Classes, health, everything is quite overwhelming at the moment.
I had my scope last Friday. I was going to update something about it, but I was still too high from the stuff they gave me and then I took a four hour long nap.
She told me that I don't have an ulcer, and they took some biopsies of my stomach lining/bacteria to test for super acidity. She said that I might need a CAT scan. My follow up appointment is a week from Monday.
Classes. French. Je ne comp pas. J'aime la francais, mais je deteste l'examens. I have a 79% in the class right now. I keep on failing all of the quizzes because we take them after five minutes of review. I think I'm doing better than a lot of people in the class, though.
Chemistry. I would drop it if I could.
Contemporary Literary Thought. I've only written one paper, which was two weeks ago, and I haven't gotten it back yet. There is a TON of theory and philosophy. I feel like I need a philosophy minor to know what's going on. I like my New Criticism, and it's definitely NOT that.
Math. It's just a lot of work.
I can't wait until next semester when I'm taking two English classes and a political science class along with my next installment of French. I think this semester is going to be my rut semester and I'll be happy if I pull all B's.
I think I'm taking History of Literary Criticism this summer and that excites me.
my prozac has taken the day (maybe week) off. I am in the worst mood ever and i would seirously suggest not talking to me today because I am bound to explode.
when someone tells you they are comig over at 1 and decide not to come to oh who knows... THREE or something? maybe you should let the home owner know. that'd be great thanks.
dont you ever EVER EVER EVER ever come up to me while talking on your cell phone and fucking show me by using your fingers what tanning bed you'd like to tan in. or by pointing or mouthing words or fucking any of that stuff. seriously i'm going to punch this business dressed man who thinks he's fucking better than me i want to kick him in the fucking crotch. god i hope he dies.
::
2008 26 September :: 1.48am
:: Mood: tired?
:: Music: mr. deeds soundtrack
^^^no idea why^^^
so yeah. i had class all night. also turned in my app at papa john's. and i locked my keys in the car. dad came and bailed me out, though.
we did an audio interview with a guy in tampa tonight. how many thousand miles away? with 20 to 15000 Hz bandwidth, talkback, and almost no delay. phenomenal.
then i got back and chuck and i watched mystery science theater 3000 - "Hamlet" (the "from the 1960s, german, and dubbed in english" version).
that at least made it a little more worthwhile.
only had one cigarette today. thought that was pretty good.
I filled out my app for degree yesterday and Pichot turned it in to the office today. I'm graduating in May. This is the weirdest, scariest feeling I've felt since those four months in France. And I feel bad eating Tums like candy here.
Classes are going okay. Ceramics class sucks because on a scale from one to a lot, I have negative five art skills. And there are art students in class even though the title specifically says FOR NON-MAJORS. GET OUT OF MY CLASS, ART KIDS, YOU'RE MAKING MY BAD ART LOOK WORSE.
So, I finally went and saw a specialist (gastrointerologist). I couldn't play last week in band because I was so nauseated and I finally got fed up with everything, so I went and saw a regular doctor at university health services and they referred me to a specialist in town.
I went on Monday and saw her: I'm having an GI ultra sound today at three thirty to rule out any possibilities of enlarged things (like my gull bladder) and I'm having a scope a week from Friday. The scope is where they shove a camera down my throat to look at my stomach and esophagus; I will be asleep when they do it.
For now I'm on Protonix in the morning to help to try to heal any errosion I've had, and Zantac at night to reduce the acid in my stomach.
The specialist said it's probably not an ulcer, but that the medication I was on (over the past year) probably relaxed the sphincter between my esophagus and my stomach allowing acid to come up in my throat. She said there's a strong likelihood that I will have acid reflux disease for the rest of my life if the sphincter doesn't heal.
I can't eat:
gum
tomato based foods
spicy foods
large meals
food high in fat
fried food
alcohol
coffee
caffeine
carbonated beverages
So, there it is. I'll get poked and prodded a bit more in the next few weeks: my follow up appointment is on October third.
I'm throwing myself into a busy week again; classes, work, the fraternity.
I made first chair in University Band for the first time in a year and I get many solos, one of which is a montage of Raisins and Almonds-a song which I played many a time in my youth practicing.
My health is improving. My aciphex trial is almost done, and I'm better, but not totally healed. Going to Wheatland screwed me up a bit: it's always two steps forward, one step back. I think once I'm done I'm going to go on Prilosec for a while to help it heal all the way.
Wheatland pictures to be on facebook soon (whenever Jessie gets them up).
::
2008 5 September :: 1.16am
:: Mood: pensive
:: Music: the alan parsons project - tales of mystery and imagination
i think it's pretty sad that three-beer chris feels more "normal" than no-beer chris.
i guess the solution is to not have beer for awhile. but still. i haven't been functioning up to par without it. and, frankly, i haven't been getting drunk all the time, or passing out. just one or two after dinner or whatever. and it isn't until that point that i feel awake and alert and - well - normal.
i don't know what to make of it. but, either way, i figure it's bad.
P.S.
this made me smile, though:
"hey chris!
we were talking about how great you've been at the station during the meeting today. and we would really love to re-write another executive board position into the constitution. the new position would be the position of technical director. details are still a little vague, but basically the person in this position would be the go-to guy for all questions/problems with the equipment and website. we all feel that you would do wonderfully in this position and we would love for you to accept.
is this something that you are interested in?
thanks so much!
jill"
and i thought they hated me... : )
i sent her my more reserved-sounding equivalent of "fuck yeah!" as soon as i got it. although, now that i think about it, fuck yeah might have been the way to go. oh well, either way, it's cool, and i'm happy.