::
2004 30 April :: 7.11 am
:: Mood: tired
:: Music: brand new - sic transit gloria...glory fades
track is getting to the point where the practices are starting to hurt becuase you are still sore from yesterday and the muscle fatigue is setting in. i stayed after practice yesterday to watch eric high-jump for a few minutes then he gave me a ride back to school like usual. doctor says i need to rest my knee, which will happen over the weekend. ugh...yesterday in health romero takes my notebook and trys to read/sing some of the songs i wrote (bad bad bad, i don't like people to read stuff unless i have it posted somewhere) but it was bad, he tried singing them like rap songs, so then i sang them to him how they are in my head and he's like, "thats not music".....to each his own i guess motherfucker.
first breath after coma |
::
2004 28 April :: 8.02 pm
only one
Broken this fragile thing now
And I can't, I can't pick up the pieces
And I've thrown my words all around
But I can't, I can't give you a reason
I feel so broken up (so broken up)
And I give up (I give up)
I just want to tell you so you know
Here I go, scream my lungs out and try to get to you
You are my only one
I let go, there's just no one that gets me like you do
You are my only, my only one
Made my mistakes, let you down
And I can't, I can't hold on for too long
Ran my whole life in the ground
And I can't, I can't get up when you're gone
And something's breaking up (breaking up)
I feel like giving up (like giving up)
I won't walk out until you know
Here I go, scream my lungs out and try to get to you
You are my only one
I let go, there's just no one who gets me like you do
You are my only my only one
Here I go so dishonestly
Leave a note for you my only one
And I know you can see right through me
So let me go and you will find someone
Here I go, scream my lungs out and try to get to you
You are my only one
I let go, there's just no one, no one like you
You are my only, my only one
My only one
My only one
My only one
You are my only, my only one
first breath after coma |
::
2004 27 April :: 10.05 pm
:: Mood: in pain
:: Music: yellowcard - only one
so yea, if you've read jack's journal then you have most likely heard about our little bet. i am about 95% sure that jack will win the bet. jack is a great guy and any girl who would go out with him is very very lucky.
i guess i've kinda accepted the fact that girls just don't like me and i pretty much have a zero chance of having a relationship. yea, i'm think its kinda bad when you yourself realize that. the thing that puzzles me though, is that if you compare me to some other guys, i'm guess i'm kinda close to them, but they all have girlfriends and here i am single. i'm creative, i'm decently talented at music, i think i have good taste in music and style of other things. from what some people have told me, i'm caring, sweet, nice, sensitive, and what is sad but true, i am willing to do anything for others, even if i don't like that person too much. then i thought of my flaws and problems and that outweighs my good things. i'm short, i'm not very attractive at all, i'm really weird and odd, i tend to complain about a lot of things, i hate myself most of the time and basicly i'm just me and no one really likes that.
one bad thing i found, i'm happier when i'm slightly depressed, if that makes any sense. i figure that things can only get worse from here and i accept that. when i'm happy, i tend to wait for things to go bad because they always do...
Here I go, scream my lungs out and try to get to you
You are my only one
I let go, there's just no one, no one like you
You are my only, my only one
My only one
My only one
My only one
You are my only, my only one
i wish...
4 breaths |
first breath after coma |
::
2004 27 April :: 7.58 pm
and every time you fed the line "you mean so much to me" i'm without you...
first breath after coma |
::
2004 27 April :: 7.23 am
and if you ever said you missed me then don't say you've never lied...
first breath after coma |
::
2004 25 April :: 2.31 pm
and die young and save yourself....
4 breaths |
first breath after coma |
|