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| spinoangel (profile) wrote, on 1-19-2003 at 12:59am | |
| Current mood: unloved Music: the singing in my head Subject: a girl can dream... can't she? |
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| i am emotionally frustrated. how come i cant dream? its like my heart is telling me that it's drawing a blank right now. this is the first time that i've posted like three times in one day. maybe jus cuz there's so many oppurtunities of writing about myself. and my life. where the hell is he? ya know... HIM. the one that makes my heart skip a beat. the one that i go to school for. the one that i love. i'm beginning to believe he doesn't even exist anymore, ya know? everyone in their life has had some special type of relationship, but it's like i've never even been close to getting someone like that. i'm a freak. how come guys dont appreciate how i am? i think i repel guys somehow. like for some reason, i feel like i'm not friendly towards guys unless i crush on them. but i know thats not true, so i dunno. "true love is like ghosts, which everyone talks about but few have seen." "those who can, do. those who cant, teach." oh yeah, i'm a long time teacher here. i think im great at being romantic and sweet, but i have never had anyone to be sweet towards. if i dont get a guy soon, i might just run out of ideas. come valentines day... just look into my eyes and see the pain of lonliness. i love my friends and all, but nothing compares to someone holding you and making you feel all warm inside. or the feeling that there's someone who never gets sick of you and loves you for every part of you, good and bad. sometimes i feel like that person will never come along to me. cuz if they havent come by now, who knows how much longer i'll hafta wait. it's like there's no one in the world for me to love [in that way]. dont get me wrong, i'm not always this mope-y or depressing, but i feel so alone. how come no guy ever displays any affection towards me? and why does when the one time i find someone i could and i want to be with, he ends up taking me for granted as this "obsessed" freshman? he sucks. and so do the majority of guys. no offense, but yall can be a little blockeaded sometimes. there are guy friends which are very much potential lovers, but i dont see then at all, so its like the fire isnt fanned. i want you to want me... i need you to need me... i'd love you to love me... ... watchin lovers walkin', hand in hand they pass me by. wish I was one of them, wish I had somebody wakin' up beside me... looking into my eyes at night i want a love to call my own, i want someone that i can hold. want someone wanting me, wanna feel how it feels to be somebody's somebody. |
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Lizzy | hey hun, 01-19-03 8:30am awww...dont be so depressed. I know it seems like you'll never get a guy, but you will. I never had any luck until this year, and look where i am now! What I say is, make a lot of guy friends, then get to know them, and then if u like them maybe you guys can date. This way you don't have to save yourself for one guy, but be open to many options. Love comes in the most unexpected places ya know...Anyway, good luck, and you sound very poetic while depressed...lol |