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spud (profile) wrote,
on 10-5-2005 at 5:02pm
Music: uno melodic (funk compilation old skool)
Subject: dear diary, (mood: apathetic...)

i must be eeemo...

well. i about crapped my pants. i put the stopper back in the throttle linkages, so the butterfly would open sooner. i could NOT possiby start from a dead stop without squawking them in first. until the stop screw fell out.

i have to devise a way to change the setting. i like how it is now for road driving. it's doggier than sin, but it's smooth, with good low-end torque. then when i'm "racing" i can shove some sort of stopper in, then just take it out when i'm done. but first i'll need to be fixing my hood latch. it sucks having to open it with a screwdriver.

"the mating call of the teenage girl"... i need to buy me some techno to blare on my system. and some mid-ranges for the back. i'm thinking some 6-8" woofers or something. i think that would cover what i'm missing. maybe closer to 5" i don't know. we'll see. i'll just try a bunch of different stuff. whatever dad has lying around the trailer.

i don't really want to drive the gti this winter. but i don't want to get a beater either. and i don't have anywhere to store it. fuck. i don't want to HAVE to get a job on top of school.

plus next semester, i'm bumping up to 16 credits and possibly an internship for even more credits. yes. i'm pretty insane, that's for certain.

i think jackie and i are over. but i'm not really sure. she's not saying anything. i guess i'll operate on the assumption that she hates my guts. and then if she doesn't, i'll provide her with ample reason to. which would prove difficult, because i hate being mean. but then again, maybe if i just keep being myself that will be reason enough.

i'm sore from lifting yesterday. and i did a mile on the treadmill. a WHOLE mile! aren't you proud of me? i knew you would be. i need to stay on top of the lifting business. i want to feel huge. not necessarily look huge, but feel huge. and right now i don't.

that's enough for now, i think.

funkalicious.
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rayray

10-06-05 11:47am

And I thought my life was stressful. I have no idea how you do it.

(reply to this)

spud

Re:, 10-06-05 8:56pm

i don't. it's not me that does it. as soon as i try and make things happen, things go wrong and i get overwhelmed. if i just remember that the only thing in my control is what i do and say. everything else... i'm just along for the ride. as long as i remember that the majority of everything is out of my control, i'm good. but as soon as i start trying to control it, i go berserk.

honestly, this is the most freedom i've felt in a long time. it's stressful, but i'm still enjoying it. and it's not impossible. it feels good to know that i can make it.

thanks for the note, rachel. we should hang out sometime. my hair's getting long again... you'd like it. hopefully things get better for you.

(reply to comment)

rayray

Re: Re:, 10-07-05 8:02am

We should hang out. Whenever you are free that is, I know you are quite busy.

Your long hair is sexy.

(reply to comment)

spud

Re: Re: Re:, 10-07-05 10:31am

cell: (616) 893 - 7952.

yeah. i'm always busy. well, actually, i've started making myself not be busy. it's a strange sensation. but yeah. whenever. i'll be around.

(reply to comment)

rayray

Re: Re: Re: Re:, 10-07-05 4:24pm

Cell : (616) 894.1143

Well the next time you have a few hours of spare time, let me know.

(reply to comment)

spud

Re: Re: Re: Re: Re:, 10-09-05 7:07pm

i'm going to be in your neighborhood tomorrow afternoon.

like, 3 ish. i cant afford a few hours, but if you wanted to grab lunch or something...

(reply to comment)