spud
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::
2008 21 November :: 2.39am
And i still won it.
8 ::..So what?..:: |
::Yessa..::
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skippi16
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2008 20 November :: 10.30pm
well like hasnt given me much but lemons lately. my district manager wants to fire me for no reason other than i cost the company the most to pay out of all of the employees at the store, fuckin dumbass, and no one else is hiring so that totally suc
have a meeting with the financial aid people tomorrow and hopfully something good will come out of it i know i need to start school and im a total bone head for not going already but right now i am totally committed to being enrolled for at the latest summer semester.
dad lost his job AGAIN cause he cant stop fuckin drinkin, this is the 3rd job this year and mom wants me to fix it cause she's sick of it when half the reason he drinks is shes suck a bitch to him all the time. i wrote the VA in hopes that they can help in some way. just pray for me.
::Yessa..::
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tuwang
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2008 21 November :: 9.53am
if you could be less spiteful that would be fantastic...
11 ::..So what?..:: |
::Yessa..::
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spud
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2008 18 November :: 3.55am
so, i saw the first cut of the summer film today. well, it's already been through several revisions. but this was the first public screening.
i will say, some things turned out really well. some did not. i'm glad to see that it came together okay, at least. i would have been pissed if it sucked, and surprised if it was out of this world. i still think some of the big problems with the story are in the script itself, and are therefore beyond fixing at this point. i also think that cleaning up the audio will do wonders. and that is going to be a formidable task. i'm just wondering if my class next semester is going to have to do all that. it would be interesting. then i'd have my hands on it during two phases of the process, instead of just one. that would be weird.
other than that, just business as usual. falling steadily farther behind in all of the important classes, with the one class that i'm doing best in the only class i'm actually making headway on.
it'll all come together in the end. i just hope the collision isn't too catastrophic for me to keep it together.
and in the meantime, just keep plugging away at it, little by little. but i am also running out of time, which means a step up in pace is in order.
1 ::..So what? |
::Yessa..::
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m&ms487
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2008 17 November :: 12.01pm
I have a french exam in one hour that I am not prepared for.
I'm fairly sure I just failed a math exam two hours ago.
But I think I'm going to be okay, and that's all that really matters right now.
[edit] I think the French exam went all right and I've almost eaten an entire tray of sushi. Yippee.
1 ::..So what? |
::Yessa..::
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phil-himself
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2008 17 November :: 2.32am
I don't know what to believe anymore.
Tired from over thinking, numb from over feeling.
When you try to move on and things get thrown back at you.
This whole event seems like mutually assured destruction.
::Yessa..::
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phil-himself
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2008 16 November :: 1.11pm
Mudvayne - Pushing Through This
Salt the wound
Cut through a conscience I've failed to explore
The calm before the storm
Speak your peace and prepare for the fall
Words have been chosen
Tainting the gift
Lying truth's so increditable
So fuck you all
I'm turning my back on this killing so small
Step by step I'm pushing through this
(All of you get away from me)
Eye for an eye I'm pushing through this
My law
Step by step I'm pushing through this
(All of you get away from me)
Tooth for a tooth I'm pushing through this
Through you
3 ::..So what?..:: |
::Yessa..::
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phil-himself
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2008 16 November :: 12.39am
Drastic steps
::Yessa..::
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tuwang
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2008 13 November :: 1.48pm
So yeah... I've got some time so I guess I'm about ready to update you guys.
Been pretty stressful here, as far as classes go. But I've managed to maintain an A- so I'm alright in that department. Plus I got an 88 on the last test with a class average of 62. My theory is that someone just didn't show up, regardless...
I really need to take some pictures of where I am at. I noticed that all my pictures are of me drinking. Not to say that I'm not drinking a lot, a problem I need to find a solution for desperately, but I'm not JUST drinking. I'm doing a lot of things recently. I guess the problem is that I have a hard time taking pictures of anything interesting because I feel like such a tourist. I will do a lot of things here because I don't really care what the people think of me, and it gets me somewhere usually. For some reason, though, I can't seem to take pictures. Soon enough I will get some real good ones.
Speaking of drinking, this weekend is sure to be packed to the brim of fun. starting tomorrow morning I'm going to some elementary school to play games with kids. It's mandatory, which kind of pisses me off. I've already volunteered to do a few of these kinds of things and I'd rather just sleep in, but you know, I guess I gotta do what I gotta do.
So after waking up at around 8 and getting back at around 12, I have 2 hours or less to just chill out for awhile, before I have to bike to the train station to catch a train to Kyoto. Luckily they are paying for the ticket for me. By them, I mean some Women's College of some sort or another. They are loaded, and have decided to pay for a few of us to take a train and a taxi (keep in mind that a taxi is about 2 dollars per foot, fucking expensive) to the school, and then for the ride back. I'm not actually taking the train back though...
Afterwards, Nate, Nick, and I are going to chill in Kyoto and see what happens for awhile. They claimed that the event won't end until 8, and I'm still not sure exactly what we are doing there. I think we are just trying to help them with their english or something, who knows.
So I imagine we'll eat some food, get some liquor, do some shopping or something, and maybe buy a burger and McDonalds so we can take a nap. Yes you just read that correctly.
Around 10-10:30 we are meeting up with Kelly, Yui, Shige, Adam, Megumi, and maybe one of her friends, at which point we will consume endless amounts of alcohol and then attempt to do some clubbing of some sort. This will last, I'm assuming until about 5 in the morning.
Then, I will be fucked, I'll die on the train home, barely crawl into bed and go into a desperately needed coma until about 2 or 3 that afternoon.
I'll wake up, try to get some homework done, and then head out to the bar to bid my friends farewell as they head off to live in Tokyo.
Sunday, maybe I'll rest, we'll see....
I have a meeting with my teacher now for some conversation time so I will catch you chaps later.
だから、今私は先生と話に行きます。今週の週末にとても急がしくなります根から、らいしゅうぜんぜん話しないと思います。じゃあ、まったね。
::Yessa..::
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spud
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2008 11 November :: 1.14am
:: Music: Coldplay
ATTENTION!
Yo Internet Peeps:
My radio show is currently up and running. It has been for several weeks.
I'm sick of not having any listeners. The show sucks, because I don't try, because nobody listens, because I didn't advertise very well. Or at all.
So, I will be attempting to change this.
The show is currently: MONDAYS @ 4PM LISTEN HERE!
I'm thinking about doing a couple of themed shows. Maybe one entirely off of youtube, or one entirely of "red hot jazz" (think 1920s).
If you can't listen at that time, I totally understand. Which is why when I reschedule next semester, I will be asking for your input as far as what times on what days are good times to have my show, so I will hopefully have more listeners. Because I want to do something that everyone will enjoy, at a time that is convenient for them.
So, hopefully you can listen at that time for the next couple of months.
More updates will come later.
Peace,
Chris
::Yessa..::
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phil-himself
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2008 10 November :: 3.46pm
Lawls my insurance company gave me a PT Loser to drive while my chevy is getting fixed.
This has been a fun afternoon of abusing someone else's car.
::Yessa..::
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m&ms487
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2008 10 November :: 2.58pm
I haven't updated in a while. I haven't had time. No. That's incorrect. I haven't had the motivation.
Something is wrong. I'm sleeping all of the time and always tired. It's not depression. I went to the doctor's and they told me I had a viral infection and anemia. A week later, it should be better, but I slept for over twelve hours last night and I've been laying down every chance I get.
I went home on Sunday for a family reunion and the only things people said to me is that I look like a poster child for anorexia and I look tired. I've lost almost eighty pounds. I'm trying to stay stable at 130.
Although my test came back negative for mono, I still think I probably have it. Why else would I be so tired all of the time? Everything is suffering because of it: my grades, my attitude, my dealings with my friends and brothers.
I just want to wake up and be okay.
1 ::..So what? |
::Yessa..::
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phil-himself
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2008 9 November :: 12.27am
More bullshit, a fucking car wreck. Fucking Hell just what I needed tonight.
I would really like to be able to talk to a certain someone right now.
5 ::..So what?..:: |
::Yessa..::
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skippi16
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2008 6 November :: 3.52pm
applied for a few jobs onine today lets hope something bites.
oh and i got the new phone yay me
::Yessa..::
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andrea
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2008 4 November :: 10.26am
:: Music: Coldplay - Politik
Look at earth from outer space
Everyone must find the place
Give me time and give me space
Give me real, don't give me fake
Give me strength, reserve control
Give me heart and give me soul
Give me time give us a kiss
Tell me your own Politik
Open up your eyes
Open up your eyes
Open up your eyes
Open up your eyes
Give me one, cause one is best
And in confusion, confidence
Give me peace of mind and trust
And don't forget the rest of us
Give me strength, reserve control
Give me heart and give me soul
Wounds that heal and cracks that fix
tell me your own politik
Open up your eyes
Open up your eyes
Open up your eyes
Open up your eyes
Just open up your eyes
And give me love over, love over, love over this
And give me love over, love over, love over this
Happy Election Day!
1 ::..So what? |
::Yessa..::
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sugarjackj
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2008 3 November :: 5.18pm
Goodbye. Nice to know you.
2 ::..So what?..:: |
::Yessa..::
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sugarjackj
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2008 3 November :: 4.35pm
Im not sure what its all for.
Its getting harder to even find a purpose in life.
::Yessa..::
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skippi16
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2008 3 November :: 10.45am
so i lost my cell phone on saturday, found it smashed up in the parking lot Sunday morning, so now i have to use tjs old ass ugly phone until my new one gets here. instead of getting the same phone for like 50 bucks i upgraded for 80. its awesome cause i actaully talked the boy into it. heh i love him sometimes and now he wants to upgrade his phone too so next month i might just do that for him.
work still sux, just holding on until i can get a new one....
oh and THE MOTHA FUCKIN COLTS BEAT THE PATRIOTS 18 TO 15 WOOT WOOT EAT THAT!!
::Yessa..::
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tuwang
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2008 2 November :: 11.31am
you never realize how bitter cold you are until you step into that hot shower.
::Yessa..::
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skippi16
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2008 1 November :: 7.13pm
Halloween kinda sucked cause i had to be to work at 7am this morning... ahh well i do need a new job though i only have 23 hours this week and i am a fucking manager,
th is still a pain the the ass but we love him anyway, buttheads eye is getting better ( he has an ulcer in it and it almost ruptured last week)
::Yessa..::
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.j.e.s.s.
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2008 1 November :: 10.21am
i am having a horrible horrible day...week...
i/we have never done this before. we've always been so on top of things and yeah we've been short before but never honestly with nothing. this is going to wreck things for us. this stuff is permanent.
god how do you tell a friend that you need something because it's fricken ruining shit.
this sucks and i keep getting sick every single day from the stress and i am not liking it.
3 ::..So what?..:: |
::Yessa..::
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spud
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2008 29 October :: 1.26am
:: Mood: contemplative
recollections
::
i feel like i've lost a lot of my pizzazz. (or maybe you spell it pissass. depending on how many laxatives i took that day.) you know? i feel like i used to have more vitality, more everything. not that i was a driven, self-motivated type of person. not that i was spastic or rambunctious. i just feel like i had an undercurrent of motion that just isn't there anymore.
nowadays i let the simplest things prevent me from getting anything done, and i really don't feel the need to try and innovate, or make new things happen. i'm content to attempt, and fail, to merely recreate those which have come before. nothing outstanding. nothing superb. i just settle for okay.
but that really doesn't seem right. i don't want just an okay life. i don't want just okay friends. okay coworkers. okay family. that's not how it works for me. i feel like everything about my life up to this point has been outrageous. and now it's just mellowing out. i guess it's my job to keep it outrageous. but i have a lot of fucking jobs right now, which i guess is what's bogging me down. so, adding the job of unbogging myself to the pile doesn't really work. it'll just exacerbate the problem.
so, i just need to get a few things out of the way, one at a time, so that i have a bit more freedom to have some of that guilt-free, sporadic, funtime. where my energy is put to its most effectively pragmatic use. because clearly i don't get shit done when it comes to actual work. but give me something fun to do, and i'll forget to eat, sleep, and go to the bathroom, i'm so diligent.
and faking myself out to think that the "work" stuff is actually "fun" stuff doesn't cut it. believe me, i've tried. although, i have discovered that some of the "fun" stuff is actually "work". but since it falls under "fun" in my classifications, i can still do that, at least.
i guess we'll make it happen eventually. and until then, i'll just have to tough it out. but i want to be fun and exciting again. none of this boring, grumpy, old man nonsense. that suits me at times. but i don't think this should be one of those times.
i'll get there, and i'll enjoy it. but i'm not there yet. and there's no sense in rushing it.
1 ::..So what? |
::Yessa..::
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runningfreak
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2008 28 October :: 5.03am
:: Mood: Not sure
:: Music: Country (B-93)
Huh...
I cannot fathom how I managed to stay up reading my World Religions book and doing ungodly amounts of laundry on an hour and a half nap at 11:30 pm and liking it. I figured "Whats the point of going to bed, I need to be up at 5:30am anyways and with my luck I would prolly sleep through my alarm and miss my test which would be a bad thing." So I made eggs and toast at 3:15 am, read the paper, bleached some whites, folded previous loads of laundry, listened to the radio and finished my chapters on Confucionism and Taoism. I still have homework due by the end of today but the load is less intense since I have accomplished half of it on my adventure of spountanious laundry doing and homework completion.
I am definately going to feel this later. It is my long day today meaning school goes from 7:45am to 9:30pm
YEAH!!!!!!!
1 ::..So what? |
::Yessa..::
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tuwang
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2008 27 October :: 2.33pm
So, as with most updates as of late, I will preface my story with "interesting weekend".
this one I might actually describe though...
So Friday night was the Halloween party, which I feel like I'm continuously misspelling for some reason or another. A lot of fun, I got all good and sauced up for that because I had announcing to do. It helped with making everyone laugh, but did not help with pronouncing japanese names with horrible handwriting. To be crude, it looks like chicken scratch to me as is, but when someone writes like a 2 year old it makes it even more difficult. Either way, there was no harm done, and the party went off. It ended in a good mood and I continued to move on with my day. So at about 9 PM, me and my group of friends, including Nate, who thinks I'm a racist, Kelly, the blonde cutie who also thinks I am a racist, Yui, Nick, Megan, Adam, and Cooper, headed out to Kyoto for a wonderful night of dancing and getting shit faced! yay!
There were a few things wrong with this for me....
1) I was dehydrated
2) I was way too tired to be pulling an all nighter
3) I didn't eat all day
So, after consuming 3 chu-his, a bottle of vodka, and a half a bottle of wine, my mind was in a state of intoxication that I have never seen before. Granted for the first few hours of dancing my mind worked fine, but after 3 LIT's in the club I started to have crazy ideas. This lead to me leaving my group and wandering around Kyoto at 4:30 in the AM. Not cool at all. Although moderately entertaining.
I'm sorry Chris. I wish you could have been there to see it.
I'm pretty sure I'm an alcoholic...
three cheers?
3 ::..So what?..:: |
::Yessa..::
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skippi16
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2008 26 October :: 11.12pm
so i still have that kitten, but i have a home for, she is coming to get it this week... and this cat i think is part fish!! the last few days i have been taking baths to relax, well anyway when i get out and start to drain the tub she just jumps right in and plays with all the bubbles its cute... then i have to dry her off.
Ponderosa Corp. just filed Bankruptcy and i dunno what that means for me but i am looking for a new job. posted my app online and browsing things here in town.
::Yessa..::
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phil-himself
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2008 26 October :: 1.22pm
Not going into work today till 6:00pm because I have the flu. Such a shitty week this has been.
::Yessa..::
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skippi16
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2008 24 October :: 1.01am
:: Mood: contemplative
IM SO SICK OF THIS ELECTION AND IT HASNT EVEN HAPPENED YET
there are just so many things in my head. I have decided to be rational about this election, and just vote for nadar. Cause either way its not good and no matter who i vote for someone will disagree.... no one hates nadar right?
I look at it this way...If John gets elected, Good bye ecconomy hello rich getting richer and me gettin poorer and my healthcare can just lfy right out of the window and lets not forget that the man is like 70 and is soon to die so we get what Sara Palin. i dont think so. ... if Barack gets elected hello no more guns and tons of illegals still living off of my money. And lets be honest with ourselves, if he does get elected this country will slowly and SURELY become divided. ( and yes its sad). You all know it because there are still all those bigots out there who because he's black will think on way or another about him and i understand its wrong but i also understand that thinking of that nature still exists and we have to step up to reality and see that its not the time for it. as a country we are not ready for it, we're not mature enough. and thats horribly sad to say and i am some what embarassed that it still goes on but there is only so much i can do about it.
like i said we are F*ed either way and i dont see much improvment in out future....Canada Anyone??? lol
asside from all of that i have an eval coming up and i am not looking forward to it at all. i know i am going to get an ass chewing and i am almost to that point where i dont care...tsh can we just go back to like 7th grade it was all much simpler then
6 ::..So what?..:: |
::Yessa..::
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jedibumblebee
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2008 20 October :: 7.43pm
I want to ask you
Do you ever sit and wonder
It's so strange
That we could be together for so long
And never know, never care
What goes on in the other one's head
Things I've felt but I never said
You said things that I never said
So I'll say something that I should have said long ago
You don't know me
You don't know me at all
You don't know me
You don't know me at all
(At all...)
You could have just propped me up on the table like a mannequin
Or a cardboard stand up and paint me (paint me anything)
Any face that you wanted me to be
See, we're damned by the existential moment
Where we saw the couple in the coma
And it was we who were the cliche
But we carried on anyway
So sure I can just close my eyes
Yeah, sure, trace and memorize
But can you go back once you know?
You don't know me
You don't know me at all
You don't know me
You don't know me at all
(At all...)
You don't know me
You don't know me at all
You don't know me
You don't know me
If I'm the person that you think I am (Ahh....)
Clueless chump you seem to think I am (Ahh...)
So easily led astray, an errant dog who occasionally escapes and needs a shorter leash then
Why the fuck would you want me back?
Maybe it's because...
You don't know me at all
(Ahhhh, ahh...)
You don't know me, you don't know me
(Ahhhh, ahh...)
So what I'm trying to say is
What I'm trying to tell you is not going to come out like I want to say it
Cause I know you'll only change it
Say it
You don't know me
You don't know me at all
You don't know me
You don't know me at all
(At all...)
You don't know me
You don't know me at all
You don't know me
You don't know me at all
(At all!)
What?
2 ::..So what?..:: |
::Yessa..::
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tuwang
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2008 19 October :: 7.43pm
so. Interesting weekend.
I went and saw some old temple. I say it like that because after your 5th or 6th temple you stop appreciating the grandeur of them. Not that I have no appreciation at all... but they start to blend together. This one happened to be on top of this hill/mountain and almost naturally blended into the scenery. I mean, you had to look past the hordes of people that were there but otherwise it was quite scenic. It also helped that I had a fantastic tour guide, although I dont' think she thought so so much. Whatev, it was a good time.
Afterwards we went to eat pizza... which you don't see very often. (I've been here for about a month and 3 weeksish now and I've done pretty good, so I deserve a good cheating).
I've been progressivly losing weight... not so healthy I don't think, but I eat alot. Maybe I should just eat more?
this up coming weekend will be very hectic. Shigadai party on friday, and then kyoto on saturday (like every fucking weekend). But it's sort of the halloween weekend for them, so it should be interesting to see how they percieve the condemned holiday.
speaking of which, I still can't decide on a costume... any ideas?
1 ::..So what? |
::Yessa..::
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m&ms487
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2008 21 October :: 10.50pm
Sometimes I feel like I'm the only one laughing, the only one aware. I just can't shake the feeling that sometimes I see things in a way that no one else can even comprehend.
Central won against Western. For those of you who don't know, it's a big deal. There are five state troopers parked about two hundred yards away from my apartment to keep things "under control." This is probably the quietest Saturday night of the year as of yet.
::Yessa..::
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