Sorrow rebuild me as I step out of the light
Misery strengthen me as I say my goodbyes
I heal my wounds with grief
And dream of you
And weep myself alive
Sleepwalking Past Hope
I hid the keys to unlock love's heart
To hold you in my sweetest pain and suffering
Everything's unfair in our lust and war Redemption beyond right and wrong
In our hearts love keeps sweet-talking to despair
And goes on sleepwalking past hope
All is lost in this war
And all we can do is to wail and weep to the saddest song
Sleepwalking past hope
I unlit the light to embrace the dark
To be near but not to turn into you my darling
Forever we're lost in our souls' storm
Reflections of each other's faults
I gave up long ago
Painting love with crimson flow
Ran out of blood and hope
So I paint you no more
My hell begins from the 10th and descends to the circle
Six hundred threescore and six
And from there I crawl beneath Lucifer's claws just for one last kiss
I'm calling on you guys for some help here. I know money is tight and everything but my boss really needs some help, she doesn't have insurance.
the past week or two she's had this bump on her finger and its gotten worse and worse and now she can't move her finger, she took her son to the doctor today for something and the nurse said she should go to the emergency room because its infected and if she doesn't get it taken care of the infection could spread into her whole hand. She didn't have insurance so its going to cost a boatload of money for her to get something done.
she finally went to the ER tonight after alot of persuasion from Heidi and i, while we we're persuading her i told her that i would try to raise some money to help pay for the bill.
She is one of the nicest people i know and is always helping anyone that needs help, so if i have ever brought free pizza to a party you we're at or you shared some pizza with me that i got for free, i ask that you please donate some money for this. I'm going to put in $50 of my own money.
let me know if your interested, i'd appericate it alot
I've decided I can't do art anymore.
Not...straight art anyway. Like..drawing and painting and such. I can't help but feel creative in most things. But as for just plain drawing, I don't think I can do it anymore.
And I've also decided that I'm going to give up on almost everything. Except for pure friendship. And see where I will end up.
HIM
Well, as Addison has given the analytical view, I will give the fun, fan view. =P
Well, I made it, there were quite a few times where I didn't think I'd be able to. about 30 hours without sleep, plus about a gazillion cigarette's worth of smoke making me sick to my stomach. I made it through the whole show okay. =]
The lights went dark, and Linde starts playing. for about 30 seconds....
Then finally, the lights come on, and Gas, Mige, and Burton join in. And finally (honestly, I don't even know where he came from, he was just suddenly there =/ ) Ville comes out, and even better, with a giant smile on his face, like there was no where else he'd rather be right then. Thats a great impression to give, I think. It was contagious in any case. =]
And so they opened with "Passion's Killing Floor" and continued on through many of my favorites.
I was very impressed. I always knew they were fantastic live, from watching other live videos and hearing other people's recounts from shows they had been to. But when you're actually there yourself, it is so much different.
I literally had to force myself to stay awake, having gone nearly 30 hours without sleep, but I just couldn't miss it. At one point, I had to leave our spot up front, and at least make a pit stop to the bathroom, watching the rest of the show from the back, but it was all good. It was a small theatre, and you could still see them quite well from the back, and plus, you could really see all the guys at once, without having to try and peer over people's heads.
After the show, Erica comes up to me and says, "Eddy! Eddy, come here! Is that Bam!?!" Haha, sadly, it wasn't, he was a very good look-alike (intentional) and people were calling him 'Bam' but it wasn't. And plus he sounded nothing like him. I wish I had gotten a picture of him though. When Erica pointed him out to me, he looked at us, and it would have been a bit awkward for me to pull out my camera and take a picture I think.
Before the show, Mige came out, and was signing autographs, and taking pictures and what not. I was on the phone, and I'm a bit shy =/ so I kinda...didn't run up to him or anything (even though he was 5 feet away) and just continued in the line. I kind of felt bad, like I was ignoring him or something, lol. After the show we went and were waiting a little bit by the bus. When Mige was the first one out, and he had a small group gathering around him. Then he walked by us, and I was too damned shy to ask for a picture again. v_v There were some dumbasses there who kept, almost literally plastering themselves against the bus' door, and even one girl who opened the door and went to go inside. (she didn't realize there were already security people and whatnot in there) And even one girl who....was quite....disgustingly freaky. She had one of those liberty spikes-shaved head things going on, with fishnet panty hose, shiny red leather skirt, and even better...a fish net shirt. Completely fishnet shirt. She was wearing stickers if you know what I mean.
The security guard was getting super pissed at people, which I don't blame him. I think I would have too. XD At one point, the semi was backing up to the trailer of all their equipment, and was about 10 feet away from the trailer when a couple more dumbasses decided that that was enough room to run between a moving semi and the trailer it was trying to back up to.
At one point, a car drives by, and a guy sticks his head out the window, and asks what band had played that night. I say "HIM" and show him the flier I had in my hand. And he says "Ahhh, Bam Margera's Band" I'm like "Yeah.........................." Fuckin' tard. I like Bam, I do. But I hate when people think Bam brought HIM in to existence. True, many in America didn't know about HIM before Bam advertised them. But claiming that HIM is Bam's band....come on. Be a little more ignorant.
Anyway, after a bit of excitement of that sort, I started to feel even more nauseous, and decided I couldn't wait for Ville or the others to come out. And we started to head back to the car. I walked about 10 steps and seriously felt like throwing up, so I kneeled down on the ground, ready to do so. =/ That's when Linde came out and got on the bus. (no point to the story but I thought Id share that part =] ) So after about 4 or 5 mins of sitting on the ground, I felt alright to get back up and head to the car again. I didn't actually throw up, which I was glad for. A little ways on we heard the screams that meant that Ville had finally come out, and watched as the door of the bus became a giant mob of screaming girls. Honestly, with all he has, sometimes I really feel sorry for that man. (I know what some of you are thinking at this point, and fyi, no, I would not ><) So, I finally got to the car and we headed to Jessa's, (Thank you sooooooooooo much for letting us stay!!) Where I fell asleep within half an hour of walking in the door, and when Jessa decided she wanted to take pictures of me sleeping, apparently and persuaded Addison to do the same ><
When we got up, we specifically searched around Chicago for a Long John Silvers. =] It was fun! And we did eventually find it, so it was even better. At which point we decided it was time to go home. And so we did. Got home about 7:30 last night, where I slept, had to get up at 10 to go to work, got home this morning and slept til about 3. Which brings me to this point now. =]
scooby doo, i love the hell out of this show.
i just heard scooby and shaggy laugh and was like "oh my god, thats exactly how i sound when i'm high"
its such a good show, its a classic you know?
but my rant here isn't about how good the old scooby doos are, its about how bad the new ones are :(
in the new ones fred is an idiot, its like holy shit fred what the fuck was that? he's not even trying to score with daphne anymore. just kinda fucked up to me.
i don't know what to write about, my mind is kinda blank.
i don't really care about much anymore, to me life is boring and i need something to keep me going, i don't know what that something is yet, but i think i'll find it soon.
time for some things to change.
i'm tired of drinking and partying all the time.
i'm tired of going nowhere in life.
i'm tired of the same shit every day.
so my step grandmother just died, my great grandmother is in the hospital with fluid around her heart.
its supposed to rain all week.
great week huh?
was at the hospital to see my great grandmother today, she wasn't very coherant, i couldn't stand to look at her, it made me sad.
on the way home, we got a call from my dad saying that my grandpa's wife just passed away.
we just built a ramp for her wheelchair yesterday... irony huh?
so i sit here now, drinking the rest of my vodka, alone.
i think my step grandma died from the rain.... its depressing.
