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0x-FwAh-Em-ChAn-x0 (profile) wrote,
on 8-5-2004 at 11:59pm
Current mood: Depressed, annoyed, nervous, paranoid.. hopeful.
Music: TV
Subject: These things fuel my depression..
What would we be doing if we were alone in my room right now?

Post this in your journal to see what people want to do with you

Be truthful if you love me.

I haven't posted in a while, as you can draw from the last post's date.. I got home a few days ago from my crazy July trip, and I had fun.

We went through Canada, first, stopped in New York, drove to New Hampshire, saw some stuff, went back to New York, saw Niagara, went back through Canada to Michigan, met up with Grandpa, and here I am.

Yeah.. There's not much I can explain.. It screwed, 'cause most of the time we were outside. But I love spending time with my cousins and aunt and uncle. They were so accomodating to me, and there's really no way I could thank them.

Unfortunately, being outside so much made me much, much more paranoid. So much so, I couldn't even go out with out rushing, walking quickly, covering my ears.. And I'm paranoid here, the things have gotten to my head. Any minute buzzing noise it magnified greatly into my ears.

I hate it..

I can't help but almost feel I should make some short of bubble.. for when I go outside.. Some sort of security blanket..

This just shows you, my loved people, how weak minded and afraid I really am.

Thinking of my paranoia of bees fuels my depression.

I saw a commercial about vaccinations, and this got me thinking about doctors and needles and the smell of the cleaning sollution they dab on your arm..

Which made me extremely nervous, because I need some shots still..

Thinking of needles fuels my depression.

Do you see how weak minded I am? I can't even stand marching band. I had one day, just ONE day of marching band practice and automatically hated it. I can't put up with it.. It's just..

Augh.

I can't explain it.

My weakness fuels my depression.

Do you see? Do you see how stupid I am? I'm not trying to throw a fucking pity party for myself, but apparentally it's something I can't help.

On a lighter note, I can't wait to see all my friend. I love them so much.

They keep me going through all my fears, doubts, worries, and weaknesses..

And I could never, ever thank each and every one of them enough.

Thank you, each and every one of you, even if I haven't met you before, for pulling me through..

I love you all.

I promise.
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Anonymous

Question, 08-06-04 12:52am

What would we be doing if we were alone in my room right now?

Talking of course, what kind of guy do you think I am? =P


~keith

(reply to this)

a-demons-angel

08-06-04 4:13am

Watching adult swim, talking about the next convention, laughing at Inuyasha, cringing at the thought of that being our bums that were gettin' rubbed, cursing Miroku, drooling over Seshie-sama, talking about sushi and Dr. Pepper, finding some... somehow... Getting high off it, talking about Japan, and our sushi resturaunt/tattoo parlor/ coffee shop in Tokyo, looking at some yummies, and hugs!
I love you too Em.
Cheer up kiddo.
<3

(reply to this)
Anonymous

08-06-04 4:54am

Well youd prabably be trying to show me dead baby lizards from your project and id run away. T.T

No more saddness kay?

See ya soon

*Rik

(reply to this)

0x-FwAh-Em-ChAn-x0

<3, 08-06-04 10:17am

You're probably right, Keith. We all know you're all talk, no action. >.>;

Sounds like fun, Jadie! We gotta start working on our costumes super early, since we already know who we wanna be ^-^ Yeeey for whatever their names are! I know one's Boton.. what was the other one's? Oh well, love ya, chickie. Thanks ^-^

HA! Dead lizards will prevail, dear Rik! Why are you so scared of it? He's so cuuuuute T.T I love my little dead lizard to bit! But don't smell him, it's kinda like beef jerky gone wrong or something ^-^ Love ya!

Thank you! T.T

(reply to this)

Anonymous

Re: <3, 08-06-04 12:56pm

"You're probably right, Keith. We all know you're all talk, no action. >.>; "
So what're you trying to say lady??

=P just kiddin. I kno, /smack self, whyyy are you such a chicken????

Anyways....peace!


~keith

(reply to comment)

0x-FwAh-Em-ChAn-x0

Re: Re: <3, 08-06-04 1:27pm

You know I love you ^-^;;

Even if I can't get any.. ~snaps~

XD Just kidding, I think. Love ya!

(reply to comment)

Anonymous

Re: Re: Re: <3, 08-06-04 2:51pm

" I think"

Psh, I can do anything, just afraid to do something wrong and make the first move :P


~keith

(reply to comment)

0x-FwAh-Em-ChAn-x0

Re: Re: Re: Re: <3, 08-06-04 3:19pm

Well, nothing will happen unless you make the first move, silly boy.

Don't you play checkers? xD

Luvvles

(reply to comment)

Anonymous

Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: <3, 08-06-04 4:20pm

Awww Isn't cute how they flirt? Play safe you two..

~Rik

(reply to comment)

0x-FwAh-Em-ChAn-x0

Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: <3, 08-07-04 12:27am

You're one to talk, Mister "I miss Jade so much I can't keep my hands from my virginity" o.o;

Love ya ^-^

(reply to comment)

0x-FwAh-Em-ChAn-x0

Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: <3, 08-07-04 12:27am

You're one to talk, Mister "I miss Jade so much I can't keep my hands from my virginity" o.o;

Love ya ^-^

(reply to comment)
Anonymous

READ THIS!:Save the Whales!, 08-10-04 3:01am

Awwwwwwww so nice of you Ems....T.T;;;;;; You ain't the only one suffering of the horrid, bloody, yellow-black-flying-buzzing-things....named Bees....>.>;;; I wouldn't survive without my friends too....got me realizing about more important stuff...like living...sorry...v v;; that was a bad memory.....I'm sorry...~huggles~ I'll just die when I'm old and stuff...like everybody else...ahh nvm about that...too sad...T T; must of had fun up there though, I mean, how can the emz NOT have fun? Em puts the fun in funny! >.<; Seriously T.T

(reply to this)