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| godessalthena (profile) wrote, on 3-29-2014 at 11:27am | |
| Sus is FINALLY completely out of my life. We separated the joint accounts, we separated the phone lines, we are done. Free at last, free at last. In the hours preceding our meeting, my trepidation was close to my limit for mental stress. As I was driving, I was thankful for the distraction my unfamiliarity with the area created for me. I parked, I saw his car, we awkwardly said hi and made small talk. I flirted unashamedly with even man we came across. I updated him with how wonderful my life is, how I am friends with all those who had once been our enemies and how far I've come in the year since we broke up. He talked about that same shit he talked about last time I saw him. His hair was long, faded with faded dye on the ends, everything else looked the same. Nicely dressed, tired, creepy. We left the bank and went to the AT&T store, separated lines and then seperated ways. I couldn't bring myself to say anything I wanted to. I couldn't bring myself to be mean. Honestly I think it would just be completely lost on him. All the psychological damage, all the horrible memories, all the fear, doubt, self-loathing and anguish he created in me... I just am going to let it go. I'm done with that part of my life. It happened, I survived it, I over came it and now I'm leaving it where it belongs -- in my past. It feels very liberating. I feel like a huge weight has been shrugged off my shoulders. I can finally leave this all behind. I love being alive. I love my life, this one I've made for myself. And it's only going to get better from here on out. |
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goodbye | 03-29-14 7:16pm I'm so happy for your happiness and so proud of the strong woman you've created within your soul. You deserve to have happiness and believe in yourself. You deserve a healthy relationship. You deserve everything you have because you've worked hard for it. I love you, friend. |
alexithymia | 03-30-14 6:53pm I'm glad we became friends. |