| Add Memory | Add To Friends | |
| oceanchild (profile) wrote, on 12-21-2008 at 10:23am | |
| My grandfather may be dying. He went to the emergency room twice the other night due to pressure building up in his heart. They gave him some medication to help control it and reminded him that he's only mortal. Not the kind of thing that it's particularly encouraging to hear from medical professionals. Yesterday I was at a high school reunion which was actually a lot of fun. I'm coming more and more to realize that I occupied an uncommon position, socially, back then. Most of the people I wandered over to talk to last night complained to me that the same cliques that excluded them in their high school years were still in effect. I never really felt reined in by clique boundaries because I never really felt myself in one. I just talked to whomever I wanted, and they were chill with me. Every time I see people from back then that I've lost touch with, it surprises me all over again how happy they seem to see me. I was less alone than I thought. Probably because of the reunion I had a disorientingly lifelike dream about Dria. We talked about what had happened between us and I finally got to pour my heart out to her about both how I feel I handled things badly and how it wasn't entirely my own fault. And she was really listening. I thought for a moment that maybe we could even rebuild the friendship, and for the first time ever in a dream about Dria, that prospect didn't frighten and distress me. In all of the other cases, we've never addressed the problem directly, and so what was in line to be rebuilt was not the friendship but the dependancy, I suppose. I woke suddenly as we were on a bus going somewhere and was both shocked and disappointed to realize that it had been only a dream. |
|
| Post A Comment |
|
rorin | 12-25-08 3:00am I noticed recently that my father was standing "still" on the phone and his head and arms and hands were slightly shaking... Like an old man's. He's 60. I'm so freaking scared. |