Speak Now.

:: 2005 16 January :: 10.47am
:: Music: Dresden Dolls - Missed me

Half hoping.
I'm better now.

You have this unpleasant chip on your shoulder, which is very unattractive.

:: 2005 14 January :: 3.40pm

"There will always be ten more people better than me."
"And there will always be ten more people better than them."

:: 2005 12 January :: 8.04pm
:: Music: Bright Eyes - The Invisible Gardener

I hate when I am falling apart and there is no one to keep me together.

I don't care if you call me emo. I don't care if you think I whine. I don't care if you think I am depressed. I just don't care.
I am so used to all of this. I don't want to be.

:: 2005 10 January :: 8.50pm
:: Music: Johnny Cash - The First Time Ever I Saw Your Face

I'm not strong enough..

:: 2005 9 January :: 9.09pm
:: Music: The Cure - Lost

I can't find myself, I got lost..in someone else.
If I felt any stronger I feel like I'd just die.

Words do no justice. I can't even explain it, so I won't try.

I need you. So fucking badly.

:: 2005 9 January :: 12.37am

Some lyrics I relate with greatly.
Again I Go Unnoticed
Read more..

:: 2005 9 January :: 12.00am
:: Music: The Used - Cut Up Angels

I want to give you whatever you need. What is it you need? Is it within me?
I wish I could make things better. Instead I just sit there and watch everything get worse. I don't help, even if I know I could. I don't say anything. Even though I know it would fix things.

I don't know what's wrong with me.

If I'm so scared, none of this makes sense.

:: 2005 6 January :: 4.52pm
:: Music: Bright Eyes - Don't Know When But A Day Is Gonna Come

*sigh
Part of a song..
...so that is how I learned the lesson that everyone is alone.
And your eyes must do some raining if you are ever going to grow.
But, when crying don't help and you can't compose yourself it is best to compose a poem. An honest verse of longing or simple song of hope.
That is why I'm singing, baby don't worry. 'Cause now I got your back.
And every time you feel like crying, I'm gonna try and make you laugh.
And if I can't, if it just hurts too bad, then we will wait for it to pass. And I will keep you company through those days so long and black.
And we'll keep working on the problem, we know we'll never solve,
of love's uneven remainders. Our lives are fractions of a whole.
But, if the world could remain within a frame like a painting on a wall.
Then I think we would see the beauty. Then we would stand staring in awe, at our still lives posed, like a bowl of oranges. Like a story told by the fault lines and the soil.
Bright Eyes - Bowl Of Oranges

6 Thoughts | Thoughts?

:: 2005 6 January :: 3.57pm

God.. I hate being so incredibly negative.

:: 2004 29 December :: 2.28am

Tears..
Like I've been waiting for, for so long.

:: 2004 28 December :: 10.53pm

I wish I could just understand.

:: 2004 26 December :: 8.43pm
:: Music: Brand New - The No Seatbelt Song

And..
I love how you don't care.

:: 2004 26 December :: 6.11pm
:: Music: Bright Eyes - Sunrise, Sunset

I need you.

I'm not kidding.

:: 2004 21 December :: 9.11am
:: Music: Rilo Kiley - Portions for Foxes

Just one more kiss.
The hardest part of my day is letting you leave.

:: 2004 18 December :: 9.22am
:: Music: Bright Eyes - Well Whiskey

It's like we're all far too immature to handle something so fucking stupid. It's slowing driving me insane. So much tension, guilt.. bleh.

You used to push back the darkness like a floodlight, but tonight that is a secret like the soul of a whore, that if you want to have fun you will just have to ignore. Now let my troubles solve themselves. I used to get involved, but I'm just no help, but tonight let's pretend that we are just like we were. Bright Eyes - Well Whiskey

:: 2004 15 December :: 11.28pm

tears streaming down my face.
I love you.

:: 2004 14 December :: 6.35am
:: Music: The Good Life - Night and Day

*sigh
What a shitty way to start out my morning.

:: 2004 12 December :: 11.08am

Kashmir - Make it Grand lyrics
Read more..

:: 2004 11 December :: 3.16pm

"I'm ready to die for you."

Then die.

:: 2004 8 December :: 5.45pm
:: Music: The Good Life - Inmates

I can't be your prisoner.
I just want it over.

That's all.

Leave me alone. Please.

:: 2004 7 December :: 3.43pm
:: Music: Straylight Run - Mistakes We Knew We Were Making

One day I can leave this.

And it will all be over.

:: 2004 5 December :: 8.14pm
:: Mood: disappointed

Nobody knows how to take a hint.

:: 2004 5 December :: 2.55pm

Read.
The Good Life - Album of the Year lyrics

Read more..

:: 2004 3 December :: 6.19pm

Hmm..
I'm sick of being cold.

:: 2004 2 December :: 9.51pm

The more I think about it the more unreal it seems.

Wake me up.

:: 2004 1 December :: 8.40pm

You make me have to catch my breath.

And that's how I know.

:: 2004 29 November :: 7.16pm
:: Music: Rilo Kiley - I never

Does he love you?
I was reading over my old entires from my other journal.. I thought this was interesting.

I have a feeling that if I jumped off a bridge, they would not only jump farther and with more grace than I did, but when I died from the fall, they would live.

Sometimes I still feel like that.

:: 2004 26 November :: 4.33pm

Ugh.
You don't understand why I'm mad at you all the time when you're online.

But, I do.

:: 2004 25 November :: 9.13am
:: Music: Le Tigre - Eau D'Bedroom

This could be perfect.

:: 2004 20 November :: 8.16am
:: Music: Death Cab for Cutie - Title and Registration

I couldn't sleep..
It's just tough love, sweetie.