Once Upon A Dream

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:: 2007 28 February :: 10.34pm

94 days. I can do this.

I just want Nick.

:: 2007 28 February :: 8.47am

Hey.

People were right, after three weeks, this thing is so easy. I still want to go home sometimes but it doesn't hurt as much.

Today is a good day. Nick got a job, my 8 o'clock class was cancelled and my 11 o'clock might be cancelled too. I am tired but happy.

I think I can do this. Only three more months.

:: 2007 26 February :: 11.50pm

my life is a movie that i don't want to watch any more. i just want to hit "stop" already.

:: 2007 23 February :: 2.24pm

mother, i'm tired
come surrender my son
time has ravaged on my soul
no plans to leave but still i go

falling with the leaves
falling out of sleep
to the last goodbyes
who cares why?

mother, i've tried
wasting my life
i haven't given up, i lie
to make you so proud in my eyes

falling out of sleep
crawling over me
to the last goodbyes
who cares why?

tuesday's come and gone
restless still i drive
try to leave it all behind

falling, falling out of sleep
falling, falling with the leaves
i got crawling, crawling over me

once upon a time in my life...

i went falling

:: 2007 22 February :: 12.40pm

Amsterdam was awesome. I want to live there or at tleast go back.

London is alright. It has a different vibe than the rest of Europe. I don't know.

Getting re-used to the keyboard is a pain.

Nick I am online and you aren't. Oh but I just realised that it is almost 8 there. ha ha that is why.

Stupid time difference.

Anyway, having fun, going to a musical tonight.

I love you.

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:: 2007 20 February :: 5.17pm

the past 5 months have found me repeatedly asking, "what the fuck?"

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:: 2007 15 February :: 11.02am

My parents are adorable.

I talked to my mom and dad yesterday. I mentioned to them both that I am usually on msn messenger after dinner so my mom got a hotmail account and had my sister teach her how to use it.

AND THEN my mom offered to buy Nick Vonage so he could call me.

AND THEN my dad said that after he goes to China and everything, he'll stop by and see me. Like Europe is down the street from Taiwan.

I love them.

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:: 2007 14 February :: 9.05pm

I am pretty sure France is trying to kill me.

So far,

I have almost gotten hit by billions of cars (that is sort of my fault as I pull the European and just walk out in the middle of traffic).

I fell down on the bus and now have massive zombie rot on my leg/thigh (so massive that I cannot lay on that side of my body).

I just almost fell out of the 24 yr old's bedroom window (He left his shutters open when he left and it is really windy so I went to shut them. I grabbed one and I sort of left it there and went to stuggle with the other shutter which the wind had an excellent hold of. In my stuggle, I leaned out to get better leverage on the left shutter and the right one swung around and hit me in the arm. Another bruise.)

Maybe the right side of my body is just not meshing well with France.

Anyway, I love you.

:: 2007 14 February :: 8.55am

Well our first class was cancelled which means I got up at 6 to take the bus at 7 for NO REASON. We don't have class until 10.

The weather here is awesome. It rained the other day but then cleared up and was beautiful.

I love you all.

:: 2007 13 February :: 5.22pm

tori amos: blood roses
blood roses
blood roses
back on the street now
can't forget the things you never said
on days like these starts me thinking
chickens get a taste of your meat, girl
chickens get a taste of your meat, yes

you gave him your blood
and your warm little diamond
he likes killing you after you're dead
you think i'm a queer
i think you're a queer
said, i think you're a queer
i think you're a queer
i shaved every place where you been, boy
said, i shaved every place where you been, yes

god knows
i know
i've thrown away those graces

the belle of new orleans
tried to show me once
how to tango
wrapped around your feet
wrapped around like good little roses

blood roses
blood roses
back on the street now
now you've cut out the flute
from the throat of the loon
at least when you cry now
he can't even hear you

when chickens get a taste of your meat
come on, come on, come on, come on
when he sucks you deep
sometimes you're nothing but meat

:: 2007 13 February :: 5.10pm

look, here's the deal:

we're all the same.... we all wish we had more excitement and variation in our lives but don't because we're slaves. we all want to run away and do something new and different. we all wonder what life "could" be like. blah blah blah. but routine is life. and life is routine. get used to it. it sucks. you're either deaf, blind, anorexic, depressed, bi-polar, infertile, alcoholic, overweight, disabled, schizophrenic, obsessive-compulsive, avoidant, dependent, narcissistic, a minority, poor, or someone you care about is, and it makes your life fucked up.

or if you're part of the the lucky 1% of the world, you're rich.

otherwise, you have to work every day for most of your life or you'll be assassinated for not believing in capitalism and/or starve to death. or you'll be blown up by the U.S. military.

people don't commit suicide for nothing.

something funny i stumbled upon...

:: 2007 11 February :: 8.57pm

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Here are some videos also.

:: 2007 11 February :: 11.25pm

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:: 2007 11 February :: 11.03pm

I am slowly getting pictures up. I remembered that I have a flikr account.

I am getting tired of naming them. Here they are. I am going to bed soon so I am stopping for the night.

:: 2007 11 February :: 9.49pm
:: Music: Take Your Medicine by Cloud Cult

You can take it in stride or you can take in right between your eyes
Cloud Cult released a new album! First priority (after chili dogs, cheesecakes and mad makeouts with Nick) once I get back. I hope not all that stuff happens on the same day because I am getting bloaty just thinking about it. Gross.

Anyway, you can stream some songs off their website so that is what I am doing to distract myself from my 8 o'clock class tomorrow (which requires me to get up at 6 and catch the bus at 7:03).