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justplainolemica
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2006 10 April :: 8.26pm
:: Mood: squishy and happy
I think this is it folks. I don't know what else to say. I think everyday I get a little bit nuttier at the thoughts that run through my head. I wish I could make them stop. Not because they are bad thoughts, just the opposite in fact. But they are ones that I get so excited to think, but then eventually the logical part of my head chimes in that they are thoughts that I shouldn't be thinking. It's not even close to the time that I thought I should be thinkinging my thoughts. I'm a planner, and this wasn't the timing of my plan. But they are just such wonderful thoughts that I can't help myself. I just gotta think em!
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justplainolemica
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2006 22 March :: 5.11pm
:) Happy 6 months!
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justplainolemica
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2006 15 March :: 8.37pm
Gotta plan this Island trip. Talked to Cindy today and I need to secure some dates. I like to plan stuff like this and am slowly getting excited about it. Yep. Beaver Island is going to rock my face off! Yeppers bring on the sun!
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justplainolemica
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2006 20 February :: 6.35pm
Bad test today... first bad grade at Baker. Definately the drop test... thank goodness for the drop test. Now the new idea is to not have to have another drop test. I think we can do it. Yes I do.
WOAH DEJA VU! So mom went downstairs and the cereal commercial was on and I was writing in my journal, I believe there was a dream about this...
Ok, I had a big plan to do homework but I'm just not feelin it... maybe in an hour.
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justplainolemica
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2006 7 February :: 10.39pm
Good mood today, yes good mood indeed. True, I worked an hour later than I originally planned. But ya know what, I didn't have to work with Sam, and I get paid a little extra. So, as much as it stinks to get out later, it's also very cool.
I'm starting to get very excitied about this Big Rapids adventure. I love getting to go away and just be. Especially when it's always chuck full of smiles. And in this case, also full of presents! hehehe
Yup, feelin squishy, tryin to hold it back from journal land though. But just know, there is some squish goin on tonight. Think I'll head to bed now, gotta wake up in 7 hours... that's actually not a bad amount of sleep. Now that I've counted it out I'm gonna feel like a bum when I'm tired tomorrow.
Oh well. Good night to all!
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justplainolemica
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2006 28 January :: 6.57pm
Feeling a bit like 2nd place today. How often is it ok to remember the old times? And how do you ever know if its just thinking back, or wishing you were still there?
I like that I've lived life, but I've moved forward and don't want to be back to where I was. I like where I am now. I like that I can see that I've grown and changed into something better than I was a year ago, a month ago, a week ago. But how do you know if the world around you has changed? What if the world wants to go back to how it was a week ago? How would we ever know? We wouldn't. Not unless it gave us signs.
In my life I think I'm seeing the signs.
That puts me in 2nd place. Things can't be like they were last year, and since they can't I guess they settled on now with me.
But is 2nd place all I'm cracked up to be?
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justplainolemica
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2006 22 January :: 9.34am
I learn to play the guitar today... my poor fingers
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justplainolemica
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2006 9 January :: 10.51pm
Every now and then I find a moment in life that just makes me pause to say wow. And last night was one of those moments. Friday night I get to go be a groupie for my Charlie's band at some podunk bar in a town that I dont know where it is. But I'm really really excited about it. Thats the part that makes me say wow. It's not that I'm super into music, if you knew me youd know that about the only cds that make it into my car are: Rent, Pete Yorn, and Medical Termonology. So its not like I'm super into music by any means. Just the look on his face when he told me he got to play. I love to see the real Charlie smile. There's a difference between when he smiles because he thinks he should and the smile because he's truely happy. This was a truely happy smile and that made me wow. I want to be there to see him rock his stuff!
Also I just re-read some of his "squishy" entries, and that made me smile too!
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justplainolemica
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2006 4 January :: 5.04pm
In a weird mood today and I don't know how to describe it. So I'm not gonna try. I think what would fix this mood is a little bit of the old Mica. Just a little though. I dunno which parts of me to bring out though, since the old Mica, lets face it, was no good. I think maybe some drinkin or some clubbin could fix this though... yes, thats my mission.
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justplainolemica
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2005 21 December :: 2.53pm
Everyone should read this entry
Good Mood.
Just witnessed the most amazing thing I've ever seen... in person. This lady gives me a whole new definition of pain. I was observing PT today and this lady has stunned the entire medical world. See, she has a CNS disorder that no one has ever seen before. She explained to me that its like the worse charlie horse you've ever had in your life. And this happens to all her muscles, inside and out. And it happens to her all day long and she can't control it. So, shes been friends with this therapist for years and she came to him with back pain, then the disease started and shes just gotten worse. Well, insurances stopped covering her, bastards! They say that no progress is being made so no more payment. But the therapist sees her anyway. See, she can't eat or sleep as her internal muscles (ie digestion) spasm just as much as her external muscles. And she can't sleep cuz it just hurts to live, so sleeping just doesnt happen. Also, she has a pump inside her constantly giving her muscle relaxer medicine directly into her spinal cord. So, anyway, she gets treated anyway.... Why? cuz after about an hour of the scariest therapy I've ever seen all her muscles relax and she can lay perfectly still for a few hours so she can sleep. Also, her internal muscles relax enough to go to the bathroom. She is my new hero. The therapy was about an hour long, and I cried just watching it. She screams in pain and prays a lot. It's scary.
So I know no one reads my journal but I hope that if anyone ever does they get this one simple thing out of it... life isnt that bad.
Journals seem to be chuck full of bitching and mine was no different. But holy wow has today made a lasting impression on me. I've never been in a room with someone crying out in pain to God thanking him for the gift that she knows will result from her therapy and also just praying for life... a life that someday will be back to how it was when she didn't twitch constantly and when she could walk and do all the things that we all take for granted everyday. I think we should all be a bit more like her. She is in more pain than most of us will ever be in our life and she has endured it everyday for the past 10 years and she still thanks God for the life and good times he's given her. She's thankful for what she has and it is amazing.
I will never forget today and she has invited me to see more of her therapy and to keep in touch with her and her life and I'm definitely going to take her up on it. It was a life changing day today... I hope everyone gets to have a day like this in their life.
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justplainolemica
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2005 11 December :: 9.23am
Excited, I'm very excited.
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justplainolemica
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2005 5 December :: 6.50am
Dumb Sleep
Went to bed last night after some studying only to dream about what I was studying. It's very very sad to spend all night thinking "in a nonsteroid hormone, the hormone itself is the first messanger" BLAH! So now I have to go take my test. Little nervous about today, dont know why, but I am. Hopfully nothing bad happens that will make me think "thats why I was nervous" Lets hope!
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justplainolemica
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2005 1 December :: 11.41am
:: Music: ER
Watching ER and thanking God that he didnt tell me to be a doctor. I dont like to work lotsa hours and so I'm glad I dont want to be a Dr. Not to mention that people are dumb. I think I'd have very little patience for dumb people.
Well, this is kinda a meaningless post huh? I told myself I'd study for my massive amounts of tests, but getting the motivation to study is kinda difficult. I hate to study, and my books are in the car and its cold out.
Deep thought of the day: 10 months till I'm 21. Getting closer... can hold it on two hands! On a completely different note, Outta school for summer by June 10. So hehe hunny plan us a trip to the island!
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justplainolemica
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2005 30 November :: 7.05am
:: Mood: smushy
Wish me luck!
Today is my final speech. After some rehursing last night I feel that I should be ok. And if not, then oh well, I cant suck it up too bad. And afterwards I get to disect an eye, so that'll make me feel better anyway. I love lab!
Last night, good night. Saw Rent, twice. I love that movie. And I love the people I saw it with. Ashley and Charlie. Two people that I'm probably closest with. So that made me happy. Then come home to cuddles. What more could a girl want?
Yep, its good bein me today!
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justplainolemica
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2005 23 November :: 10.08pm
It's 10:00pm on a Weds. night. Tomorrow better be a good day for me, I'm a little worried... a lotta worried
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