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	behindmysmile (profile) wrote, on 5-18-2004 at 7:58pm
Current mood: hopeful Subject: May 18th
I am receptive to the idea that...I always have a choice about how I respond to experiences in my life. If you have ever thought of yourself as a victim, you will have difficultly trusting yourself, god or anyone else. As long as you are a victim you will have someone to blame, someone to hold accountable for what went on and what is going on in your life. Sure, something unpleasant happened! That was then, this is now. There is no need for you to remain a victim. As long as you are a victim you can take no share of the responsiblity for who you are, what you do or how you feel. You see, victims do not respond in choice, they react in fear. As long as you are in fear, you cannot trust. As long as you are a victim, you cannot see the lesson. In fact, you may not want to see the lesson. You want an explaination! You want the whys answered, but no matter what anyone says, you will not believe it because you don't trust anyone. As a victim you cannot admit that you have grown and are growing in response to your experience. Rather than choosing to see and celebrate your growth, you choose hurt, anger, fear, indignation and self righteousness. In fact, the taste of anger is probably rising in your throat right now because you don't trust that anyone knows how horrible it was for you. Nor do you trust that anyone other than you understands how that horror is still very active in your life. They do. They also realize that the reason you cannot let go of being a victim is because to do so means deciding for yourself what else you can be. And victims do not trust that they can do that. Until today, you may have been singing a victim song so loud that you did not realize that there is a redemption song. Just for today, trust yourself enough to sing your own praises about how far you have come, how much you have done, how much more you are willing to do, in spite of all you have experienced. Today, I am devoted to trusting myself to break the chains and shackles that have made me a victim! I love mah babii Ali jean!! Your my best friend i luv you!!
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