I wanna take a ride on your disco stick
Time to go to bed because I have to work at six thirty in the morning. Bah. This will be the last time, though, because I changed my availability. I will have six roommates this year and it's not fair nor is it realistic that they will be quiet after ten pm on Friday and Saturday nights. Therefore, I said I can't work until nine in the morning after this weekend.
I work the next three days and then I'm off to home for five days for a bit of a vacation which includes a shopping excursion to Valueland with my mother and grandmother and a family reunion.
I tried on most of my clothes today to figure out which ones still fit and which ones don't. Because of my illness I went from a size 16/18 to a size 6/8 in the past year. Right now I'm hovering around a 10/12, which is perfectly fine for me. However, that means that I have a ton of clothes that don't fit-old and new. Luckily, I didn't buy too many small clothes when I was really sick, so I only have a few pairs of pants that are too small; most of my clothes are way too big. I'm donating them when I go to Valueland next week.
"Now and then she appointed trysts beneath certain shrubs about the grounds, where he would find her naked, or with her clothing half torn to ribbons upon her, in the wild throes of nymphomania, her body gleaming in the slow shifting from one to another of such formally erotic attitudes and gestures as a Beardsley of the time of Petronius might have drawn. She would be wild then, in the close, breathing halfdark without walls, with her wild hair, each strand of which would seem to come alive like octopus tentacles, and her wild hands and her breathing: 'Negro! Negro! Negro!' "
-Light in August, Faulkner
So...five year anniversary with Meijer today. I can't believe I've wasted so many years in that place. At least I get good hours and although I'm not making that much I have an in with management and it's relatively easy work.
This morning around three a nine year old girl stole about three hundred dollars worth of stuff from the store. She had snuck out of the house and rode her bike to Meijer. On her way (back home?) she got pulled over by the cops. Her mom had to take her to the hospital because she had cut herself with the utility knife that she stole to open the merchandise packages. After that, the mom brought her back to the store (about seven am when i first opened the desk) and purchased the stuff that she opened and got blood on and returned the other stuff that was still in the packaging. The girl didn't even look upset.
An old angry man threw his Meijer Credit Card at me yesterday when I told him I couldn't check his balance for him and that he'd have to call the number on the back of the card. I promptly said, "Sir, I want you to know that was very rude and I do not appreciate it" like he was five years old. He apologized and said he didn't mean any "offense."
Idea for graduate admission paper: Analyze three or four contemporary American novels (1980 to present) cataloging the decline and/or transformation of religion in the American population. Contemporary cultural criticism; additional information found from research polls and other cultural articles related to thesis.
So, one more regular week left of school and then final exam week. A million papers due and a few exams.
Wednesday afternoon at work I realized that my right lower gum behind my wisdom tooth was hurting. Thursday it started to swell and by this morning it became bigger than my wisdom tooth. I called around to a few dentists in Mt. Pleasant because it hurt like a bitch and ended up going to the hospital to ready care. They gave me a script for some antibiotics, and antiinflammitory, and some prescription ibruprofen. On my way to Meijer to pick it up I realized that it was getting smaller and that my stomach hurt. I'm pretty sure I swallowed some nasty stuff that was in the huge inflamed bump. Gross. I came home, took the drugs, ate some ice cream and mashed potatoes and took a two hour nap. I'm still quite drowsy.
Rueben is at home and sick. He's not doing well at all.
I'm in band-aides. It's a small help desk/store for the music building. It's staffed by people from my fraternity.
University Band tonight. I practiced last night for a while and got some parts in shape. That's the first time I had practiced in quite a while. Drew, my conductor and my honorary little came knocked on my practice room door and was excited that I was practicing. No one in university band practices much-that's why we suck so much. Oh well.
Another paper down-I think I got it-had a french exam yesterday-barely finished it. I'm sticking with French. I only have one more year and then I'll be done. I'm starting to like it. I've finally figured out how to study for it and consequently am getting better grades.
That reminds me, I have vocabulary cards I need to make...
It's the middle-end half of the semester and I can't wait for summer to get here. I feel like this semester had way more work than any previous semester. I'm writing over 16 papers, having over 15 exams, and over 2000 pages of reading (one being an 800 page novel entitled "Middlemarch"). Add to that the fraternity and working twenty eight hours a week; it's been trying.
I have class in about a half an hour: political science. It's about foreign policy, which is alright, but not my favorite. I get to take the better classes next year.
I figured it out, I only have three more semesters left, so it'll be four and a half years in total. I think I'm going to do an internship, too, since I'll be finished in December and Grad school doesn't start until August. I was thinking about doing an internship in Lansing with a congressman and seeing where that takes me. Lansing is only a fifty mile drive from Mt. Pleasant, and a few day a week wouldn't be that bad. We'll see!
For now, things are going good. I'm able to eat again and that's making me gain weight back...not too much, though. I'm still much more little than I was. C'est la vie!
So... I'm a lot less grumpy than I was this morning. I finally finished my paper on Structuralism, although it's not a full two pages. I think it'll be fine. Who cares how Torodov uses Saussures concepts in order to analyze narrative plot?!?! Gah.
So, I have to work tonight, still have a few more classes today. I have a french oral exam tomorrow, then I have Literary theory, band, meeting, then I get to sleep in on Friday morning. Woot!
I hope i get my grade back for my political science (foreign policy) exam. I'm not sure how I did.
I'm super busy and I've been grumpy to Rueben. Sorry, dear!
Rueben, I'm sitting up at a computer on the fourth floor of the library by the big windows because our phones don't work. Again.
Ahhh. I also forgot my literary theory book. See, I thought I was suppose to write a paper on this horrible forty page article about reader response theory and it turns out it's on the eleven page less scary one that I actually understood, except the only problem is that I didn't bring my book, so I can't do that paper. But, I did do my paper that is due on Friday for my Victorian Literature and Thought class, so I'm a little ahead, but still behind :(
It's super nice out today and I feel like I want to be outside but I'm stuck in here in the library because that's where Rueben knows I will be because our phones don't work because SOMEBODY didn't pay the bill. I guess we probably should have checked that out after what happened last time. Oh well. I think I'll go through and plan my future now. I'm not doing French anymore. Well, I am. I'm in French 102 this semester, but I'm NOT fulfilling my BA requirement and taking a whole nother year of it and killing myself. No siree. So, that means that I'm switching to a Bachelor of Science which won't be quite so bad and I really only have english class, political science classes and three science classes to take for it. Yippee.
AHH. I'm sick, too. bah. I'm feeling better since I wrote my paper and I know that it's fanfuckingtastic. I feel a little crazy right now. AHH. Woohudotcom. bah. Fifty more minutes until Rueben is done with his lab. Then I can go to the store, get my pills, buy some cookies, go home, write my other paper, maybe, go to uband, go to the concert, go home, go to bed, go to class, go to work, go home, go to bed......
I'm home with the parents right now. I've been home for a few days since my seniority at work actually got me valuable time off for once. I've leaving tomorrow afternoon, though, because I have to work at five thirty on the day after Christmas, although Meijer doesn't actually open until six.
I'm going to be alone for a few weeks since Rueben is staying down here to work and I have to go back to Mt. Pleasant to work. I've already planned on going on a baking frenzy to take up my time. I think I'm also going to start working out at the student activity center now that I'm feeling better.
And I am feeling better. I've been able to actually eat for about three weeks now. I've gained about ten pounds back, so I don't look so scary any more.
Grades are in, I got all B's and a B+ in my English class, and I'm okay with that. If I can pull all B's while almost dying, I think I did well.
I'm not looking forward to driving home tomorrow, but I think I'll be alright.
It was nice having a few days off, and I'll be ready when next semester starts in a few weeks.
I haven't updated in a while. I haven't had time. No. That's incorrect. I haven't had the motivation.
Something is wrong. I'm sleeping all of the time and always tired. It's not depression. I went to the doctor's and they told me I had a viral infection and anemia. A week later, it should be better, but I slept for over twelve hours last night and I've been laying down every chance I get.
I went home on Sunday for a family reunion and the only things people said to me is that I look like a poster child for anorexia and I look tired. I've lost almost eighty pounds. I'm trying to stay stable at 130.
Although my test came back negative for mono, I still think I probably have it. Why else would I be so tired all of the time? Everything is suffering because of it: my grades, my attitude, my dealings with my friends and brothers.
Sometimes I feel like I'm the only one laughing, the only one aware. I just can't shake the feeling that sometimes I see things in a way that no one else can even comprehend.
Central won against Western. For those of you who don't know, it's a big deal. There are five state troopers parked about two hundred yards away from my apartment to keep things "under control." This is probably the quietest Saturday night of the year as of yet.