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| moana (profile) wrote, on 5-8-2004 at 2:01pm | |
| Music: beegees - the joke was on me Subject: ouiser |
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| i am the comic relief of life. i was comic relief in every performance, i am the comic relief to most people that know me in real life. generally speaking, i am there to make people laugh, to let them relax a bit, loosen up, and laugh. that's all i'm good for. not really that great for advice, apparently i'm too blunt for consolation. but i will laugh with people, or give them something to laugh about. it's what i exist for. seriously, it's all i exist for. it's all i'm good for. it's kind of sad, but kind of funny. since i was the little kid in second grade, i've been the one cracking jokes, and when no one laughed at the jokes, i was the one jumping off desks to make the kids laugh. that's who i am. it's who i've always been. it's starting to look like it's who i'll always be, ever, for the rest of my life. i can make my peace with that. i've already made my peace with that. that's why i'm always in character. isn't that funny? screw you i find it funny. i guess that's probably why i'm already so sick of people coming up to me going "you're ouiser!" it's not like they're complimenting me on a character i played well, it's like they're condemning me to be this woman. and what's funny is, we decided during our little character study, ouiser is really sad. like she's suffered and stuff. that all that exterior is just defensive. and you'd think after all that character study, they'd realize what they're condemning me to be when they tell me "you're ousier." guess not. who knows? maybe they do know what they're doing to me? i don't know. there seems to be a lot i don't know lately. it's sad. it's funny. isn't it funny? it's close. i'm almost out of things to say. i pride myself in being able to say anything and everything; just like ouiser in a sense. not afraid to speak my mind. but i always end up being the joke, the punchline. it's funny. it makes others laugh. sometimes, it makes me laugh, too. sometimes it makes me want to scream. but i don't scream. i just laugh. it's what i do. it's become who i am. that's funny. i started a joke which got the whole world crying. only i couldn't see that the joke was on me. i look at the sky running my hand over my eyes and i fell out of bed hurting my head on things that she said. i started to cry, which got the whole world laughing. only i couldn't see that the joke was on me. it's a sad song, but it's kind of funny. i find a lot of things funny. i got put back on a small amount of pills again, those little harmless painkillers. just for a little while, and then i won't have to take them ever again. but i think i took too much, because i hurt, and now i'm fine. it's kind of funny. isn't it funny? i think it's funny. |
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hellborn | 05-12-04 1:55pm Eh, I beg to differ.. you give excellent advice. |