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| mizu87 (profile) wrote, on 5-12-2004 at 11:31pm | |
| Current mood: content |
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| Well... I had.. an all too awkward talk.. with Jonny boy... before i forget, i was washing an ashtray and it was cracked and i was washing it and it sliced my finger ^^' my middle left finger xD ha ha like 3 spots! God I couldn't believe it and the damn thing bleed real well too! God it didn't even hurt but damn that blood ^^',\ was cool xD yes shut up! Anyway, our first aid kit only had an ankle wrap so I put some duck tape around my finger ^^' jon helped me with the tape... ... to skip though it all.. we both pretty much addmited that it has all just been a game to each of us... that Jon.. wanted.. well thought of us having sex... .. .. though this whole talk.. I was just... triping over every other fucking word... ... He apologized for not letting me talk before... ... He... was saying.. why deny my body and shit.. and that he was... kinda scared when he was taking me back to Beesons because.. he could of been in a LOT of trouble.. since of the age difference ^^',\ .... yea.. but... i was at the sink.. and.. I asked him.. why he had held my hand... and. he said.. because it felt good.. and.. still ... it's like 'why not?' to him.. even though there is that age difference .. he says that he doesn't look at age.. and.. sex.. and that contact and all he wanted... I knew it from the start.. i just.. wanted.... to see.. if I could have a different physical relationship with him.. just friends but.. him not always trying to make a move on me... ::sigh:: yea.. but anyway.. he came up to me.. and ... his hand .. well really his finger tips started at my shoulders and went up and down my back.. and then... he's like 'tell me this doesn't feel good, tell me you don't want this'.. and.. it keep going lower.. and he ::clears throat:: went over my ass some too >.> and his eyes.. they.. were so different... and h was close... real close.... and.. I said ... 'stop it'.. softly.. and he kept going.. I didnt resist.. and... he said 'do you really want me to stop?' and I said.. yes that i was sure and told him to stop again.. and.. he did... .. I was dissapointed I had to tell him twice. We talked the whole time we was there... we worked with Megan .. that new girl. again... later on he said.. that... .. he makes the moves.. or whatever and he got the vibe that I .. wanted the same as him.. just.. a benifical thing.. no strings attached.. that.. that was the best kind of thing.. why not like it?... and he.. said that .. he makes the moves on me and I give him these looks but dont' make any moves back!.. God I cracked up at his face... h aha.. so cute. He asked me.. if .. I wanted to stop talking to him.. and I said no nothing like that.. just.. well ... and then he said.. so you want me to stop.. (his eyes were always running over my body... grr.. ) and he was talking about my butt and I'm like 'well you could find a different way to say hi then a pat on the ass' and he's like 'like what am i suposed to say?' and i simply replyed 'hi' .. yea... he said... ... what if i give you a kiss? and.. i'm like "jon! we are supposed to keep things cool! not move them up!' and he's like 'hey' and shruged all smirking... yea.. we said.... well I said.. that we could keep it as it was... but.. .yea.. and anyway. .. i'm like.. 'be blunt and tell me what you think about this.. us' and he said.. 'well i guess since after all this happened i ain't getting no sex outta ya' ^^' god... yea.. but.. we talked.. and talked.. yea... then some dude came and helped jon out.. jon helped me alot.. he always does..god i have it so easy there ^^' I told jon to bring some drinks next time we work together.. that should be friday.. no more working saturdays... i hope... Dad got there before i even called... .. yea.. heh.. ... ... Still doing research about this arizona thing.. dad said if we could find a house that he doesn't have a problem moving... my bother.. is about to get himself kicked out.. he thinks he is always right... my mother is afraid of him i can tell.. i wish he would hit me.. so .. he could get kicked out.. bastard.. even if i am his sister he is 19 .. i could call the cops on him for harassment... ... ... i'm taking someones advice.. they told me to talk to my parents.. sit and listen to them without saying a word.. ask them the question of what they want me to do with my future... .. i will ask them.. once i get a good paycheck i'll take them out ot eat.... .. .. i'm paying jessica to do my school work ^^' my yearbook pages XD god i hate that class... yes but .. $5 a page.. damn.. i don't know when i can pay her.. I just bought a $36 piano book.. anyone go to hiei's site and listen to his legend of mana theme thing.. it's in that book i bought and i'll learn how ot play it ^^ I gave dad $16... that was all my paycheck... ah.. on the 17th is our school field trip.. .. i'll have no money for it.. ... wow.. i have to get off to rub my mother .... .. ... i layed outside with my bird in the night.. for like 40 minutes..... ... i love gunnies.. ... i like those birds... i love the night.. but.. i'm so scared of being out there in the dark without protection that i'm constantly looking around and never relax... .. i was thinking of jon.. and how. ... i wish he was there.. i wondered if he would just lay there with me... looking at hte sky and not tring to hump me -.-' ... jon... ... arizona... ... I'm still looking up schools and stuff.. i requested a booklet but the lady said to contact another area for it.. so.. i e-mailed them today.. and if they don't reply.. i have their number and i guess i'll have to call them long distance... ... .... Ja~ |
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Hiei | 05-13-04 2:42am There's something wrong with you. All you talk about is that dumb ass Jon over and over again. Well for us readers out here we're tired of it! Atleast I am. I mean you only have two people who read your journal and they're guys, like we want to know about some conspiracy waiting to happen. Talk about something else like the stuff you don't mention in every entry. |
mizu87 | Re:, 05-13-04 10:53pm Hiei, thank you. You really made a happy feeling come to me when I read your comment.
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| jahreee | 05-14-04 1:59am I must be pretty god damn special around here when you said "Thanks you guys" and I haven't said shit yet. Fine with me though. ^^
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Hiei | 05-14-04 6:14pm Him too eh? Then you don't need my comments. |
mizu87 | Re:, 05-14-04 7:13pm Hiei! Nonsense... need your comments? I look forward to them! Of course I need them!...
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