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| Atman (profile) wrote, on 4-18-2003 at 9:52pm | |
| Current mood: Lonely Music: Pfft, like I care Subject: Pfft, like I care |
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| Pfft, like I care...I mean, hi. That concert made me do some deep thinking. Well, I've decided tonight that I am alone and always will be...nothing can change it. I'm always the guy in the back, the third string, waiting in the wings, hanging back, in the dug out. All that stuff. I'm not good enough to be anything else, nor do I match the potential of being anything better. I'm basically the one people look upon and go, "oh look, theres addison..." and then don't do anything. Or, "Hi addison...well, I gotta go" I'm so lonely right now...I owe it pretty much to that Trifecta from hell. Ha, yeah that was awesome...nothing like that to make me feel even worse. I coulda hung out with moe tonight...these thoughts wouldn't have occured for more time, but FUCK NO, I had to do track, so that invitational screwed me over. I hate that damn sport so much...I swear, if not for nate, chris, and jacki, I wouldn't do it. Not for the life of me. My parents could do whatever the hell they wanted. I don't care. Yeah, and so now my mom wanted to know why I've been depressed tonight after getting home early...its a waste of time. I don't know why I tell her...its pointless. I even told her its pointless...I'd need to talk to someone else about this stuff before her. I even told her that. But me being lonely stays. I don't know why, I wish I didn't feel this way, but I do. I don't have anyone to fall back on, I don't have anyone I can talk to...I don't have anyone I could try this really cool sex manuever on. It involves me twisting around and...yeah. I'm not really in a mood to kid either. That concert made me realize a lot about myself. A lot of stuff...mainly that I was alone. In a big way. So...yeah. Wish me luck in that shitty invitational tomorrow. I'm gonna need it. I'm also to lazy to ILYTL, because I know there are no ladies willing to except that. Theres chris, but lets face it, he doesn't really count. |
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sugarjackj | oidsa, 04-19-03 12:10am you compllain all the time about not having anyone,but when will you ever learn that no one else really cares i have given up on it cause people idnt take the time to understand so i just stopped it is really too bad that people have to be like that
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jim9nin | 04-19-03 8:06am hey addison if you ever need to talk or somethin just come find me i'll listen. U should really ask jackie out. Remember it's better to have loved and lost than to never love at all. Good luck at your meet. |
Atman | Re:, 04-20-03 12:55am Bill, theres a few things you don't really know.
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cowsgomoo!!! | 04-19-03 9:47pm dont worry, tracks fucked my plans up to!! its just something we all have to live with i guess. well, im here for ya if you need it. |