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2004 29 March :: 6.43 pm
:: Mood: sick
into the night
If I was a fly
And I had a day left ‘til I died
I would lay down til tomorrow
You’re clipping my wings
I try to win you back with all my words that you know mean nothing
You could have believed in me
And I saw a tear on a rose and I swept it off for you
As I gag on my guts ‘cause I’m watching you give up
I’m a tear in the clock as you walk away
I can almost taste the glaze on your lips
Smacking away into the night
They say at least he’s my friend
And he’ll treat you kindly in the end
Call me bitter but I’m brimming with hate for both of you
A film if playing in my head of you fornicating in his bed
The satin sheets are ruby red like your nails that scarred my back
And I saw a tear on a rose so I clipped it off for you
I’m a fly on a wall and I’m watching you give up
I’m a tear in the clock as you walk away
I can almost see a shade of your green eyes
Fading away into the night
You never believed in me
But I will believe in me
Because now I take a match to the rose that I gave, my love, to you
Won’t forgive
Won’t forget
And the rage will lift me up
I hope you choke on his tongue
As I walk away I will not watch his hands as they deftly pull you away
Into the night
i feel like shit. someone kill me quick.
1 breath |
first breath after coma |
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2004 28 March :: 1.49 pm
You are an Elementalist. Your magic stems from the
forces of nature. You might be a forest
nuturing Druid, a storm-creating Weather-Wizard
or any of the many Elementals, but one thing is
sure-- your bond with nature is strong. You can
rely heavily on nature to support yourself
aesthetically or physically for it lends you
both comfort and strength. Your instincts
rarely fail you. You are vibrantly passionate
but are sometimes carried away by your own
emotions.
Which Magical Order Are You In?
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You're suffering from what I call, Deep Depression.
No matter what your outward appearances, you
seem to be always deepressed. Nothing ever
seems right. You can't remeber a time of
happiness. You think lifes not worth it and at
least thought of suicide...possibly tried it.
You don't like to be left alone, cause the mind
wonders to things you don't want to remember.
Any of your close friends try to cheer you
up...and outwardly they do, but this type of
depression really deep...most things can't
reach. You tend to think yourself worthless and
unloved...and that hurts deeply, specially when
you care about a few people. You have problems
making yourself do anything. You seem to always
be tired and have troubles sleeping. You hate
life and can't wait for the release from it. It
seems to be endless suffering. You belive that
noone truly understands you...you don't talk
about it much cause noone understands and
you're sick of hearing,
What kind of depression are you?
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hand holding - you like to be in constant physical
contact with your special someone but you don't
want to take things too quickly.
What Sign of Affection Are You?
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My inner child is sixteen years old!
Life's not fair! It's never been fair, but while
adults might just accept that, I know
something's gotta change. And it's gonna
change, just as soon as I become an adult and
get some power of my own.
How Old is Your Inner Child?
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first breath after coma |
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2004 26 March :: 8.47 am
You are a true gentlemen. You are always nice to
others and always try to make things better
then they really are. You attract many lifetime
friends and should already be taken by a girl.
What Kind Of Person Are You?
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rotfl!!!!
At the time you are depressive and stuck somewhere.
In the middle of nowhere, looking for an exit but
it seems so far away or you may cant see it.
Everyone comes in that part of his/her life onetime
but what are you going to do about it?
May you start feeling comfortable where you are.
Something had happened in your life you cant let go
and you think you havent earned it at all
But it happened so get your butt outta there!
Youre smart so dont let this happen anymore to you
. When you feel like it stand up again
~Is your life a lie?-9 Results+Beautiful Pictures~
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Kurt COBAIN (1967-1994)
You are like Kurt Cobain, the famous singer and
songwriter from Nirvana.
Your motto is: Its better to burn out than to fade
away.
You are extremely sensitive person, but dont want
to show it in the outside world.
May you even didnt realize it in the beginning.
There has been a problem in your family and you
dont get over it. Its lying like a shadow
behind you and you cant see it, because you
dont want to turn around. This depression runs
after you but you are so long inside that you
think you wont come out. You never thought
about being popular but you get it because you
are very talented .You are a genie, and can
reach into the hearts of the people, but there
is still this depression. Then you get these
stomach problems and take drugs. They make your
feelings even more extrem. After some time this
satisfaction you felt for your music
disappears. Your erratic mood hasnt got the
passion anymore . Then youll kill yourself with
a gun, but youll still live in people minds and
will forever.
~Which famous suicide would you be?+8 different,long results and pics!!~
brought to you by Quizilla
first breath after coma |
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2004 24 March :: 9.36 pm
Ex Marks The Spot
love is just another word for pain
it's a broken record repeating the same thing
when you want it it's not there
when you have it you don't care
when i lose it in the end...
the heartbreak, the heartache is more than i wanted
we gave up, we made up
it's not like you cared
deception, depression is all that i've got
am i losing what's there
and i've made up my mind
i'd be better off alone
love is just a waste of time
and all the lonely nights
and all the crushing scenes
and all the pointless fights
someone tell me what it means
someone tell me why hearts break
'cuz sometimes i think this thing called love is another word for pain
and i'm giving up on happy endings
the one's that are only in movies
where the guy gets the girl and everybody's happy
i think that's the way it should be
the heartbreak, the heartache is more than i wanted
we gave up, we made up
it's not like you cared
deception, depression is all that i've got
am i losing what's there
and i've made up my mind
i'd be better off alone
love is just a waste of time
and all the lonely nights
and all the crushing scenes
and all the pointless fights
someone tell me what it means
someone tell me why hearts break
'cuz sometimes i think this thing called love is another word for pain
is another word for pain
is another word for pain
nah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah...
first breath after coma |
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2004 24 March :: 9.35 pm
Guernica
Ever since I was young your word is the word that always won.
Worry and wake the ones you love.
A phone call I'd rather not receive.
Please use my body while I sleep.
My lungs are fresh and yours to keep,
Kept clean and they will let you breathe.
Is this the way a toy feels when its batteries run dry?
I am the watch you always wear but you forget to wind.
Nobody plans to be half a world away at times like these,
so I sat alone and waited out the night.
The best part of what has happened was the part I must have missed.
So I'm asking you to shine it on and stick around.
I'm not writing my goodbyes.
I submit no excuse.
If this is what I have to do I owe you every day I wake.
If I could I would shrink myself and sink through your skin to your blood cells
and remove whatever makes you hurt but I am too weak to be your cure.
Is this the way a toy feels when its batteries run dry?
I am the watch you always wear but you forget to wind.
Nobody plans to be half a world away at times like these,
so I sat alone and waited out the night.
The best part of what has happened was the part I must have missed.
So I'm asking you to shine it on and stick around.
I'm not writing my goodbyes.
I'm not letting you check out.
You will beat this starting now and you will always be around.
I'm there to monitor your breathing
I will watch you while you're sleeping.
I will keep you safe and sound.
Does anybody remember back when you were very young.
Did you ever think that you would be this blessed?
1 breath |
first breath after coma |
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2004 24 March :: 7.33 pm
The Greatest Fall Of All Time
The hand of my clock strikes two
In times when I got the best of you
We made promises we couldn't keep
And every night we couldn't sleep.
I didn't know why, but didn't ask questions
because it was the first time in my life, yeah the first time in my life
Where I, did something right.
I set myself up for the greatest fall of all time
You pick me apart
While I search for witty things to say (In my defense)
"You'll never amount to anything anyway"
(Don't press your luck, don't press your luck)
And think that I'm impressed with your one night stands
and your contagious kiss
I'm trying to get this right
Yeah, cause I'm ridiculous like that
I'll keep this as
A constant reminder
Of the nights I spent holding onto her
And rest assured I'm moving on
I miss you less, with each day your gone (your gone)
first breath after coma |
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