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| mudpiegrl (profile) wrote, on 9-24-2004 at 6:33pm | |
| Current mood: frustrated |
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| i just told my mum how frustrating it is when she walks out when someone says something or plugs her ears or starts yelling back. she yelled but even you guys who dont live here know she doesnt really listen but she wants us to listen. she started telling me to go do my homework. i cant believe she had the nerve to tell me to do that when everyday ive come home and said i cant talk i have to go do my homework. how can she say that when i come home and tell her how much i love school. how can either of my parents tell me to clean my room or say its too messy when im doing more things than both of them put together. i try to be so patient with them but i get yelled at for not being home for dinner. on the other hand, i think im losing weight, but im sort of worried about it. i havent been sleeping adequetly enough nor have i been eating much...im always hungry and when i do eat, its not healthy. neil said i looked thinner and my pants are much loser than normal. i really want to go run because ive been meaning to...but im too tired now although i still might...and in the morning i dont get up early enough. normally i dont have a moment at home. im awake here only about two and a half hours any way...and most of it is getting ready for school or work. im really happy with how well my life has been going lately, contrary to how i was feeling the last month and a half or so. i hated myself and idndt want to do anything. now im fine but no matter how much i want to clean my room (its difficult to walk through), i dont have time or energy. i dont understand why my parents care so much, in fact, i figure they dont care. i think they have nothing else to complain about and so figure that its the only imperfection. im not sitting at home like mum, im not asking for significant amount of money to spend on nothing like tyler, im successful in what i want unlike my dad...and so i figure they dont know what else to say. im not around enough for them to pick apart my character and dont give them the opportunity to critique my life. all they know is that i am doing better than any of the rest of all my family did in high school, regardless of my lack of grades. im feeling better now...this is a good destresser. |
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sandatthebeach | 09-24-04 7:25pm ::hugs:: give me a call anytime you feel like running i'll go with you |