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| dmlxoxo (profile) wrote, on 7-26-2004 at 7:33pm | |
| Current mood: aggravated Music: father of mine- everclear Subject: okay, so steve still works at swimming.... |
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| ....but hes now forbidden to come to fire island for any other reason but work. two nights ago he stupidly got smashed like ive never seen anyone get smashed before, forgetting the fact that he was taking the ferry back to bayshore where he was to be picked up by his mother. i swear to god he was the most messed up ive ever seen anyone before, he could barely walk, he couldnt keep his eyes open, and when he had to pee, he would just whip it out right then and there and go on the community house. a brilliant moment for those of us who were there. i walked him to the ferry at 10:50, along the way stumbling on top of multiple parked bikes while trying to walk the straight line of the sidewalk. he got on the ferry, went to the other side, and sure enough his mom figured out that he was drunk. he now owes me $5 because he bet me that he wouldnt get caught...he refuses to pay because he "doesnt remember" the bet (if i were that messed up that night god knows i wouldnt either). his punishment: no more fire island for the rest of the summer except for work and then thats it (keep in mind, steves a commuter, he comes on the ferry every morning from babylon). so heres where i come in. after lauren finally broke it to him that shed rather be with cash and i finally figured out that i actually do like him, its pointless because he cant come out anymore. to tell him or not to tell him, thats what im contemplating. this wouldnt even be a question had i not promised him i would tell him when i sorted my feelings out as well as the fact that a small part of me wants him to know. if i tell him and he likes me, hell feel crappy that he cant do anything about it because hes not here. but if i dont tell him and his mom lets up and lets him come out sometimes and he doesnt know how i feel, then its hopeless. help me, i need to know what to do. in other news, taylor and alec are supposed to come out and visit me soon. that should be interesting, i believe thursday is the date. i heard from steph the other day---god i miss that girl. as her camp friends tell her everyday, shes so lucky to have a single best friend like me who she can actually rely on for everything. im so greatful for having her, i miss her and want her to come home so i can see her again. i really wish she could meet mike and steve, and my other friends out here. hm. also, ive found a really awesome friend in someone i recently became close with this year, his name is nick and hes come to be like a brother to me. i love that kid to pieces, i really, really do. he helps me with my problems, i help him with his, we can be ourselves around eachother, and i love "rockin out" with him on the beach. its friendships with people like him that make me miss fire island so much when im at home, and make me frustrated with edgemont all the time. the majority of my friends out here are boys- that could NEVER happen at home. i love it, its good to have variety. f.i. girls and guys i love u all to death, ur the reason i live 10 months for only 2. thats all for now, if u have some advice on the steve thing, please dont hesitate to comment, i need all the advice i can get. |
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| Anonymous | tell him, 07-26-04 8:07pm Please, tell him. We all look back at our missed oppertunities, regretting we didn't take action. God knows I've done that one too many times. You'll regret it forever if you don't. And who knows, there might just come some sort of "romantic" relationship out of this. Good luck with it. |
Lizzy | 07-27-04 12:38pm i think you should tell him. you have such a limited time together, so there's a lot less risk. idon'tknow. i just think you should tell him, esp since you kind of want to. <3
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