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| robbingnovember (profile) wrote, on 1-16-2003 at 9:58pm | |
| Current mood: incredible... incredibly bad haha Music: 'the whole world's asleep counting ordinary sheep' Subject: rockin out on the key board. |
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| This is when my bipolarness shines. Half of this entry will be delightful and the other half will hopefully be completely depressing, well at least thats what i am going for. Let's talk about the good before i completly lose that feeling to the dark side. All in all, everyone looked amazing. I would marry at least 10 of the guys in there on the spot. Yes. I do. Protagonist should have won just because i need all of them to date me. But actually the right person won. Congrats. I know all your songs. The rappers were pretty good. but i think that others deserved to win too like enough to have or maybe one of the singers. But basically i have to say that i have a complete and utter infatuation with a guy a never met. Not the first and certainly not the last. Not that that's a good thing. Yes i am totally insane because i act like this guy is a fucking star. When he is really basically my age. except older and in a band. Basically i don't know if i will ever wash my arm again i think i will just leave the shower door open and stick it out. I am the biggest insane teenybopper fan. I wish i wasn't. Everyone from protagonist is marrying me. I don't care is they want too. I am soo hyper and infatuated. need a hose or something to cool me off. whoa. So many cute guys. Why the hell am i single. Well that sentence leads me to the second part of this entry proof that i am invisible seemed to be shoved in my face today. And seriously i hate you. Now i feel horrible just thinking about it. Dammit Dammit Dammit. Why the hell do i do this to myself. Why the hell do others do this to me? I can't seem to breath today. I hate fooling myself. Yeah of course , yeah of course You are so fucking great Sarah. Why the hell don't people like you? or even notice your around? It's really funny Time and time again i build myself up to believe i am something but this keeps on building too and i can never rise above it. And i wish i could go into specifics but that would just make me feel stupid and everyone thinks that i have low expectations for someone so picky. but i don't because they don't want me. I'm supposed to be happy that they even look in my direction. [And they do look in my direction sometimes but its not at me] and no one can make this better. because i don't need to hear false sympathy and i don't need to hear that i am great because i feel like shit right now. and i am crying. because that's how much it hurts.[to be me] and i am not making this up. i wish i was. |
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| Anonymous | cheer up emo kid, 01-17-03 10:33am i <3 sarah.
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Anonymous | 01-17-03 3:22pm dont you hate it when ppl taht you dont want...leave comments |
robbingnovember | Re:, 01-17-03 3:28pm not really. |
blueyed | Re: Re:, 01-18-03 3:24pm My love and a half. "Theres more to life than being in a band" haha..quite in the mood of random as of now. |