We'll do it all
Everything
On our own

We don't need
Anything
Or anyone

If I lay here
If I just lay here
Would you lie with me and just forget the world?

I don't quite know
How to say
How I feel

Those three words
Are said too much
They're not enough

If I lay here
If I just lay here
Would you lie with me and just forget the world?

Forget what we're told
Before we get too old
Show me a garden that's bursting into life

Let's waste time
Chasing cars
Around our heads

I need your grace
To remind me
To find my own

If I lay here
If I just lay here
Would you lie with me and just forget the world?

Forget what we're told
Before we get too old
Show me a garden that's bursting into life

All that I am
All that I ever was
Is here in your perfect eyes, they're all I can see

I don't know where
Confused about how as well
Just know that these things will never change for us at all

If I lay here
If I just lay here
Would you lie with me and just forget the world?

This song has been playing every time I turn on the radio. It's sending me into a winding path of the past.
It's confusing.
It's not unwelcome.

Update lulz.
work and work. And, soon enough, school as well.
I'm excited to start my psych degree. Not so much on finishing my business one.

Coke is a hard addiction to kick.

Cherry that is... My drug.

....Anyways.
Yeah. I have too much time on my hands usually. Yet I can still never find the time to hang up my clothes.
Funny how those things work.

Totally moved out of the house with Ashley and Lacey. Lacey met a guy from North Dakota and he moved down a few weeks ago. At that time I moved into a house with Renkoski. It's pretty boss, not gonna lie.

I got a raise at work... a wopping $0.40, but still. I also put in for a management postion. I don't know if I'll get it, of course I have my hopes up, but not too high. That would be another pay raise, but idk. At least they'll know I'm interested in a management position for future knowledge, should I not get this one.

Um... yeah. I'm doing super, old-injury wise. No more surgeries, I think. Well, I might have to get an anthroscopy on my knee, but like... that's further off in the future, I think.
It sucks balls when the weather changes, and it's hard to sleep, but I just knock myself out with benadryl on those nights.

Hmm. Yeah. I'm single, of course. Don't think that's going to change any time soon. Like, seriously, I limp and I have scars. Big, obvious ones. Guys my age are too caught up on shit like that to look past it and get to know me.
So I'll get over the loneliness and not worry about it for the next like friggin five years, I guess.
/shrug.

I'm thinking of tattoos, still. It's so hard. I know where I want it, I just need to know what "it" is. I'm torn between a penguin and some script.
I know not what I want.

Me oh my it has been awhile, hmm?

I'm single. I'm back to working. Some days I do great, others I want to cry my eyes out from pain.
Some days I walk awesomely, others I limp around like my grandmother. I hate walking from the back to the front of the store, and back again. When people see me limping, I always think that they think I'm mocking someone, so I feel bad. Therefore I work really hard on not limping. Sometimes it's rather impossible.

I signed up for classes again.
I decided to get another degree, besides my business one, in psychology. I think I want to teach. But I think I want to like... do businessishy things.
The decisions kill me!

I had a recent surgery on my knee, marking the fifth. A wire had broken and was doing bad things to my tendons, but like... they took it out. And it's still doing the same thing that we had the surgery to fix.
So my surgeon/doctor gave me a shot of cortisone in my knee [which hurt far too bad to want that to make things better, for I want no more. ever.]
We're giving that a month to work. If not, we're going to see what else we can take out and rearrange. Joyous.

Ashley and Lacey ran away to South Dakota. Lacey met this guy off of Speeddate on Facebook. They hit it off rather well, I guess. They had known each other for a week, maybe two, and he came down. Now it's her turn to go up. He put his two weeks in last friday, and then he's moving down as soon as he gets things together. I guess he's probably moving in here, though our house is far too little for four people.
If he gets a job around here, he'll stay. If not, he and Lacey are moving away.
If he stays, I'm moving out with Jacob. If he and she move, Jacob is moving in here. I'm pretty excited, either way.

I found out today I get a forty cent raise, starting August fifth =]
That's exciting; I was happy.
I got "far exceeds expectations" on my evaluation papers. Because I'm awesome like that.

Hmm. Dusty and I dated for like... less than a month. That just... was weird. It was all new and exciting at first, but then I was like, "Dusty... meh." He was very much my friend, as opposed to my boyfriend. It hit awkward land really fast.
So... been single since April 30th. (Yes. We broke up the day after my birthday. It was sad.)
I have definitely hit the tired-of-being-alone status.
/shrug.

I'm brave, but I'm chickenshit.
Tuesday.
10:45.

Mt. Dew + Pepsi = Delicious.
So I fucked up my left arm. No idea how, but it hurts super bad and I have an appointment with my surgeon wednesday at 2:45. I have to keep my arm in a sling and not use it "at all." Really not looking forward to that. I might have to have surgery on it again... fail.
Fuck my life.

The way things are now kind of just confuses me even more.
He says he does, but doesn't always act like it.
I hope I confuse him just as much... just so we're even. heh

Tonight was nice
However...


I'm scared of it bringing back feelings I've worked so hard to subdue.
I already feel them surfacing.
/sigh