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brownsugar (profile) wrote,
on 6-24-2004 at 11:52pm
Music: nothing compares to you- Sinead O' Connor
Subject: It's all coming to an end.
it hit me.
I'm losing everyone. Today was one of the last times, maybe the last time I'll get to see everyone together again. The people i found myself getting so close too. Are now leaving. They're going to be gone, just all gone.

I feel as if I'm losing the world because in this world it is so hard to find real people.. and now that I have foudn real people. I felt so complete. And now everyone's leaving me. The people I found myself getting so close too are now leaving and I feel so empty.

It's like we're all not going to get to spend time together, ALL of us together..ever. And I spent some of the greatest times with these people. and now they're all leaving me. And it's just all coming to an end.

I feel as if now it'll be so lonely. especially this upcoming month. Because everyone is just leaving for their own ways. On their own little summer expeditions.. everyone is just going on with their summer plans.

I wish I could just go through this last month again and all the laughs all the crazy stuff. And I wish I could just make everything back to normal again... and be able to see the same smiling faces everyday. But life moves on... and so does everyone else. While I'm left...I'm left in good old edgemont to see what else is in store for me. It just takes over me liek this surreal thing, this grief and such... and such... denial that such hapiness could ever come to and end.

an end you just can't control.
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HollishDanishM

06-25-04 1:44am

Hi Wheeny!
Let me just tell you I love you. For me, it's hard to relate to this because I have always been the one traveling, leaving people it's never been the other way around. Of course I've missed people, but that's different. I don't know what to say, except well that sucks, and that you'll see them again- and be happy that you have at least found some great friends, and shared times with them.
I am going to Denmark, and I'm really looking forward to it. Don't know why I just said that, but it's finally hitting me that I'll be around new people for three weeks. Have a wonderful summer, and I will call you when I get back. Thanks for putting up with me, and listening to me!
Love you,

Mette

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Anonymous

06-25-04 2:51am

Hey Tina,

I read that entry. And I don't know why, but I cried. I understood your viewpoint, and actually felt your pain, your sorrow. It's weird...but I can totally relate to you, even though I'm going to be on of the ones abandoning you as well. Having people move on, grow up, leave their old lives and start with the new - and watching it all happen. Watching everything slowly come to an end. Watching it with no cure, no way to slow down the process. It's all life, people change and grow. And just remember that. I love you and I will always be by your side. Although that sounds so cliche, it's true. Whenever you need a shoulder to cry on, I'm here (as you know..I'M ALWAYS HERE TO ANNOY THE SHIT OUT OF YOU!!) But back to the seriousness- it's hard to say goodbye. It's one of the hardest things that we can possibly do in our lives. The people you consider your second brothers and sisters, people to whom you've grown so eternally close to- they will be leaving. But just remember, they will always be there for you, no matter how far apart, no matter how far away- they will always be there. And you can count on this- take my word for it. Trust me, it will be hard in the beginning, but you will learn how to cope through this. (cope, cope, pace, pace lol..track ..after all, nothing can be as hard to accomplish as running a mile!) Tina, I know you can find the strength inside yourself to live through this as hard it may seem. I feel bad for you, I really do. I am tear-eyed right now. But just remember that I am always here for you, and so is everyone else- we are always here. You are such a wonderful person, with such a genuine heart, and I love you so much. Thanks for being there for me.
You are one of the few.

Unconditional love,
Dorina

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