When We Live

:: 2003 29 August :: 7.43am
:: Mood: fuck i ogtta get ready for school!!
:: Music: dumbness

coffeee with nilla ice cream is VERY yummy.
Thanks for the quiz lindsey!

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:: 2003 28 August :: 7.14pm
:: Mood: tired
:: Music: hey arnold from lil person

First Day of School
sucked balls. science was ok...boring and we got homework but ok. I think my science teacher is gay. Math is ok and so is English i spose cept my teacher for english is VERY annoying and i have fifty papers to be signed for math and homework in english. history was quite good. then choir. we have a messed up schedule kuz the orchestra is using the room that period. I had E lunch with roxanne, gwen, and lots of freinds like that. in order to be in choir, i have to change my lunch to c and completely mess my schedule up. i am very happy with e lunch so i guess no choir=(. that would mean i would have NO electives and 2 study halls. in study hall i was so bored i decided i dont even want one study hall. they just suck and are VERY long. i also go from honors math to honors english which is alot of brainwork for 2 periods :-/. so i shall now go to sleep...it will be grand.

:: 2003 27 August :: 2.02pm
:: Mood: calmly stressed
:: Music: "When I Grow Up" Garbage

Time to Celebrate!
Yes, I've finally found another argument for myself to weasel into. Just the perfect start to the school year, cynnical to every new person I meet. RaaB can be angry all he wants, he can curse my name all he wants, but that doesn't mean I'll back off right yet. Not unless I've said something to anger Schylar or Roxanne will I back down. This is the first time I'm fighting with loyalties in a good 3 years. I don't think I can remember how anymore...

4 truthsooth sayers | lie

:: 2003 26 August :: 4.51pm
:: Mood: I think I have athritis in my right hand
:: Music: leather moving from the chair and stone temple pilots

I got a doggie pup on right side and a kitty kat on left
I am still working on Grapes of Wrath and school starts in fucking 2 days!!!!! i am on page 520 need like somewhere between 5 and 7 entires and need an essay. I found a great page that Gwen gave me...it has the exact answers to the essays!=b Mishellio needs to resond to me please!!!!!!! I am bored so decided to bore you all with my homework and burdens. Shane just left so now there is nobody on worth talking to. I think they should get smileys for journals. That would be nifty.

15 truthsooth sayers | lie

:: 2003 26 August :: 1.41pm
:: Mood: anxiety problems...

aaaarg!!!
DAMN ENGLISH PROJECTS!!!!!!!!
anyways... I've got my first school soccer game today... yeah... blah... bye now..

:: 2003 25 August :: 6.34pm
:: Mood: lazy
:: Music: bitch bitch bitch! im singing to meself I LIKE CHEESE!!!!..The Leaving Song

im gonna drink me some coffee!!!!!
I had a strange dream this afternoon. It goes as follows.

I was at a Monsters concert in a big arena thing and they had played so I was wallking around. The next band up was AFI. I went to get a good seat and I got the best I could which was with the band completely UNDER me while I sat in the stands. I had a camera and I was taking pictures(that were actually good) and I realized I was almost outta film. I looked and it was only 7 exposure film. Davey was dressed as a Chinese chick and kept changing makeup and outfits every song but it only took him like 5 seconds to do it. Bailey was suddenly there and she offered to go get me more film since it was only 77 cents. She left with this chick and then I found Alysha Hauer and sat with her. I then woke up.

I have not done much of anything AFI related lately. I do not like the number 7. I do not have anything against the number 7. Why is Alysha Hauer in my dreams? Why am I in a questioning mood today? I shall go take shower soon kuz bailey wants me to go with her to get her shirt back from Jana. Love, Peace, and Prosperity to like 2 people that read this, or i spose anyone that does kuz they ARE reading this....

:: 2003 25 August :: 4.58pm
:: Mood: fucked
:: Music: none

...
Just a moment when I'd like to yell a fucking storm through this house... but that can't happen, people are occupying my space....
I swear I'm going to start convulsions with the anger that I don't let out.... something's going to die by me... not a good feeling to have....

:: 2003 25 August :: 4.47pm
:: Mood: nonchalant
:: Music: "My Love Is Like (Whoa)" -Mya

finished the book...
That is not a nice book.... yeah, it's a good story... but... I don't know... just hard to read... not like, words, but.... the idea that this really did happen.... yeah...

:: 2003 24 August :: 9.27pm
:: Mood: sludgy...
:: Music: "Fly Away" -Lenny Kravits

waiting for this time to pass
All I can do is sit here and wait for the moments to pass. Nothing to do, nothing to say. All there is is the wait for the future. Wait, I feel a second passing by. Maybe now, maybe later, but the future makes me wonder. Wonder about death, wonder about aging, wonder about friendships, wonder about the mind. The mind. This is what the future is about. All about what synchronized synapses of multiple minds can impulse, force on the future. We don't even need the physical features. Who really cares what the buildings look like, what our cars will be, what we sleep in. What about the biology, the landscape, the human psyche. What matters is how we think. We need to find our termination point. Our timeline is dying every day. Now is the time when we fix our deaths. Choose your target wisely. And make sure your target is fixed; we'd hate to see you chasing your death to the horizon of time.

:: 2003 24 August :: 6.28pm
:: Mood: annoyed
:: Music: Victoms. Aren't we all?..Suddenly i heard a tapping, a gentle rapping a rappin at my chamber door

FUCK I AM PROCRASTINATING!!!!!!!SCHOOL STARTS IN 4 DAYS!!!4!!!!!!!!!!!
I went to the Monsters! show on Saturday with Bailey. All of the bands sucked except the Monsters! in my opinion. I didnt like the guy that looked like a Latino popstar wannabe though. The Circle of Glee was gleeful. There were some stupid people sitting in chairs that were not gleeful and should be shot. Roxanne, Raab, Shane, Schylar, Andrew, and Beth were there. They were stupid. I was about to slap somebody on numerous occasions. hmm...wonder who that wouldve been kuz it takes sooo much to guess....Bai and I decorated Shane's car with flowers but I don't think he appreciated it kuz he's and ungrateful fuck. yep. The Monsters farewell show is on the 5th. Everyone should go. They rock. I have to go read GOW now. I have a LARGE amount left =(

EDITING TIME!!! i got sick of typing before. i was kinna stranded at the show after it. we used Scott's cell phone and called but bais ppl would not answer their damn phone. We finally(like ten minutes later) used Jacko's cellphone and called the grandparents and got a ride home. Then we got high and baked cakes for the stepdads bday.

2 truthsooth sayers | lie

:: 2003 23 August :: 8.22pm
:: Mood: screwed over
:: Music: "Pirates" soundtrack...

damn procrastination...
Yeah, so I'm really getting in deep this time... I still have 234 pages left in that GODAWFUL book.... actually, the book isn't bad, it's just that I'm required to read it, which makes me put my 6 other books on hold.... AND I have to try to look good at soccer, AND there's a project for the book, AND there's back-to-school shopping, AND it's my mom's birthday, AND I finally found a tutorial for making Celtic knots (yeah, a good thing, but it distracts me...)
So, of course, my parents have to be on my ass the whole time to get the book done... I'd get it done if I wasn't being hassled so much:
As I'm going to get my book, "Nick, you should read your book."
"*parent I'm speaking to*, yes, I know."
"I know you know, but that doesn't mean it's getting done."
"I'm going to read right now."
"Then why are you standing here talking?"
"You told me to read my book."
"So you stick around to chat?"
"No, I tell you to stop, because I'm working on it."
"Well you don't seem to be working hard enough."
"Can I-"
"You should go read now."
"I'm trying to-"
"GO READ."
"I KNOW."
"Then get after it!"

Oy.... yes... parents are evil.... very evil... they tempt us to argue and ignore the things that must get done... grrr, parents, grrrrrrrr....

:: 2003 22 August :: 10.29am
:: Mood: tired
:: Music: "When I Grow Up" Garbage

I feel like being a sheep...
So, I'm just following the crowd, giving my update on school.... Oy, orientation at CMR was... it. yeah...
We have preps and jocks in student body office (Why can I never get used to this??) Anyways, I've already seen most of the school... the only new thing was the locker rooms...ooo...ahhh.... So, yeah... most of the seniors doing tours knew who I was already (the problems with a popular sister)... some people may think it's great to have senior friends, but they're all just like little 5 year olds.... And (amazingly...) the area was dominated with preps... I was stuck with my sister's *tour group*.... BUT!! I met yet another of Nick lovers anonymous... yes, I was asked out by someone that I've only seen passing by twice in my life.... so that was orientation...
Us JV's got beated bad by Varsity last night... but that's how it always goes... yes, soccer makes me very sore.... We have to go watch the GFH scrimmage tonight.... I don't know if I'll go to our football game, cause I have to finish Grapes of Wrath.... If my parents would get off my ass about it, it would be much easier to read.... but, I don't find it a bad book... except for the auto mechanics... I don't care about that....

4 truthsooth sayers | lie

:: 2003 21 August :: 5.57pm
:: Mood: tired
:: Music: Weezer...Ataris

orientation.
i went to bed at like 4 and got up somewhere between 7:30 and 8 so i was in a hyper tired mood and i ended up laughing all through the dudes(class prez maybe?) speech. schylar and bailey have the same pink in their hair. i also laughed at that. i dont have many classes with friends..actually only math with kim and english with gwen. what fun this year will be. i am not sharing a locker with bailey. i dunno if i AM sharin a locker. it's right next to schylars. i gonna try to get outta study hall and i wanna be in drama DAMNIT, but i know that's not possible. ill try for debate. now i want orange ice cream. yuuuummmmmmmmm