a bit emotional
i really feel like i havent done such a good job as to being a good friend lately. i feel as if i've drifted away from some of the people i felt i used to be around that made me feel like i couldnt go two days without seeing them. it's quite sad really. i really wish things were like they used to be. me and ari arent close like we used to be. i miss her, i miss her a whole lot. bri too. ha...that girl and i had some good laughs between us. i miss that. i feel like noone really wants anything to do with me anymore. like...i dont know...i felt like that before me and ash became so close that everyone just wanted to be friends with other people and i was like whatever. than me and ash became friends and now they are all mad at that. its just ash is one of the bestest friends i've ever had and i havent had a friendship like that in a while. like sister, ya know? but it makes some people upset to see us together i think. i dont know why....i hate high school drama. i really cant wait until i turn 18 and leave. it really makes me sad. cause i miss all the friends i used to have. like yesterday i was thinking i wanted to call someone but the only people i really ever talked on the phone to on a regular basis was ash, mike, and ari. now me and ari...i dont really know what happened. and then you know that whole mike thing is over, so now it sorta feels like i only have ash. which i am not saying is a bad thing. i love ash to fricken death but still...i would be nice to a few other good friends around when me and ash cant do stuff. and i know i have you guys (mindy, jessica, and eddy) but i mean like tc people...it just sucks. i wish things were....easier...*sighs* but...in the words of Mick Jagger..."You cant always get what you want.."

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