:: 2013 23 November :: 10.47 am

I just want to feel like you still love me.

:: 2013 15 November :: 12.07 pm

Pole fitness classes.... ladies or gents, any one want to join me?

:: 2013 12 November :: 4.14 pm

Why did I waste my time?
Two steps, I don't rewind
Feeling I can't define
I give back to you

Give it all away, take it all away
Give it all away, take it all away

I see my demise
From behind your eyes
I can't pass you by
I put back to you

Give it all away, take it all away
Give it all away, take it all away
Give it all away, take it all away
Give it all away, take it all away

Between love, between hate
Shake the silence back but it's too late
And it haunts you, and it haunts you
It's a love hate heartbreak

This could be suicide
A kiss with these red knives
Why am I driving blind?
I give back to you

Give it all away, take it all away
Give it all away, take it all away

Try on one full size
I thought boys don't cry
You're my perfect lie
I give back to you

Give it all away, take it all away
Give it all away, take it all away
Give it all away, take it all away
Give it all away, take it all away

Between love, between hate
Shake the silence back but it's too late
And it haunts you, and it haunts you
It's a love hate heartbreak

Between love between hate
Shake the silence back but it's too late
And it haunts you, and it haunts you
It's a love hate heartbreak

Between love between hate
Shake the silence back but it's too late
And it haunts you, and it haunts you
It's a love hate heartbreak

Between love between hate
Shake the silence back but it's too late
And it haunts you, and it haunts you
It's a love hate heartbreak

Give it all away, take it all away
Give it all away, take it all away

:: 2013 12 November :: 4.06 pm

Drink the wine, my darling, you said
Take your time, and consume all of it
But the roses were only to drain my inspiration
The promises were spoiled before they left your lips and?

I breathe you in again
Just to feel you underneath my skin
Holding on to the sweet escape
Is always laced with a familiar taste of poison

I tell myself that you're are no good for me
I wish you well, but desire never leaves
I could fight this 'til the end
But maybe I don't want to win

I breathe you in again
Just to feel you underneath my skin
Holding on to the sweet escape
Is always laced with a familiar taste of poison

I don't wanna be saved, I don't wanna be sober
I want you on my mind, in my dreams
Behind these eyes and I won't wake up
No, not this time

I breathe you in again
Just to feel you underneath my skin
Holding on to the sweet escape
Is always laced with a familiar taste of poison
A familiar taste of poison, a familiar taste of poison

:: 2013 12 November :: 4.01 pm

Ohhh, I miss the misery!

I've been a mess since you stayed,
I've been a wreck since you changed,
Don't let me get in your way,
I miss the lies and the pain,
The fights that keep us awake-ake-ake
I'm tellin you!

I miss the bad things,
The way you hate me,
I miss the screaming,
The way that you blame me!
Miss the phone calls,
When it's your fault,
I miss the late nights,
Don't miss you at all!
I like the kick in the face,
And the things you do to me!
I love the way that it hurts!
I don't miss you, I miss the misery!

I've tried but I just can't take it,
I'd rather fight than just fake it (cause I like it
Rough),
You know that I've had enough,
I dare ya to call my bluff,
Can't take to much of a good thing
I'm tellin you!

I miss the bad things,
The way you hate me,
I miss the screaming,
The way that you blame me!
Miss the phone calls,
When it's your fault,
I miss the late nights,
Don't miss you at all!
I like the kick in the face,
And the things you do to me!
I love the way that it hurts!
I don't miss you, I miss the misery!

Just know that I'll make you hurt,
(I miss the lies and the pain what you did to me)
When you tell me you'll make it worse
(I'd rather fight all night than watch the TV)
I hate that feelin inside
You tell me how hard you'll try
But when we're at our worst
I miss the misery

I miss the bad things,
The way you hate me,
I miss the screaming,
The way that you blame me.

I miss the rough sex,
Leaves me a mess,
I miss the feeling of pains in my chest!
Miss the phone calls,
When it's your fault,
I miss the late nights,
Don't miss you at all!
I like the kick in the face,
And the things you do to me!
I love the way that it hurts!
I don't miss you, I miss the misery!

I don't miss you, I miss the misery!

:: 2013 12 November :: 6.35 am

Finally starting to see results of of the effort to lose all the weight I regained. Down 5 lbs. 60 more to go!
Life has taken some interesting turns over the last two weeks, lets see how it continues to go.

:: 2013 10 November :: 9.27 pm

Some parts of the past need to be left in the past.

:: 2013 10 November :: 10.23 am

Still trying to process everything that happened this weekend. Cleared the air between someone who used to be a rather integral part of my life, apologies that were long over due were sincerely given and accepted and then a day of re-establishing the lost friendship occurred. Oh and two nights of drunkery added in to the mix.
Now things with E need to continue getting better and I need to work on some friendships with two awesome people here on woohu.

:: 2013 3 November :: 2.25 pm

Spoke to a counselor at SCC and she says I can retest for my math placement! Refreshing myself with Khans academy. Goal is to make it into at least Pre-Calc. It would be awesome if I could test into Calc I since thats the only one I'm required to take for my Major. If I test into Calc I that means I will only have 6 classes left for my Associates of Biology DTA. Which means I will be done at SCC by next Spring and then I will have 13 classes left at EWU for my Bachelors, unless I take a couple extras at SCC that will transfer directly to EWU ( I have to do a little more investigating in to whether it will or won't)

:: 2013 3 November :: 9.24 am

Wildlife Rehabilitation.... I think that is now my goal to have that be my career. Finishing up my Associate in Biology DTA at SCC then of to EWU for a Biology and Zoology Major.

:: 2013 30 October :: 6.31 am

*bundle of nerves* that's me today.

:: 2013 29 October :: 6.43 am

Coffee Shop interview tomorrow. Lets up I can nail it and that my weight doesn't exclude me. It's not a lingerie one just a regular but now days they can be pretty mean to anyone who isn't relatively thin.

On to good news, I appear to have lost 4 lbs, now to just keep decreasing!

:: 2013 22 October :: 4.39 pm
:: Mood: Devestated

And like that she is gone.

:: 2013 15 October :: 5.32 am

Been trying two take 2 tbsps of coconut oil daily. On to day 3 and I already feel a marked difference. I don't feel as "foggy" as I normally do and I'm loving it.

:: 2013 9 October :: 6.23 am

Sitting down with the father figure today to discuss buying my own business. *fingers crossed* Hopefully he actually helps me do this and I can make a successful run at it.