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| THEhairybeast (profile) wrote, on 8-21-2004 at 2:54pm | |
| Current mood: cynical Music: dierks bently - Subject: ill try to make this the last words on this subject |
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| i know that what i did was wrong. and i know that is well reason to be pissed at a person. i know ill never hear the end of it and everyday theres gonna be a new person that "lets me know" im fucked up. but every fuckin person that is saying shit against me is seriously acting like i dont get what i did. youre putting words in my mouth saying that im okay with it and shit like that. if i was soo "okay" with it then why would i even bother apologizing or getting any words in? first of all, i damn well said i was sorry and i fuckin meant it. if nobody believes me then fine, im not gonna sit here and say sorry for the rest of my life. its a waste. especially since shes not gonna ever accept it or even believe it. shes not planning on fixing this relationship anyway. so we are done. i tried to be as nice as possible and everything, i mean why shouldnt i? i fucked up not her. but still. thats not the reason why im giving up. if she doesnt wanna take time to at least try to listen to me then i seriously have no reason to bother. and on top of all of that it doesnt help that people are influencing her to not listen. and as i said and probably other people, if shes willing to fix things with eric and everything then she can fix things with me. youre right sam, its your life, your opinion. well then fine, that gives me no reason to bother. and dont say shit about me not caring once i actually do stop "bothering". ive begged and apologized for the last fuckin 72 hours, probably more. and you havent taken one minute to listen. im not gonna sit here and worry about this damn thing if you dont even care. then again, why should you, i fucked up right? im not sayin you have to forgive me, like i said thats your decision. but you seem to have no problem listening to people sit there and "hate on me" and shit, so you can do that but you cant hear me out? your pissed off, yea, and your talkin shit, which helps, yea. but your listening to them and everything, so theres no hope that youll give me a chance. so i seroiusly quit tryin. i tried to be fuckin serious and shit and you laughed in my face and told me to 'shut the hell up'. ohwell i deserve that, bc im a piece of shit. yeahhh. i aint the only one who was fuckin tryin to get with someone.... but that dont matter. you said, "dont worry about what i do with eric justworry about whats gonna happen with me and you".. ok and im deff doin that and your not. so i dont wanna hear anyone rag on me bc i quit, you gave me no reason not to. and i read your little convo with jess, so if you guys seroiusly plan on "jumpin me" i aint gonna deal with that shit. i fucked up freshmen year i cant afford to fuck up sophmore year, if you dont mind. you wanna fight me dont fuckin bring that shit into school, im just tryin to pass with no bullshit. you fuckin know that so dont bring that shit into school. yeah, i wrote him notes, and he wrote me notes too [ dont forget that part.... ].. and i admitted and said i was wrong and everything. i know i fucked up and i cant say that any fuckin more. i already know, clearly i understand. what your not getting is that im sorry and im aware of what i did. you understood that with him why cant you understand that with me? and you also said in that convo that i just need to stfu and get over it.. hey, im not the one sittin here talkin to everyone about it.. im over it, i apologized and all that shit, my part is done. i cant do nuthyn else. you want me to stfu then fine. im "stfu".. later [ theres way more on my mind but w.e.. maybe ill comment. but as for the other comments in her journal, im done. ] |
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| Anonymous | 08-21-04 4:57pm vee, like i have sed to you before this all happens to the best of us. if sam wants to dump you as a friend she should leave her b*f too because he did as much as you. sam just really needs to sit down and think about actually what happend and not just jump to conclusions. just kno that i'm on your side becuse eric fucked up too and if you need to talk to me i'm here to listen! |
Anonymous | 08-21-04 5:12pm vee i 100% agree with you.. you cant say it anymore.. you KNOW what you did and your admitting it.. i could see if you were denying it and everytihng, but you clear out said you did it and you fucked up... and like i said, shes not even giving you a chance to explain ya know?.. so dont worry about it.. its her loss.. and im sure she'll have fun trying to find a friend whos even as CLOSE as a 'best friend' then you were.. so yeah, dont worry about it.. maybe she'll eventually come around and realise how good of a friend you were and that you cant be replaced.. maybe she wont.. but thats life ya know.. =/ it sucks.. but.. thats life...
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THEhairybeast | Re:, 08-21-04 5:55pm thank you melissa im guessing by the words used andd ree! i love you guys and im glad that you saw both siides and took time to listen to mine at least. thank you.
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Anonymous | Re: Re:, 08-21-04 10:10pm vee like i said im 0n b0th ya sidez.. but i d0 kn0 h0w ya feel... nd itz tru .. if she could jus drop you she should drop him too cuz it was jus as much him .. you admitted it nd thts bein a big person most ppl would flat out try to deny it! if ya ever need t0 talk im here
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THEhairybeast | Re: Re: Re:, 08-21-04 10:23pm i know =\
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| Anonymous | 08-22-04 1:01pm i gotta agree wit use.. vee u did everythin u could do and if that aint good enuff than theres nuthin else u can do. i think its so fucked up tho how sams choosin eric over yoou.. what happened 2 friends 1st? he was doin shit too so y should he get 2 keep the relationship? friends should come 1st, and wen they say their sry, accept it. sams missin out on a good friend. like u said, if u werent sry y would u be writing all this? and i think its bullshit if they wanna bring this 2 school.. grow the fuck up guys. hope everything works out which ever way it turns out.
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THEhairybeast | Re:, 08-22-04 2:23pm thanks britt..
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