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| tuwang (profile) wrote, on 4-29-2002 at 10:02pm | |
| Current mood: pissed off Music: 311 - stealing happy hours Subject: AHHH |
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| God, I have a question. If you were hosting a party do you invite your boyfriend/girlfriend or not. that's right, she did it, but it wasn't that, I can understand if it's like some party for someone else, or a party strictly for her grade, but no, it's open. but this all could have not happened if she just wouldn't have said something. I mean, c'mon, you don't want to fight but you envoke it. Now don't get me wrong, I don't really care about the party, it's the principal of the thing. Yes THE PRINCIPAL OF THE THING. She says that it sucks that she never get's to see me, then , handed the oppurtunity, TURNS IT DOWN!!!! Are you embarassed by me, or something!? And I'm not backing down, everytime I get mad I always end up apologizing, and having her tell me not to give her shit. WELL TAKE THE SHIT. cuz I have alot more of it. I've defended you beyond reasoning. And this is what I get. If she wants things to be fixed, she'll fix them. |
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unwanted | *sigh*, 04-30-02 9:39am Okay, here's what I'm thinkin. Yeah, normally you would invite your S.O. to a party you host. And yes, this one IS strictly for my grade. Jes was making an exception for me and if you sat down and thought about it you would know I hate it when people make exceptions for me and I'm not about the change that now. So I'm sorry. Sorry I said something. Sorry I'm stupid and that I'm not perfect. I AM sorry.Whether you choose to believe that or not, that's not my choice. Just know I am. Which that probably doesn't help either since telling you I loved you didn't seem to help much last night. I just live it when you tell someone that you love them and their response is something like, "Yeah, okay whatever." That hurts, but I'm making the assumption that you don't care. Do you think I purposely try to cause fights? Cause I don't! If it were up to me, and perfection exsisted, things between us would be perfect because you mean way too much to me. Regardless of what you may think. It seems like you're holding my imperfections against me. Maybe you are, maybe you aren't, but it seems like you are. I don't know I'm just saying that I think you are. Okay, keep in mind that this party is a month or so from now. I'm damn sure that I'll see you a lot before then. I'm not embarassed by you either, bu as I've said before... you'll prolly just believe what you want to. Don't apologize, because I don't want an apology when I know that it wouldn't be sincere right now. And I'm not going to apologize until I mean it to because right now I don't think I'd mean it. Don't back down if you're pissed off at me, then pretend that everything is okay when you know damn well that things aren't and they should be. They could be too, we just need to sit down and have a BIG talk. Nothing held back, just flat out truth. What you need and want and what I need and what because we need to know. I don't want this relationship to get wasted away when you and I both know how great it can be. And yes, I'm taking your shit too, because I understand that you're mad and I deserve your shit right now. I admit, I've given you a lot of crap and I'm not going to make excuses for that, but I can't help that I make a lot of mistakes. I can't do everything on my own, Kevin. I can't fix this by myself and even you know that. You said that if I wanted to fix things then I would. I need you to want to fix things too, so don't say it's all up to me because it's not. We need to work it out together. You can't work things out by yourself. A relationship isn't one-sided... at least it shouldn't be. I'll take blame for this one, because it's mostly my fault. But it takes two people to have a fight, so I can't take 100% of tha blame and I'm not going to.
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