:: 2004 12 March :: 7.57 pm

My Immortal lyrics
I'm so tired of being here,
suppressed by all my childish fears.
And if you have to leave
I wish that you would just leave,
'cause your presence still lingers here
and it won't leave me alone.

These wounds won't seem to heal.
This pain is just too real.
There's just too much that time cannot erase.

When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears,
when you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears,
and I've held your hand through all of these years,
but you still have all of me.

You used to captivate me
by your resonating light.
Now I'm bound by the life you left behind.
Your face it haunts my once pleasant dreams.
Your voice, it chased away all the sanity in me.

These wounds won't seem to heal.
This pain is just too real.
There's just too much that time cannot erase.

When you cried, I'd wipe away all of your tears,
when you'd scream, i'd fight away all of your fears,
and i've held your hand through all of these years,
but you still have all of me.

I've tried so hard to tell myself that you're gone.
But though you're still with me
I've been alone all along.

When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears,
when you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears,
and i've held your hand through all of these years,
but you still have all of me.

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:: 2004 12 March :: 4.15 pm
:: Mood: so happy it's the weekend!
:: Music: COLDPLAY even though there depressing

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:: 2004 8 March :: 2.09 pm

wow. yesterday i was really hyper. today im not.

let us call the girl in the following, oh, um, i dont know, Kendall. after all, i cant just put up her REAL name. that would be so mean!

KENDALL TOLD, LIKE, EVERYONE THAT I WAS SITTING IN A CHAIR NEXT TO THE PRONCIPALS OFFICE (TRUE) CRYING! (NOT TRUE!)

that girl is wack, man.
i bet she swalllows
one day shes gonna get AIDS.
and i will say
"haha!! whos crying now?"

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:: 2004 7 March :: 4.09 pm

Amy N's turning Ghetto Fabalous!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


guess what??????
i might be switching bedrooms..long story. call me. i will explain any mysteries that may arise in your mind. that includes why i think amy n is ghetto fabalous!

(HINT: i dont hink she is. i just like typing the words ghetto fabalous!!!!!!)

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:: 2004 5 March :: 4.35 pm
:: Mood: happy and mad

Long story short, i almost went to the vice principal's office today. and it was not fun. i was so friggen nervous i was flipping out. good thing tammy told the truth, b/c i DIDNT DO A THING!!!!! so yup im off the hook but im still mad at ms. Bush for sending me there. I DIDNT DO A THING! that vice principal, man, she can be s-c-a-r-y. but now i just feel sorry for calolin( wow i never thought i'd say that!) and Tammy. poor Tammy. shes gonna get in trouble. YEY IM SO HAPPI MRS GOMEZ WASNT HERE TODAY i would have gotten smothered by her rolls of fat as she would be yelling at me.

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:: 2004 4 March :: 5.27 pm

LOAF!
there once was a boy who was new in school. he went up to his teacher, Mr. Dumass, and said "hi! im Johnny! im new!"
"thats nice" said the teacher.
"want to learn a little about me, Johnny?"
"yup!"
" i have a urinary tract infection! and sometimes, when im lonly at night, i put on lipstick and pretend i am a woman. i also like to hear the word LOAF! just say that word, and i will die of laughter. LOAF! HAHAHAHAHA.....I dont have any children or a wife. i am a dragqueen! i like dogs. i have 4 sisters. there names are Valentina, Giavanna, Anntonetta, and George. She is gay too! i think i might have Herpies! i am 47. so, tell me a little about yourself, Johnny!"

Johnny was stunned. he couldnt belive that the teacher was telling him this! So, whats the moral of this story?

whenever someone asks you if you would like to know a little about themselves, always have a vidio camera near by.

Leave one.

:: 2004 4 March :: 5.27 pm

LOAF!
there once was a boy who was new in school. he went up to his teacher, Mr. Dumass, and said "hi! im Johnny! im new!"
"thats nice" said the teacher.
"want to learn a little about me, Johnny?"
"yup!"
" i have a urinary tract infection! and sometimes, when im lonly at night, i put on lipstick and pretend i am a woman. i also like to hear the word LOAF! just say that word, and i will die of laughter. LOAF! HAHAHAHAHA.....I dont have any children or a wife. i am a dragqueen! i like dogs. i have 4 sisters. there names are Valentina, Giavanna, Anntonetta, and George. She is gay too! i think i might have Herpies! i am 47. so, tell me a little about yourself, Johnny!"

Johnny was stunned. he couldnt belive that the teacher was telling him this! So, whats the moral of this story?

whenever someone asks you if you would like to know a little about themselves, always have a vidio camera near by.

Leave one.

:: 2004 4 March :: 4.17 pm
:: Mood: good.
:: Music: Hey Ya

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:: 2004 2 March :: 4.49 pm
:: Mood: normal. wow, thats the first time i put that as m
:: Music: Last Resort- Papa Roach

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:: 2004 29 February :: 4.25 pm
:: Music: Yellow- Coldplay

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:: 2004 27 February :: 6.47 pm

im 00.
jinri stamped my hand with a what is SUPPOSED to be "100' stamp w/ stars over it. when he stamped my hand, it came out "00" with stars all over it :(. this must be a singnal. im convinced.

we had the living museaum today. that means i had to wear a skirt and say the same crap about elizebeth Cady Stanton for 2 straight hours. it sucked. well, at least james had a potato. potatoes are coolio. but, the word coolio is not cool.

the word chillax is, though.

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:: 2004 26 February :: 8.43 pm

havent up-dated in awhile. not much has happened. well...i'd tell you if something did, wouldn't i?

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:: 2004 21 February :: 5.11 pm
:: Mood: could be better could be worse
:: Music: THe Darkness-I belive in a thing called love

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:: 2004 21 February :: 11.51 am
:: Mood: eh.

if i had something important to say i would say it. but i dont, so i am going to make up a story
And there she lay. Unable to move her body, Revalution lay at the foot of the stairs, too tired to cry. To tired to do anything but wait. Wait for someone to come save her, wait for someone to come up to her and tell her that they cared. Cared more then her father and mother ever did. Care enough to help her off of the dirty rug she lay on, and into their arms.

“It hadn’t always been like this”, she thought to herself. Revalution remembered a time in her life where both her mother and her father were there, helping her eat broken cheerios. Helping her count them, and helping her learn valuable skills in life. But those happy times did not last forever. As much as Revalution wanted to believe that the happy times in life were still there, they had all blown away, along with broken promises and dried up tears.

Her mother and father met on a bus, as she had heard many times before. They were both lost and confused, searching for the love of their life and being clearly unsuccessful. She thought that they still were. Unsuccessful. What has Revalution’s mother become? A loner who walked the streets at night, hoping for a little extra money to feed her grows family. What had her father become? A druggie that has no relations to them now? For all Revalution knew, he could be a multi-millionaire that got rich by winning the lottery. Most likely not, though. If that was so, then by this time he would have come and whisked Bart and Revalution away to his estate, and they would be living happily ever after.

Reva had one brother and one sister. Her sister had run away, though, too tired to face all accusations that her family faced. Her sister, Sandflower, had two children, twin boys. They were 4 now, and when Sandflower had them, she was 15. That means Sandflower would be 19 by now, an adult. But Revalution didn’t want to think about her sister. To much pain. Not enough hope. For now, Revalution did not want to think about anything except the present day. How she would feed Her 10 year old brother, Cody, and Duston. The twins. Reva could not be their mother, she knew, but she could be their provider. She had no choice.

Bart, on the other hand, had not run away. He was still very much with Revalution and the twins, always trying to find a way to get some quick cash, for dinner, or for himself. Bart was 10 years old, with very black hair, brown eyes, and a smile that would come unexpectedly, then fade away just as quick. He was always a quiet one, never talking to anyone except his family. When Reva thought about it, though, she realized it wasn’t that he wouldn’t talk to anyone else, just no one would talk to him. Or her. They were very much alone, very often.

Then again, being alone was a lot better then being surrounded by people you despise, calling your family poor white trash. Calling your mom a druggie and your dad a loser. Well, more like her dad. Bart’s dad must have been someone else, she thought, because he looked almost nothing like Revalution. She had light, mousy brown hair, with pale skin and green eyes. She suspected Bart’s father must have been Spanish or Italian, from the way his skin was always many shades darker then her’s even in the wintertime. Of course, Reva never said anything about that to Bart. As far as he was concerned, his dad might as well be on another planet. Bart always shrugged the rude comments off, and moved on with his life. Revalution could not do that. Every night before she went to sleep, she could not help but wonder if what the other kids said was true. Was her mom really a druggie? A hooker? Was her father really a loser? The more and more she thought about it; the more and more it seemed to be true.

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:: 2004 16 February :: 5.48 pm

The greatest idea EVER!!!!!!!!!
everyone, are you ready for the greatest idea EVER?!?!?!

if you have a cordless phone....
1)take the phone up to your room
2)set your alarm for 2a.m
3)at 2 a.m, when you wake up from the alarm, call your best friend in the whole wide world!
4)talk about anything, because anything goes at 2 a.m

hahahahaha i have too much time on my hands. ok, plan #2...Do this this saturday!

1)be at the mall at exatly 1:45p.m. with 2 of your best friends
2) go to you local dry ice
3) look! everyone that read's courtney's journal is here along with there 2 best friends! yey!
4) shop to your hearts content.

do that it will be fun !

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