.. i love this movie
Young Noah: You're bored Allie. You're bored and you know it. You wouldn't be here if you weren't.

Young Allie: You arrogant son of a bitch.

Young Noah: Would you just stay with me?

Young Allie: Stay with you? What for? Look at us, we're already fightin'

Young Noah: Well that's what we do, we fight... You tell me when I am being an arrogant son of a bitch and I tell you when you are a pain in the ass. Which you are, 99% of the time. I'm not afraid to hurt your feelings. You have like a 2 second rebound rate, then you're back doing the next pain-in-the-ass thing.

Young Allie: So what?

Young Noah: So it's not gonna be easy. It's gonna be really hard. We're gonna have to work at this every day, but I want to do that because I want you. I want all of you, for ever, you and me, every day.

the worst fucking day ever
so yesterday was a horrible day... i got lost and wound up on I-75... n my car just randomly stopped... a car almost crashed into me .. i pulled over ... my car wouldn't start ... had to call my parents... stayed on the side of the rode for 2 hrs till they got there... while i was waiting by myself some freaky guy stopped and tried to get in my car.. eventually he left... we had to call a tow truck ... the car was leaking oil.. short of water.. and we think the motor's fucked up .. which is over 1000 to fix... the tow truck cost 120 dollars back to my house... i paid that wit my savings n my step dad helped... so yea ... i have to ride the bus from now on until my car gets fixed .. which wont be until they move into the new house at the end of sept... they have to drive me to work when the can.. otherwise i just can't go ... i can't go out unless someone can give me a ride... oh yea and the tow truck guy had never been to tampa so he had no idea where he was going ... he got lost... we didnt get home till midnight ... and my grandma has not stopped yelling at me ... so yea .. great day :).

i'm loving this song... so sad
Because of You by kelly clarkson

I will not make the same mistakes that you did
I will not let myself cause my heart so much misery
I will not break the way you did
You fell so hard
I've learned the hard way, to never let it get that far

Because of you
I never stray too far from the sidewalk
Because of you
I learned to play on the safe side
So I don't get hurt
Because of you
I find it hard to trust
Not only me, but everyone around me
Because of you
I am afraid

I lose my way
And it's not too long before you point it out
I cannot cry
Because I know that's weakness in your eyes
I'm forced to fake a smile, a laugh
Every day of my life
My heart can't possibly break
When it wasn't even whole to start with

Because of you
I never stray too far from the sidewalk
Because of you
I learned to play on the safe side
So I don't get hurt
Because of you
I find it hard to trust
Not only me, but everyone around me
Because of you
I am afraid

I watched you die
I heard you cry
Every night in your sleep
I was so young
You should have known better than to lean on me
You never thought of anyone else
You just saw your pain
And now I cry
In the middle of the night
For the same damn thing

Because of you
I never stray too far from the sidewalk
Because of you
I learned to play on the safe side
So I don't get hurt
Because of you
I tried my hardest just to forget everything
Because of you
I don't know how to let anyone else in
Because of you
I'm ashamed of my life because it's empty
Because of you
I am afraid

Because of you
Because of you

wow... great song.. she has an amazing voice
Skin by alexz johnson (instant star)

I drift away to a place
Another kind of life
Take away the pain
I create my paradise

Everything I've held
Has hit the wall
What used to be yours
Isn't yours at all

Falling apart, and all that I'm asking
Is it a crime, am I overreacting

Oh, he's under my skin
Just give me something to get rid of him
I've got a reason now to bury this alive
Another little white lie

What you had didn't fit
Among the pretty things
But never fear, never fear
I now know where you've been

Braids have been un-tied
Ribbons fall away
Leave the consequence
But my tears you'll taste

Falling apart and all that I question
Is this a dream or is this my lesson

Oh, he's under my skin
Just give me something to get rid of him
I've got a reason now to bury this alive
Another little white lie

I don't believe I'll be alright
I don't believe I'll be OK
I don't believe how you throw me away
I do believe you didn't try
I do blame you for every lie
When I look in your eyes, I don't see mine

Oh, he's under my skin
Just give me something to get rid of him
I've got a reason now to bury this alive
Another little white lie

Oh my permission to sin
You might have started my reckoning
I've got a reason now to bury him alive
Another little white lie

.. how pretty
A. beautiful. mistake. by. the. ataris.

Maybe I'm not ready for this, and you know it.
Maybe I'm too scared to tell you what I'm really thinking
It's not fair to stay together because of regrets we might have.
I don't want to fall asleep alone, but do I want to wake up with you?
I'm only trying to be completely honest.

So I guess this is the ending or a beautiful mistake.
And if we both agree that we shouldn't be together why does it hurt so much?
I feel like I lost my closest friend.
I don't want to fall asleep alone, but do I want to wake up with you?
I hope you're happy and completely lonely.

There I am standing all alone on Sydney Harbor Bridge.
And you know I would jump into the fucking ocean if it meant I was truly capable of being satisfied.
Will I ever be?
Did I just give up the best thing I ever had?

I don't want to fall asleep alone, but do I want to wake up with you?
I hope you're happy and completely lonely.
I don't want to fall asleep alone, but do I want to wake up with you?
I'm only trying to be completely honest.

my new favorite song.. it's been a while i know .. i'll write soon
Don't Lie
by Black Eyed Peas

[WILL]
Hey, baby my nose is getting big
I noticed it be growing when I been telling them fibs
Now you say your trust's getting weaker
Probably coz my lies just started getting deeper
And the reason for my confession is that I learn my lesson
And I really think you have to know the truth
Because I lied and I cheated and I lied a little more
But after I did it I don't know what I did it for
I admit that I have been a little immature
Fucking with your heart like I was the predator
In my book of lies I was the editor
And the author
I forged my signature
And now I apologize for what I did to you
Cos what you did to me I did to you

[FERGIE]
Nononono baby, nononono don't lie
Nononono, yeah you kno know know know you gotta try
What you gonna do when it all comes out
When I see you & what you're all about

Nonono baby, nononono don't lie
Yeah you kno you kno you kno you kno you know you gotta try

[APL]
b>She said I'm leaving
Cos she can't take the pain
It's hard to continue this love it ain't the same
Can't forget the things that I've done inside her brain
Too many lies committed too many games
She feeling like a fool getting on the last train
Trying to maintain but the feeling won't change
I'm sorry for the things that I've done and what I became
Caught up in living my life in the fast lane
Blinded by lights, cameras, you know the fame
I don't know the reason why I did these things

[APL and FERGIE]
And I lie and I lie and I lie and I lie
And now our emotions are drained
Cos I lie and I lie and a little lie lie
And now your emotions are drained

[FERGIE]
Nononono baby, nononono don't lie (no, don't you lie)
Nononono, yeah you know know know know you gotta try (got to try, got to try)
What you gonna do when it all comes out (what you gonna do baby)
When I see you & what you're all about
Nonono babe, nononono don't lie
Because you kno you kno you kno you kno you know gotta try

Ooh ooh ooh, ooh ooh ooh ooh
Ba da ba da ba da ba da badabada

[TABOO]
Yo, I'm lying to my girl
Even though I love her
And she all in my world
I give her all my attention and diamonds & pearls
She's the one who makes me feel on top of the world
Still Im lieing to my girl, I do it

[APL and FERGIE]
And I lie and I lie and I lie till there's no turning back
I don't know why, (and I lie and I lie till I don't know who I am)

*sigh* this fleeting summer.. oh how i wish it would stay.
well long time no update. srry.. i've been really busy.. workin .. and.. more workin... i dont really feel like sitting around and typin everything that's gone on since hte last time i updated but .. suffice it to say .. a lot's been going thru my mind.. the good .. the bad.. the utterly confusing... *sigh* ... im so ready to graduate and leave this petty bullshit behind. i miss colin. it's so hard to trust him. then again... that's not really my fault. anyways.. not all that much has changed.. im still not ready for summer to be over.. im still desperately clinging to the last tastes of summer... god i love vacation.. school is seriously killing me .. it needs to be over.. im just so glad my gpa freezes after first semester.. u know what that means? PROCRASTINATION UP THE WAZOO! woot! since i last updated.. i've taken my senior pictures.. i dont get em for like another week or so.. prolly not till school starts... tom was there when i went to take em.. hehe he's a funny kid ... today's my day off! i know im really random but that's what those little dots mean.. it means my head is spinning and im trying to think of the next thing i've been meaning to type in here.. but anywyas ..after today i wont have a day off till friday.. so ima go shoppin as soon as my mom comes home.. ima stop by westshore.. i've been to international a lot lately.. forever 21 and dilliard's rock my sox.. i've spent so much money though.. agh... i need a cute pair of jeans.. i now own like 5 skirts hehe .. that's all i've been buying and cute shirts... oh wellz.. now i just gotta find jeans that fit.. so ima stop by jcpenney.. i like their jeans.. and htey're pretty cheap. so ya.. umm that's pretty much all i had to sya really... ima go back to listening and downloading music.. gosh i need an ipod so bad... but anyways i'll try and update more frequently ... oh yea and colin... happy belated anniversary... i dont even know if u remembered but w/e. bye bye.

tonite's song: swing life away by rise against - i mite post the lyrics later.. such a purdy song :)

i just downloaded a shitload of songs so i just thought i'd post the lyrics of the ones i actually really like :) .. so yea .. umm enjoy hehe
The Closest Thing by The Julianna Theory

You're the words that come out easy,
And I am speechless at best.
Your star it seems to shine above the rest.
You're the face before the cameras,
The smile i'd like to earn.
The closest thing to perfect,
In a hollywood to burn.
You're the beauty that is deeper,
Than eyes can merely see.
The closest thing to perfect.
But the farthest thing from me.

Chorus: (x2)
I'd love to be,
The shoulder that you cry on.
I'd love to be,
The friend you call when things are great.

You're the dream that hasn't ended,
And I'm still anxious for rest.
Your words they seem to hang above my head.
You're the bud before the flower,
Unfurls into full bloom.
Captivating beauty,
But it maybe all too soon.
You're the song that writes a story,
But leaves alot to read.
The closest thing to perfect,
But the farthest thing from me.

Chorus: (x2)

And like I really deserve a chance to,
Sit across the table,
And tell you that I think you're wonderful.
And I think you're something special.
I guess this is my only chance to,
Say I wish I knew you,
Because I'm sure you're wonderful,
If I'd get to know you.
--------------------------------------------------------
The Luckiest by Ben Folds Five

I don't get many things right the first time
In fact, I am told that a lot
Now I know all the wrong turns, the stumbles and falls
Brought me here

And where was I before the day
That I first saw your lovely face?
Now I see it everyday
And I know

That I am
I am, I am
The luckiest

What if I'd been born fifty years before you
In a house on the street where you live?
Maybe I'd be outside as you passed on your bike
Would I know?

And in a wide sea of eyes
I see one pair that I recognize
And I know

That I am
I am, I am
The luckiest

I love you more than I have ever found a way to say to you

Next door there's an old man who lived to his nineties
And one day passed away in his sleep
His wife, she stayed for a couple of days
And passed away

I'm sorry, I know that's a
strange way to tell you that I know
we belong
That I know
That I am
I am, I am
The luckiest

That I know
That I am
I am, I am
The luckiest
--------------------------------------------------------
Giving It Away by Mae

By the way you brought me here,
It makes believe,
the best is still yet to come,
and I don't want to leave.
Forgive my hesitation but I'm learning to trust in you.
Help me to dream these dreams
because I don't have a clue.

If you'd be honest and say what you mean you know I
would promise I'd do anything
because I know that without you I'm giving it away.

Is this what you wanted?
Cause I'm willing to change.
Now that I'm certain,
there's much more to gain.
You've introduced me to the moment
but I'm looking to stay for good.
You asked me to stay forever.
Well, you know that
I would, I would do anything.

If you'd be honest and say what you mean you know
I would promise I'd do anything
because I know that without you I'm giving it away.

The nights are forever and maybe I'm wrong,
but it feels like I'm so lost without you.
So I step towards the heat, it's the way I can see,
and it makes me believe that it's you.

And by the way you brought me here it makes me believe the best is still yet to come
and I don't want to leave, I won't, but anyway...

If you'd be honest and say what you mean you know
I would promise I'd do anything
because I know that without you I'm giving it away.

The nights are forever.
I can't get to sleep cause I know there's a reason.
I'm in this too deep and I'm sure that without you,
I'm giving it away.
Yeah.

X12
Woo Hoo
I’m Giving it away...
Giving it away...
Giving it away..
--------------------------------------------------
Sweet Avenue by Jets to Brazil

Tasting you and rain
I walk down to the train
try not to look down
this day could someday be an anniversary
everything is light and sound
facing forwards going slowly wait for you to show me
where this train wants to go
living by the hour i stopped for every flower
everything is soft and slow
now all these tastes improve
through the view that comes with you
like they handed me my life
for the first time it felt right

thank you for making me see there's a life in me
it was dying to get out
holding you we make two spoons beneath an april moon
everything is soft and sweet

this cigarette it could seduce a nation with its smoke
crawling down my tired throat
scratches part of me that's purring
softly stirring
i'm captain of industry smoking famously
feet up on the windowsill
looking at all these trees i feel affinity with
everything so soft and still-budding at my fingertips
touching you i start to bloom
alive with trains and passing ships
soft and sweet along your lips now
i go "oh wow"

thank you for taking me from my monastary
i was dying to get out
with tears of gratitude
i like my latitude

a cross town train to you
now all these tastes improve
through the view that comes with you
like they handed me my life
for the first time it felt worth it
like i deserved it
--------------------------------------------------
Come Back to Bed by John Mayer (the best lyricist i have heard in quite a while) i love this man!

Still is the life
Of your room when you're not inside
All of your things tell the sweetest story line
Your tears on these sheets
And your footsteps are down the hall
Tell me what I did
I can't find where the moment went wrong at all

You can be mad in the morning
I'll take back what I said
Just don't leave me alone here
It's cold, baby
Come back to bed
Come back to bed
Come back to bed
Come back to bed
(come on back to me)

What will this fix
You know you're not a quick forgive
And I won't sleep through this
I survive on the breath you are finished with

You can be mad in the morning
I'll take back what I said
Just don't leave me alone here
It's cold, baby
Come back to bed
Come back to bed
Come back to bed
Come back to bed

You can be mad in the morning
Or the afternoon instead
But don't leave me
98 and 6 degrees of separation from you, baby
Come back to bed
Come back to bed
Come back to bed
Why dont you come back to bed?

Don't hold your love over my head
Don't hold your love over my head
Don't hold your love over my head
Don't hold your love over my head
Don't hold your love over my head
Don't hold your love...
----------------------------------------------------
Excerpts from Random Notes Strewn Across the Floor by Cursive

why i should leave...
no
why i'm leaving you...
for him
well let's see here...
well, let's see
where should i...
begin?

everynight you get annihilated with all your friends
and everynight i drink aloneuntil you stumble in the morning sun
it's a fuck and run
i know see it all i see it in the eyes of those girls
those fucking girls they smile and nod
but never a single word
i'm just in the way
i'm the ball and chain
you're the jailbird chirping how
hard life is in the cage
and how hard it is waking up next to me...

well, you've dug this hole
come on and fill me up
when you said you loved me
i knew i was getting fucked
you said you'd never let go
all that stopped;
you used to turn me on, now we're just getting off
thats why i'm leaving you

you really really think that guy is gonna make it alright
since you told me you could never be in love with another man
oh but this one is it
but i remember when we met we knew that it was the end
yeah i remember i remember i remember
all those things
not everything
summer haircuts
dollar movies

we used to sneak a six-pack in your bag
and wait for a girl to scream or a car to crash
so we could crack open our cans
and the time you shaved my head in the front yard
a passerby stopped to take a picture
we ended up in the paper
and now you wanna leave
well maybe i forgot a couple things
it doesn't mean i don't remember how it feels
when you're lying naked next to me

valentine
i want to feel your hips pressed up against mine
we'll push into eachother
love's alive
it might be fleeting but it's ours, it's tonight
so won't you reconsider
love's lost lives
you might be lonely,
but i'm still by your side
you might have to leave
but not tonight

random survey i took from yara's journal
1. First Name: thaimi
2. Were you named after anyone? yep a cuban actress
3. Do you wish on stars? occasionally.. it's nice to think someone's actually up there listening..
4. When was the last time you cried? last nite
5. Do you like your handwriting? oh god no hehe
6. What is your favorite lunch meat? turkey duh!
7. What is your birth date? nov. 4, 1987
8. What is your most embarrassing CD? well let's see.. i own every cd nsync ever came out with.. except for their christmas album.. haha i accidentally sat on that and broke it.. haha
9. If you were another person, would YOU be friends
with you? of course! im the coolest person i know!
10. Are you a daredevil? haha psh no
11. Who is your favorite cartoon character? "im ready im ready im ready! hehe .. spongebob of course!
12. Do looks matter? to some extent
13. How do you release anger? i dont.. i stay silent and just kinda let it build up
14.. Where is your second home? school
15. Do you trust others easily? not at all..
16. What was your favorite toy as a child? this doll my dad had bought me while he was in russia.. i loved that thing.
17. What class in high school do you t hink was
totally useless? chemistry.. algebra.. geometry... basically anything involving math beyond the point of addition and subtraction
18. Do you have a journal? yep yep
19. Do you use sarcasm a lot? not a day goes by that i dont make some sort of smartass remark hehe.
20. What are your nicknames? thaimi whaimi, thai, timmy, feena weena.. oh god D .. hehe
21.Would you bungee jump? hell yea!
22. Do you untie your shoes when you take them off? i dont really wear sneakers but yea when i do i untie them
23. Do you think that you are strong? yes.. more emotionally and mentally than physically.
24. What is your favorite ice cream flavor? chocolate chip cookie dough :D
25. Shoe Size? 6 and a 1/2
26. Red or pink? pink all the way
27. What is your least favorite thing about yourself? my fatty tummy hehe
28. Who do you miss the most? .. well that's an easy one.. my baby.
29. Do you want everyone you send this to, to send it
back? umm.. i didnt send it to anyone but u can repost it in ur journal if ya want :D
30. What color pants and shoes are you wearing? im wearin light yellow pj pants wit teddy bears and hearts on em hehe .. and pink flip flops
31. What are you listening to right now? tim mcgraw - it's your love
32. Last thing you ate? sonic milkshake .. ehhl it made me feel sick
33. If you were a color what would you be? baby blue
34. What is the weather like right now? hot and humid.. it's florida.. come on now
35. Last person you talked to on the phone? shilpster :P
36. The first thing you notice about the opposite sex? eyes and smile..
37. Do you like the person who sent this to you? well i got it from yara's journal.. and i guess shes' alrite.. hehe im jp
38. Favorite Drink? its a tie between orange juice, apple juice, and pink lemonade :)
39. Favorite Sport? haha that's funny!
40. Hair Color? brown .. kinda light.. but hopefully it'll be red soon :D
41. Eye Color? chestnut brown
42. Do you wear contacts? yeah clear ones
43. Favorite Food? chocolate
44. Last Movie You Watched? the notebook
45. Favorite Day of the Year? My bday.. and christmas!
46. Scary Movies or Happy Endings? happy endings :) im a sucker for a good love story hehe
47. Summer or Winter? winter.. summer's way to fuckin hot!
49. What Is Your Favorite Dessert? hmm... brownies.. :)
50. Who Is Most Likely To Respond? ... didnt send it to anyone
51. Who Is Least Likely To Respond? ditto
52. Living Arrangements? mom, step dad, sister, brother, and grandma.. all in one big happy home... haha yea ok.. i couldn't get that out wit a straight face :P
53. What Books Are You Reading? i started huckleberry finn like 4 weeks ago.. i've yet to get past pg 10 hehe
54. What's On Your Mouse Pad? the road runner
55. What Did You Watch Last night on TV? haha this is really sad but that's so raven.. i can't help it .. it's a good show!
56. Favorite Smells? guy's cologne and chocolate .. yum!
57. Favorite Flower? pink roses
58. Rolling Stones or Beatles? ... neither?
59. What's the furthest you've been from home? cali

such a purdyful song : )
i told u guys i would post the lyrics to this song in a previous journal entry so yep here it is.. enjoy.. and download the song por favor :D

Wonderwall
by Oasis

Today is gonna be the day
That they're gonna throw it back to you
By now you should've somehow
Realized what you gotta do
I don't believe that anybody
Feels the way I do
About you now

Backbeat the word is on the street
That the fire in your heart is out
I'm sure you've heard it all before
But you never really had a doubt
I don't believe that anybody
Feels the way I do
about you now

And all the roads we have to walk are winding
And all the lights that lead us there are blinding
There are many things that I would
Like to say to you
But I don't know how

Because maybe
You're gonna be the one that saves me
And after all
You're my wonderwall

Today was gonna be the day
But they'll never throw it back to you
By now you should've somehow
Realized what you're not to do
I don't believe that anybody
Feels the way I do
About you now

And all the roads that lead you there were winding
And all the lights that light the way are blinding
There are many things that I would like to say to you
But I don't know how

I said maybe
You're gonna be the one that saves me
And after all
You're my wonderwall

I said maybe (I said maybe)
You're gonna be the one that saves me
And after all
You're my wonderwall

I said maybe (I said maybe)
You're gonna be the one that saves me (that saves me) 3X

recap time!
so that's it... he's gone.. until around august the 8th... this blows. im really gonna miss him...

i found out terrible news last nite.. my aunt the one in miami.. has hepatitis C ... she went in for regular blood tests... and my uncle got a phone call last nite telling him that she had that disease.. he hasn't told her yet ... he doesn't want her to mope around the house and think that she's gonna die.. so he set up an appointment with a liver specialist.. *the disease attacks the liver* and the doctor's gonna check how far along the disease is.. he's not gonna tell her that she's sick until the day before.. i dont know that that's the best thing for him to do. she's not a little girl.. i mean she's a grown woman .. she's strong.. this is just so awful... my grandma and my mom were crying last nite... i felt terrible... i mean she's such an amazing person u know? so giving... such a huge part of our family .. and i can't even think of what's gonna happen to my cousins and my uncle if she were to go... my uncle would be miserable... god i really hope the disease isn't far along at all and that with some medicine she can begin to lead a normal life and not be affected by the disease... for some reason i can't help but realize that this situation seems to freakishly mirror what happened when my mom was diagnosed with cancer a few years ago. ever since i found out last nite .. i've just been trying to keep it out of my head and not focus on it or what could happen.. it's just too scary and upsetting...

that said.. im gonna try and change the subject.

i told myself i would spend all of today doing nothing but latin hw.. cuz im sposed to have finished the class by today... but i haven't .. i just can't bring myself to sit down and log on and do hw... i just dont want to! .. agh .. im so sick of this school bullshit. college applications.. essays.. extended essay.. cas hours... im sick of it all... i want it to be all over with. i wanna have a career and just have my life set and stable.. without all of this meaningless crap.

so yea.. as i sit here eating some strawberry yogurt.. i am continuing to avoid this latin shit. it's irritating me that im so lazy but i just dont want to fucking do it.. so w/e.

but yea that's pretty much all i have to say .. it doesn't feel like 8 o clock.. it feels really early... i went shopping today :D .. i bought a really cute jean skirt from body shop and two really cute tank tops from wet seal... they were buy one get one free! ... charlotte russe was having an amazing sale.. buy 1 and get 2 free. ... it was crazy! but the clothes were kind of ugly so i guess that's y they were havin such a crazy sale. but yea that was fun. i didnt buy any cute bras like i had wanted to but i think i'll just buy those some other time...

okies well there's my update of the week hehe .. enjoy :D

tonite's song: banana pancakes by jack jonshon

hehe aww colin's like obsessed with jack johnson .. who btw.. sounds a whole lot like john mayer but he refuses to admit it hehe... on wednesday.. before we went to the beach he made me pancakes for breakfast.. it was so cute... hahaha omg it was so funny .. when we were eating lunch at the beach.. *he packed us a lunch* .. he pointed at something with the hand that he was holding his sandwich in.. and BAM! this sea gull swoops down and takes the sandwich away from colin and flies away! hahahahah omg i laughed so hard.. he was so pissed off! he started throwing rocks at them hehe.. i thought it was hilarious but somehow he wasn't quite so tickled hehe... ok ok now im done with the entry.. hehe srry didnt mean to carry on... nite nite everyone :D

im sick and tired of this bullshit
wtf! it's like no matter how hard i fucking try i can't get away from her.. and wat she represents. i mean the day of senior send off i was so happy that i would never have to see her again.. and since then i've seen the bitch twice already... i just wish she'd go away... for good. god and when we ran into her .. ehhl.. u should've seen the fucking hope in her eyes.. so excited to see him again.. she sickens me. its like wtf.. move the fuck on .. he has... i just dont get it. and like ... its awful.. but when i see the way she looks at him.. i can almost picture what happened that night.. just thinking about it makes my insides turn to mush... i hate her. i've never hated anyone so much in my entire life. i dont even know her and i hate her. well.. so much for taking advantage of the victoria's secret sale... psh u can bet ima be going to citrus a whole lot less now.. ok well i just needed to vent a little bit because i've been really irritated and upset all day. i hate that she has that fucking power. but anyways.. i'll update some other time.

tonite's song- maybe i deserve by tank

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ooh, yeah, yeah (well,well,well,well)
do you mind if I tell the truth for a second ya'll (tell the truth)
Hey,hey
No,no,no

Verse 1:
Maybe I deserve,
to wonder who's callin so damn late
for you to say I'm trippin,
just a homie from up-state (said it's just a homie)
Don't he know, it's one o'clock in the mornin'?
Say it's cool, baby it's cool

Maybe I deserve,
For you to say he's comin into town (later on this
evenin')
and he was just wonderin' if you and him could hang out (oh ho ho)
I don't like it
I know I gotta trust you
It ain't cool, 'cuz I know it's true

Chorus:
Maybe I deserve
for you to go out and find some other guy
maybe I deserve
for you to stay out with him all night
maybe I deserve
for you to do all the things I did to you
Maybe I deserve (oh yeah)
maybe I deserve (oh yeah)
(Repeat 2x's)

Verse 2:
Maybe I deserve
for you to put on, a sexy dress
for me to ask you, who the hell you tryna impress ( who the hell you tryina impress)
for you to laugh it off, like it ain't nothin'
I know it's it's somethin, maybe
Maybe I deserve (just maybe yeah)
to sit at home and wonder where you are
is he kissin' you, touchin' you, holdin' you, what
to take a drink to help ease my mind
i wanna be mad after all those times

Chorus (Repeat 2x's)

verse 3:
Maybe I deserve
for me to ask you, where you been (where the hell you been)
Maybe I deserve
for you to say I betta stop trippin (oh oh I'm gone trip)
Maybe I deserve
To grab yo neck, until you let me know
Maybe I deserve
for you to run cryin', cryin' out the door
Maybe I deserve
to grab my coat and chase you down the street
Maybe I deserve
to say it's not you, it's my own insecurity's yeah (is it yeah)
Maybe I deserve
for you to say, yes I cheated on you
Maybe I deserve
I won't care 'cuz after all I put you through maybe I
deserve-serve girl oh ho
to be mistreated sometimes
Maybe I deserve
to even be lied to sometimes (yeah,yeah,yeah)
Maybe I deserve
(maybe), maybe you should go cheat on me
Maybe I deserve
ooooh
(maybe I deserve)
(maybe I deserve)
(maybe I deserve)
Maybe I should sit and wait by the phone
Maybe I deserve
'cuz I done paged you about three or four times
Maybe I deserve
girl I know, girl I know I done put you through it baby
(put you through hell)
Maybe I deserve
wanna know can I, can I know can I maybe I deserve

See we men can't take
another man praisin our woman
ooh no,no
we can't even stand waitin by the phone (uh)
but we do the same shit
oh damn, oh damn, oh damn
I know I deserve it
but right now, I hate you so much right now
but i should hate myself instead

yummy :)
damn it always feels so good to log on to hotmail and just out of nowhere decide to check ur junkmail.. and realize u've got a bunch of really sweet emails u didnt even notice u were receiving :) .. nice emails make me happy :D hehe. im such a dork.. i just got back from seeing colin.. it was lots of fun.. today's his little sister's bday .. happy bday danielle :D ... i gtg to work in a little bit .. so yea that kinda stinks but it's ok ... umm yea so im just online chatting to ppls ... i'll update more at some other point this week .. tah tah :) hehe i've always wanted to say that :P

tonite's song: wonderwall by oasis... i love that song! .. ima post the lyrics later .. so purdyful! but for now.. do urself a favor and download it.

a quick update...
oh yea .. srry i know i said i was through babbling for the night but i just realized something... tomorrow's our anniversary.. i had honestly completely forgotten about it. i believe that makes 1 yr and 4 months. damn .. time's really moving rite along baby. its nice to realize that we're actually making this crazy shit work.. that makes me so happy. but yea.. so i was just updating to say:

HAPPY ANNIVERSARY SWEETHEART! i love u so much and i dont know where i'd be without you. you're my love... my one... my best friend. thank u for being in my life.