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skife (profile) wrote, on 8-4-2008 at 12:48am | |
some anon posted this, i'm still laughing. 9th grade: My first sexual experience that actually involved nudity. While we're fondling each other, she asks me if I like Diet Coke. Me: It's allright. Girl: Well, I LOVE it. How 'bout you go get me a bottle of it? I go downstairs and grab a 20 ounce bottle from the fridge. When I return, she says it's too cold. Girl: How 'bout warming it up...by rubbing it on my tits? So I began to rub her vigorously with the bottle. Soon enough, she asks me to shove it inside of her. She really enjoys it, and so do I because I KNOW that, with this girl, I'm definantly going to get off. That's when it gets crazy. She rips out the bottle, opens it, and begins filling her VAGINA with Diet Coke. I swear, she nearly empties the volume into her VAGINA. I had seriously underestimated this VAGINA's liquid retention volume. Girl: YOU LIKE DIET COKE?!?!?!? OH YEAH OH YEAH DRINK IT FROM ME! I was noticebly freaked me, but I did want to get off, and I didn't want my first load-blow to be into 18.7 fluid ounces of a 0-calorie beverage. I began to go down on her, until she said the exact wrong thing. Girl: OH YEAH, DRINK IT FROM ME! I'M THE KOOL-AID MAN! OH YEAH! OH YEAH! I don't know how she did it with 16-year-old voice, but she sounded exactly like the Kool-Aid man from the commercials. I glanced at the wall, half-expecting him to burst through and over me a fruity beverage. I was extremely turned-off. She could tell, too. As she sat up to see what was wrong, she twisted her body in such a way that Diet Coke shot out of her VAGINA and all over my face, chest, and groin. And it was at that sticky, low-calorie moment that my parents chose to pull into the driveway. |
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Post A Comment |
phil-himself | 08-04-08 11:03am /facepalm |
jayzulla | 08-04-08 11:44am I would have known something was horribly wrong when she started filling herself.... lol, that gave me a good laugh. |
brianna | 08-04-08 5:57pm *laughs hard* wow. just wow |
outsyder18 | 08-04-08 9:01pm |
outsyder18 | 08-04-08 9:12pm |
brianna | Re:, 08-06-08 12:03pm one of my favorite macros |
phil-himself | 08-04-08 9:38pm old copypasta is copypasta and old |
outsyder18 | Re: Copy And Paste This Bith, You Fail, 08-04-08 10:04pm |
phil-himself | Re: Re: Copy And Paste This Bith, You Fail, 08-04-08 10:07pm nate go swallow some razor blades cause you don't have any idea what im talking about
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phil-himself | Re: Re: Copy And Paste This Bith, You Fail, 08-04-08 10:12pm im working 3rd tonight so im going to be suprised if I dont strangle something in the next 9 hours |
jim9nin | Re:, 08-04-08 10:18pm this phrase is 100% correct. |
jim9nin | Re: Re: Re: Copy And Paste This Bith, You Fail, 08-04-08 10:19pm Now ITT: Black Album is both black and album...discuss. |
phil-himself | Re: Re: Re: Re: Copy And Paste This Bith, You Fail, 08-05-08 7:47am and megadeath |
outsyder18 | Re: Re: Re: Copy And Paste This Bith, You Fail, 08-05-08 10:28pm |
Anonymous | Re: Re: Re: Re: Copy And Paste This Bith, You Fail, 08-10-08 11:22am black album is black, therefore we hang black album? |
skippi16 | heh, 08-04-08 10:49pm well i will never think of diet coke in the same way again thank you for that.... whats going on for tjs party??? let me know |
eddy | 08-10-08 6:50am I'm so glad I do not drink diet coke. This was effectively disturbing, thanks, lol. |