-2-2004 at 6:30pm | |
| Current mood: pissed off |
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| I need to get out of here. I'm gonna explode. I already have and I'm screwed. I hate my dad. I hate him so much right now. He's the biggest jerk in the world. He's downstairs bitching that I have no sense of responsibility because i don't have a job or a license, I'm a complete and total failure. That all I think about is my friends and theatre, that I'm not focused or anything. Then amanda gets in on it and goes on abotu how I'm 17 and I don't have a job or a license and grrr....You know what? Which daughter is goign to college? Not Amanda. Nope. She has no right to tell me I'm not responsible. She's teh one who slacked off in high school, screwing her over for life. So do you know what I told her? "I'm not the irresponsable one, because atleast I'm going to college" :-P Yeah, I know it's immature, but I really don't care. I've been mature long enough with these people and they've pushed me far enough. I'm not gonna take it anymore. I try to be patient, I really do. There's only so much of this shit that they throw on me that I can handle. My brother was sitting there hitting me and hurting me for ten minutes telling me I'm a failure and that my dad was gonna kill me and that I was fat, ugly, stupid....and I don't know. And I hit him. I admit, I shouldn't have. But I can't take his shit anymore. he's 11 years old. I'm 5 years older then him. Five years and he treats me like I'm a stupid piece of shit and I'm not gonna take it anymore. Now I'm grounded for a month because they pushed me to my limit. I'M grounded because they pushed me so far that I just gave up. Have they ever once thought to back off...maybe it'll all be okay? Maybe I'd be happy to go home and not do anything in my power to avoid coming here. Don't tell me right now that I have no right to complain, I know you probably have it worse. But right now I hate them. And I don't care anymore. I don't fucking care. I need to get out of here. I can't stand this. |
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Anytngbtordinary | 05-02-04 8:02pm Patrice you have every right to scream and swear and cry. You get a lot of shit from your family and it has to be hard. Ive seen how your brother treats you...and you handle it really well...but your brother should not be allowed to treat you that way. AS for your sister...shes doing what every normal sibling does...yell at you and say any possible thing that she knows will make you angry and will make you explode so that you can get in trouble...kenny does it with me and i do it with him.... and yeah i actually hit my brother in california too because i got so mad at him. Im not saying either of us shouldve hit our brothers...but its the way families work sometimes...they push every last nerve of yours. If you really are grounded for a month, you can call me anytime you want... even 3 in the morning...that will be awesome :) I love you Patrice (not in the fellowship way)--we have to bring that saying back! lol-- Well ill get back to my talking to you on IM...you should recieve and email for this in like a minute...
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toki | Re:, 05-02-04 8:07pm :-) thanks jackie...You're right, it's the way families are. But it still sucks. I want to run away, I think I will. I've planned it all, not that I'll ever go through with it. But if I ever felt that I had to, I could.
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