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| squishylover (profile) wrote, on 8-20-2004 at 9:51pm | |
| Current mood: crushed Music: My own tears....how pathetic does that sound Subject: ick... |
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| ::Waves finger in the air:: wooo yay for unhappiness...I'm upset right now cause look another friday night and what? I get to spend it alone...yay for me. Let me explain, last friday I was supposed to hang out with Ryan but he calls at around 6 and asks if he can reschedual cause he was down in Boca with his friend Justin. I was like fine, I was upset of course but then I find out later that he was hanging out with his bestfriend cause he needed some guy time. Which is understandable so I wasn't upset with him, but still a bit bummed. (We hung out the next day and saw a movie which was nice...but yah anyways) This friday (today) Ryan and I were supposed to hang out but then he got schedualed to work so we decided upon going out after he got off at 8 to dinner or something. Eight rolls around I ate like some bacon to hold me over and all that good stuff I get a call from Ryan at like 8:15 he says that he got into an argument with his boss and people quit so he had to work till 9 and he already had a few slices of pizza...I was just like....AGGGHH! in my head of course. I asked if we were going to hang out and he said if I wanted to but I wanted to actually go out and eat with him not go out me eat and him sit there...cause I hate when that happens but I never quite got an answer but in the end of the phone call he says goodnight so we weren't going to hang out which leaves me in tears like the stupid person I am who gets too emotional. My mom didn't make it any better either I called her to tell her I wasn't going out and I told her what happened and she said that wasn't nice of him that he should have just had a snack like I had so that we could of gone out at 9 then she said something along the lines of him using me..but at that point I was about to cry so I stopped paying attention and had to cover up the tear soundyness in my voice...But in the end I tried to tell her that he wasn't that he wanted to still hang out with me but I said no...she actually didn't sound convinced but whatever. So thats the wonderful mood I'm in right now. I got upset and put my laptop on the floor and away message up and Ryan IM's me saying he apologizes and would I like some ice cream...but by the time I found it....he was already signed off. So I don't get to see Ryan at all this weekend so it seems...I never get to see much of him anymore not even at school. I get to see him maybe once or twice a day sometimes not even...and they are usually for either 10 or 2 min intervals. I think everyone else see's more of Ryan then I do...lucky me. Well Cheers to a fuckin' glorious night.... *Gah someone made a very good point which I should put in here....I know it's not Ryan's fault that we can't see each other much or hang out much...and right now I'm just upset cause another one of our plans got sent to crap....I just want to see more of him like I used to but thats life and this is what I get and I should just be happy that I get to see him at all.. **Just realized something else...I'm getting all emotional about this is because I miss Ryan...I just miss being able to be with him alot...and I just miss hanging out with him. -Chasmin- |
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| Anonymous | 09-01-04 11:41pm I know how it is to not see someone for awhile. I know its hard it is, but work through it...This entry almost makes me wanna cry
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Squishylover | Re:, 09-03-04 11:03pm Awww schmoopy...Thanks Brandon your a good guy.
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