::
2004 17 April :: 6.06 pm
:: Mood: tired
:: Music: michelle branch - everywhere (acoustic)
pat and i went and saw the punisher last night. it was good. then i went and slept over at pat's house. we stayed up the whole night, now today i am like dead tired.
so i'm taking this quiz and one of the questions made me think. the question and possible answers were:
Your perfect guy/girl would most likely be:
1. Someone who accepts you
2. Someone who agrees with you
3. Someone who thinks outside the box
4. Someone who likes the same stuff you do. Involved with the same stuff you are
5. Someone with the same aspirations and dreams as you. High ambition!
6. Someone who respects you
so i picked numbers 1, 4 and 6 although number 4 is not as important as the others.
then i started thinking of what i look for in a girl and it brought me to a conversation jack and i had a while back.
thescreamoamigo: ok, i want a hot, emo girl around my height
thescreamoamigo: and a messanger bag
thescreamoamigo: and listens to most of the music i listen to
thescreamoamigo: its that too much to ask for?
InotGuitarded: yes
InotGuitarded: thats like u
InotGuitarded: but female
thescreamoamigo: lol
thats partly what i would like.
one thing i have found out is that people don't really know that much about me, and that kinda bothers me, so people, ask me questions, it kills boredom anyway.
i don't know what you would call this, but i came up with it back in january. i think it sucks but oh well, you be the judge.
beach, sand, water, air, salt, wind, blowing, sunset, warmth, holding, comfort, feeling, blue, orange, red, greys, spraying, clear, stars, moon, holding, "love", "forever", stencil, wash over, dreams, cold, alone, forgotten, insomnia, alone ,black, grey, cold, wet, washed over, beaten down.
first breath after coma |
::
2004 15 April :: 11.19 pm
| andy is...: | awesome | | you're...: | a waste | | i like monkies: | ok? | | band is...: | good | | can sex wait: | sure | | most horrible word...: | ? | | 'love' is used too often: | yes | | speaking in rhyme is...: | annoying | | woohu is...: | yay! | | football is...: | fun | | is cheerleading a sport?: | no | | blondes are...: | blonde | | midgets are...: | short | | you hate...: | people in general | | bananas are...: | yellow | | sunsets are...: | my favorite | | tattoos...: | pointless | | school is...: | fucking horrible | | my favorite thing is...: | music | | music...: | favorite thing | | favorite feature in the opposite sex is...: | eyes | | instant messaging is...: | good | | favorite flower is...: | roses? | | pictures are...: | my line of work | | milk is...: | good | | this survey...: | fun | | shoes...: | size 8 1/2 | | favorite season is...: | fall | | re-makes of old movies are...: | good once in a while |
random randomocity of life brought to you by BZOINK!
| Which person comes to mind | | best-friend: | jack or corey | | enemy: | too many people | | love interest: | none | | person you talk to when you're down: | keri, katy, lindsay | | person you try to avoid: | people in general | | person you haven't spoken to in a long time: | matt | | person that makes you made: | made? do you me mean mad? a lot of people | | someone you think is stupid: | kendall....lmao nick | | a celebrity you wish u could meet: | john cusack | | person that cheers u up: | keri, katy, lindsay, coby | | person who hates u: | try people that don't hate me | | teacher that pisses u off: | herta, constantyne | | person that pisses u off the most: | see above | | person u wish u could spend more time with: | a few people |
People brought to you by BZOINK!
| ::15 Random Favorites:: | | 1: | music | | 2: | sunsets | | 3: | movies | | 4: | games | | 5: | girls | | 6: | guitars | | 7: | piano | | 8: | classical music | | 9: | singing | | 10: | screamo | | 11: | emo | | 12: | running | | 13: | photography | | 14: | coffee | | 15: | pictures | | ::14 Favorite Foods:: | | 1: | pizza | | 2: | lasagna | | 3: | philly steak and cheese | | 4: | tacos | | 5: | corned beef and cabbage | | 6: | bacon cheeseburgers | | 7: | pancakes | | 8: | waffles | | 9: | milkshakes | | 10: | cereal | | 11: | steak | | 12: | shrimp | | 13: | baked potato | | 14: | apple pie | | ::13 Most Watched Shows:: | | 1: | MXC | | 2: | mail call | | 3: | history's mysterys | | 4: | modern marvels | | 5: | VH1 countdown | | 6: | drew carey show | | 7: | whose line is it anyway? | | 8: | CSPAN | | 9: | Meet The Press | | 10: | ESPN | | 11: | N/A | | 12: | N/A | | 13: | N/A | | ::12 Good Bands in your Opinion:: | | 1: | Brand New | | 2: | A Static Lullaby | | 3: | Thursday | | 4: | Fall Out Boy | | 5: | Straylight Run | | 6: | Anatomy Of A Ghost | | 7: | Avenged Sevenfold | | 8: | Atreyu | | 9: | Poison The Well | | 10: | Death Cab For Cutie | | 11: | Further Seems Forever | | 12: | From Autumn To Ashes | | ::11 Memories:: | | 1: | Shooting neighbor with paintball gun | | 2: | jack coming back smelling like a drunk after communion | | 3: | two dimes falling out of jack's pants...lmao | | 4: | me and pat ice fishing and getting frostbite | | 5: | me and pat beating halo in one night | | 6: | meeting brand new | | 7: | hanging with john nolan after the tbs concert | | 8: | seeing death cab for cutie | | 9: | running through the graveyard by nick's house at midnight and falling over a tombstone | | 10: | me and ray getting lost on the way back from blockbuster | | 11: | me and matt getting kicked out of the theater for me fighting | | ::10 Close Friends:: | | 1: | jack | | 2: | keri | | 3: | ralph | | 4: | corey | | 5: | lindsay | | 6: | dave | | 7: | katy | | 8: | joel | | 9: | matt | | 10: | nick | | ::09 Things you're looking forward to:: | | 1: | license | | 2: | summer | | 3: | end of school | | 4: | concerts in the summer | | 5: | new laptop | | 6: | new car | | 7: | new chances for likes/loves | | 8: | end of track season | | 9: | fall | | ::08 Things you wear daily:: | | 1: | contacts | | 2: | boxers | | 3: | shoes | | 4: | pants | | 5: | socks | | 6: | hoodie | | 7: | shirt | | 8: | another coat sometimes | | ::07 Things That Annoy You:: | | 1: | people | | 2: | rap | | 3: | neighbors | | 4: | parents | | 5: | brother | | 6: | school | | 7: | teachers | | ::06 Things You Touch Everyday:: | | 1: | guitars | | 2: | piano keys | | 3: | sheet music | | 4: | computer | | 5: | car keys | | 6: | myself? | | ::05 Movies You Could Watch Over and Over:: | | 1: | say anything | | 2: | high-fidelity | | 3: | better off dead | | 4: | its a wonderful life | | 5: | the thin red line | | ::04 Of Your Favorite Childhood Toys:: | | 1: | any sort of weapon | | 2: | pianos | | 3: | cardboard boxes | | 4: | sticks | | ::03 People You Have Kissed:: | | 1: | claire kosanke..... | | 2: | n/a | | 3: | n/a | | ::02 Of Your Favorite Songs:: | | 1: | brand new - jude law and a semester abroad | | 2: | a static lullaby - a song for a broken heart | | ::01 Person You Could Spend the Rest of Your Life With:: | | 1: | n/a...don't have anyone and i'm pretty sure no one wants to spend the rest of their life with me |
Countdown brought to you by BZOINK!
that took a long time
1 breath |
first breath after coma |
::
2004 15 April :: 8.12 pm
| What is your favorite.. | | gum: | something | | restaurant: | too many | | drink: | coffee!! | | season: | fall | | type of weather: | mild and raining or a crisp fall day | | emotion: | the way i usually am? | | thing to do on a half day: | i don't get half days | | late-night activity: | drinking coffee, write music, play instruments | | sport: | paintball | | city: | i have a few | | store: | music stores | | When was the last time you.. | | cried: | 2 weeks... | | played a sport: | today, football with the track team | | laughed: | today, watching MXC with nick | | hugged someone: | keri on tuesday | | kissed someone: | claire...2 months ago... :-( | | felt depressed: | few hours ago, reminiscing... | | felt elated: | not recently | | felt overworked: | today | | faked sick: | thursday....after running ten miles | | lied: | today, telling my mom everything is ok | | What was the last.. | | word you said: | goddammit | | thing you ate: | i'm eating a taco right now | | song you listened to: | billy joel - and so it goes | | thing you drank: | water | | place you went to: | starbucks | | movie you saw: | band of brothers...last night | | movie you rented: | duplex | | concert you attended: | death cab for cutie | | Who was the last person you.. | | hugged: | keri | | cried over: | claire... | | kissed: | claire... | | danced with: | myself? or claire | | shared a secret with: | nick | | had a sleepover with: | nick | | called: | katy called me, does that count? | | went to a movie with: | pat...we saw the passion of the christ way back | | saw: | nick | | were angry with: | my mom | | couldn't take your eyes off of: | no one | | obsessed over: | no one | | Have you ever.. | | danced in the rain: | yes | | kissed someone: | yes | | done drugs: | kinda | | drank alcohol: | yes | | slept around: | nope | | partied 'til the sun came up: | in a way | | had a movie marathon: | yeah, john cusack | | gone too far on a dare: | yea | | spun until you were immensely dizzy: | lol, yea | | taken a survey quite like this before: | i think so |
The Favorites, Have-You-Evers.. and Last Times! Oh, the variety! brought to you by BZOINK!
| Would you rather be an African elephant or an Asian elephant? Why?: | neither | | Would you rather freeze to death or burn alive? Why?: | freeze to death, i like the cold anyway | | Name three movies you like: | say anything, high-fidelity, better off dead | | Name three books you like: | catcher in the rye, the communist manifesto, one flew over the cuckoo's nest | | Have you ever fallen in love with a fictional character? Which one(s)? Why?: | nope | | Republican, Democrat or other? Why?: | kinda a mix between republican and independant | | Attendance percentage at high school dances?: | i get forced to go | | What television shows do you watch regularly?: | mxc, stuff on the history channel | | Abortion is...: | evil | | The death penalty is...: | fine for real sick/bad people | | How do you take your coffee?: | cream and sugar | | How do you take your tea?: | plain | | Who's your favorite teacher/professor?: | either coach julien or coach brosnan | | How do you feel about your parents?: | i don't like them | | What sort of music do you listen to?: | screamo, indie, hardcore, emo, some older stuff | | List five or ten bands you listen to.: | brand new, converge, taking back sunday, thursday, atreyu, fall out boy, a static lullaby, the police, the rocket summer | | Do you use public transportation?: | no | | Ever told someone you love him/her?: | yes | | Morning person, night person or both?: | both | | Siblings?: | 1 brother, sean...age 13 | | What are your friends like?: | fine | | Amusement parks are?: | ok | | Cafeterias are?: | blah | | Dogs are?: | cool | | Any phobias, traumas or other weirdnesses?: | spiders, clowns, hospitals, dying alone, losing someone i care about, shipwrecks. i've been blown up, shot at and stuff like that. i've stiched myself. |
The Personality Resume brought to you by BZOINK!
| Free movies for a year or free CDS for your life?: | free cds for life | | School or work?: | work | | Christmas or birthday?: | christmas | | Peanut Butter M&MS,Regular M&Ms, or Peanut M&MS?: | peanut | | Dozen Roses or 3 boxes of chochlate?: | chocolate | | Sandra Bullock or Julia Roberts?: | julia roberts | | Brad Pitt or Tom Cruise?: | tom cruise | | Vanilla Pepsi or Vanilla coke?: | vanilla coke | | American Eagle or Abercromie and Fitch?: | neither | | Driving or flying?: | either, because i can do both | | Roller skating or ice skating?: | ice skating | | Apples or oranges?: | apples | | Paris, France or Florence, Italy?: | paris | | Punk'D or The Newlyweds?: | no | | Jay Leno or David Letterman?: | leno | | New York or LA?: | new york | | AOL messenger or MSN messenger?: | both | | Jennifer Aniston/Brad Pitt or J.LO/Ben Affleck?: | brad and jen | | Ralph Lauren or Tommy Hilfiger?: | neither | | leaf raking or snow shoveling?: | leaf raking by far | | black pen or blue pen?: | black | | WalMart or Target?: | target | | picnic under the stars or horse carriage in the park?: | picnic under stars | | chochlate chip cookies or peanut butter cookies?: | chocolate chip cookies | | Kobe Bryant or Shaq?: | shaq | | basketball, baseball, or football?: | football | | Hiliary Duff (Lizzie Mcguire) Or Lindsey Logan(Freaky Friday)?: | lindsey logan | | French fries,curly fries, or tator tots?: | french fries | | Ben Affleck or Matt Damon?: | matt damon | | Phoebe, Monica, or Rachel(off of FRIENDS)?: | rachel |
Chose between... brought to you by BZOINK!
i got really really bored.
first breath after coma |
::
2004 14 April :: 11.55 am
Resounding
If I could take one thing back I would write
The perfect song for you
You would have never left
And if the chords progress
The way I mapped them out
They will wipe your tears away
And all your doubts
Cause it's always been for you
Every mountain scaled for you
And every single day I'm falling down
I never want to say you're mine right now
A tear rolls down your cheek
And hits the ground
I'm falling down (Lets go)
You sit alone inside your room and rust
You give your trust to those who don't deserve your trust
You put yourself through hell
As you sweat pound for pound
But as the drama fades
Tell me what will resound
Its always been for you
I sing every song for you
And every single day I'm falling down
I never want to say you're mine right now
A tear rolls down your cheek
And hits the ground
I'm falling down....
I'm falling down
Could you stay forever and a day
Together come what may
If only I could say what I'm thinking baby
And every single day I'm falling down
I never want to say you're mine right now
A tear rolls down your cheek
And hits the ground
I'm falling down
And every single day I'm falling down
I never want to say you're mine right now
If only I could finally face the truth
I have always loved you
loved you...
Loved you
first breath after coma |
::
2004 14 April :: 9.53 am
Color Blind
Here comes the sadness that I miss so much
That lonely aching comes from every touch
I’ve grown accustomed to the grays and blacks
Because they’re always coming back
Sit down for supper, won’t you dine with me
Or can’t you handle seeing all I see
I’ve grown to colorblind to cease my bitching
And I’ve grown to love the pain
And I move too slow and I think too fast and the first rainbow I see will be the last.
Here comes a view I’ve seen a million times
Here comes a boring song with thoughtless rhymes
I know you’re sick of me so tell me here
Because you could have be the one
To make it all disappear.
first breath after coma |
::
2004 13 April :: 6.53 pm
:: Mood: ass muscles hurt
:: Music: belle and sebastian - take me away from here, i'm dying
ok, today i went to keri's house for a bit before track practice. good times, lol.
ran 5 miles today for track, i should have worn pants. had to bench press, 110 lbs, ten times. i didn't like that. then a bunch of things with 15 lbs weights. so i'm very tired and my ass muscles hurt, i'm like owww. so yeah, track again til friday. friday, haircut, eye appointment and who knows, maybe jack's house.
first breath after coma |
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