the real me
what many people dont realize is that i am NOT happy all the time.today i cryed....hard.then i looked at myself in the mirror.my mascara was running and i looked like a train wreck.the way i looked is the way i felt inside.my heart sinks when i feel this way.what makes it worse is i have no shoulder to cry on.no one is here to listen to me and tell me its going to be alright. my mother she hurts me. she says she loves me and i believe her but somthing is missing. i think her and my older sister have a bond that i will never have because i am not givin the chance.this wounds me deeply. for i have so much love to give but it seems like no one wants it. then if i do tell people how i realy feel they say i cant be sad because im jackie...a bouncing ball of joy and that i am incapeable of being sad. well i have news for all you people who believe that.....a am a person. and i function like a normal person. oh yes that means i have many feelings anger,love,sadness,joy, you name it.but people expect me to have no problems. so i slap on a happy face and swallow my feelings. i am a ticking time bomb set to go off when the pressure is to much. i wish people would take me seriously.

wish upon a falling star